Inside Out
folder
Naruto Crossovers › General
Rating:
Adult +
Chapters:
3
Views:
1,179
Reviews:
69
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Category:
Naruto Crossovers › General
Rating:
Adult +
Chapters:
3
Views:
1,179
Reviews:
69
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Disclaimer:
I do not own the anime Naruto, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.
Inside Out
Title: Inside Out
Pairing: Sasuke X Kogepan
Spoilers: Kogepan ep. 5
Rating: Ummm, it's kinda wierd... not... QUITE sex... but maybe some kinda disturbing images... I guess I'd put it at... PG13? Definitely not higher. Okay, let's just rate this "C" for Crack.
Warnings: somewhat weird. excessive drama. angst. crossover. May break brain.
Disclaimer: Kishimoto Masashi owns Naruto, I own a time share on Sasuke, and some fucked up Japanese person owns Kogepan. I don't own any part of Kogepan, but I burnt my bagel the other day. It was sad.
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Sasuke was starving when he got back from training. Like always, he'd pushed himself to the limits to stay vastly ahead of Naruto and make himself stronger. Now the abridged lunch he'd eaten to give himself extra time to get ahead had left his stomach more impatient than usual.
He was thinking of assaulting the Ramen Stand on his way home, but the delicious smell of fresh bread coming from the bakery sidetracked his plans. He glanced over the rows of baked goods, his eyes settling hungirly on some tasty-looking rolls.
"How much are those rolls on the top shelf?" he asked the baker.
"They're 220 yen each, six for 1,000."
"I'll take a dozen," said Sasuke.
"Sorry, but we only have eleven of those left," said the baker.
"Hnn, I'll take that burnt one over there, too," he said, pointing.
The baker looked. "Well, I don't think you'd want such a burnt piece of bread! If you don't mind waiting a few minutes, I can bake you up a nice fresh batch!"
"Naah, that's fine. I don't really care. Just pack those twelve up and I'll be on my way."
Sasuke ate one of the rolls on the way home, and plopped the bag on the counter while he made a quick trip to the bathroom.
When he returned to the kitchen, he was surprised to find the burnt bread drinking his milk. Straight out of the bottle, too, Sasuke noted with dismay.
"What the hell are you doing?"
"Oi, I must apologize," said the bread. "You were such a kind stranger to take me home, I should have asked before drinking your milk." He wavered and fell over backwards, and tipped more milk down his throat while still on his back. Then he sat up rather unsteadily and said, "My name is Kogepan, may I ask yours?"
"Sasuke," he replied, looking at the bread oddly. "And you can go ahead and finish the milk."
Kogepan hiccoughed in thanks and raised the bottle in a "cheers" motion before taking another huge gulp. Sasuke noticed that his cheeks were noticeably flushed.
"Are you.... drunk?"
Kogepan drained the last of the milk and tipped over, splaying his legs seductively as he did so. "I drink milk so I will become soft and desireable," he said, "and people will want to eat me." He kneaded his sides between his fists.
Sasuke picked him up and ran his thumbs in firm but gentle strokes around Kokgepan's sides. "You feel allright to me." He licked his tongue along Kogepan's crust. "I would eat you. I would gobble you up. Well, maybe I'd soak you in French onion soup first..."
"Do-- do you really think so?" asked Kogepan, looking as if tears were about to well up in his eyes. Then his head dropped and he said in his usual cynical deadpan, "You're only saying that to be nice to me. You want to make me happy because you'll know I'll never be like the pretty breads."
On the counter, the other ten loaves of bread bounced and smiled winningly.
Sasuke stalked over to the counter and knocked them onto the floor. The breads cried in despair, and one shrieked when he kicked it across the room. "Who wants perfect bread?!!" he growled. "Happy little unscathed pieces of perfection? Thinking they're better than anyone who's had misfortune in their lives? Filled with nothing but happiness and sun?"
"I'm filled with jam," whispered Kogepan.
"I'm filled with sorrow!" shouted Sasuke, stomping another bread flat. "I'm filled with pain! I'm filled with anger! I'm filled with vengeance!" He sat down in the middle of the remaining whimpering breads and pressed his forehead against Kogepan's shoulder. "I'm filled with scars..."
"Ahh, Sasuke-kun, you appear to be as burnt as I am... but at least you look pretty enough that someone would want you."
"Kogepan, you may be burnt on the outside, but inside you're still good! Now me, everyone wants me because I'm so pretty on the outside, but if they knew that on the inside I was even more burnt than you, then-- then-- they'd recoil, and even ones who don't mind burnt bread would reject me!"
He pushed Kogepan firmly against the counter with one hand and weilded a bread knife with another. "At least you," whispered Sasuke, "are filled with jam." He sliced Kogepan neatly in half and sucked out the sweet jam, saying around the sticky mouthful, "It's what's inside that counts."
~Owari~
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Please review! I know this fic is downright awful, so go ahead and flame!!! I will bask in the warm attention! Just as long as I do not become burnt and undesirable like poor Kogepan.
Pairing: Sasuke X Kogepan
Spoilers: Kogepan ep. 5
Rating: Ummm, it's kinda wierd... not... QUITE sex... but maybe some kinda disturbing images... I guess I'd put it at... PG13? Definitely not higher. Okay, let's just rate this "C" for Crack.
Warnings: somewhat weird. excessive drama. angst. crossover. May break brain.
Disclaimer: Kishimoto Masashi owns Naruto, I own a time share on Sasuke, and some fucked up Japanese person owns Kogepan. I don't own any part of Kogepan, but I burnt my bagel the other day. It was sad.
--------------------------------------
Sasuke was starving when he got back from training. Like always, he'd pushed himself to the limits to stay vastly ahead of Naruto and make himself stronger. Now the abridged lunch he'd eaten to give himself extra time to get ahead had left his stomach more impatient than usual.
He was thinking of assaulting the Ramen Stand on his way home, but the delicious smell of fresh bread coming from the bakery sidetracked his plans. He glanced over the rows of baked goods, his eyes settling hungirly on some tasty-looking rolls.
"How much are those rolls on the top shelf?" he asked the baker.
"They're 220 yen each, six for 1,000."
"I'll take a dozen," said Sasuke.
"Sorry, but we only have eleven of those left," said the baker.
"Hnn, I'll take that burnt one over there, too," he said, pointing.
The baker looked. "Well, I don't think you'd want such a burnt piece of bread! If you don't mind waiting a few minutes, I can bake you up a nice fresh batch!"
"Naah, that's fine. I don't really care. Just pack those twelve up and I'll be on my way."
Sasuke ate one of the rolls on the way home, and plopped the bag on the counter while he made a quick trip to the bathroom.
When he returned to the kitchen, he was surprised to find the burnt bread drinking his milk. Straight out of the bottle, too, Sasuke noted with dismay.
"What the hell are you doing?"
"Oi, I must apologize," said the bread. "You were such a kind stranger to take me home, I should have asked before drinking your milk." He wavered and fell over backwards, and tipped more milk down his throat while still on his back. Then he sat up rather unsteadily and said, "My name is Kogepan, may I ask yours?"
"Sasuke," he replied, looking at the bread oddly. "And you can go ahead and finish the milk."
Kogepan hiccoughed in thanks and raised the bottle in a "cheers" motion before taking another huge gulp. Sasuke noticed that his cheeks were noticeably flushed.
"Are you.... drunk?"
Kogepan drained the last of the milk and tipped over, splaying his legs seductively as he did so. "I drink milk so I will become soft and desireable," he said, "and people will want to eat me." He kneaded his sides between his fists.
Sasuke picked him up and ran his thumbs in firm but gentle strokes around Kokgepan's sides. "You feel allright to me." He licked his tongue along Kogepan's crust. "I would eat you. I would gobble you up. Well, maybe I'd soak you in French onion soup first..."
"Do-- do you really think so?" asked Kogepan, looking as if tears were about to well up in his eyes. Then his head dropped and he said in his usual cynical deadpan, "You're only saying that to be nice to me. You want to make me happy because you'll know I'll never be like the pretty breads."
On the counter, the other ten loaves of bread bounced and smiled winningly.
Sasuke stalked over to the counter and knocked them onto the floor. The breads cried in despair, and one shrieked when he kicked it across the room. "Who wants perfect bread?!!" he growled. "Happy little unscathed pieces of perfection? Thinking they're better than anyone who's had misfortune in their lives? Filled with nothing but happiness and sun?"
"I'm filled with jam," whispered Kogepan.
"I'm filled with sorrow!" shouted Sasuke, stomping another bread flat. "I'm filled with pain! I'm filled with anger! I'm filled with vengeance!" He sat down in the middle of the remaining whimpering breads and pressed his forehead against Kogepan's shoulder. "I'm filled with scars..."
"Ahh, Sasuke-kun, you appear to be as burnt as I am... but at least you look pretty enough that someone would want you."
"Kogepan, you may be burnt on the outside, but inside you're still good! Now me, everyone wants me because I'm so pretty on the outside, but if they knew that on the inside I was even more burnt than you, then-- then-- they'd recoil, and even ones who don't mind burnt bread would reject me!"
He pushed Kogepan firmly against the counter with one hand and weilded a bread knife with another. "At least you," whispered Sasuke, "are filled with jam." He sliced Kogepan neatly in half and sucked out the sweet jam, saying around the sticky mouthful, "It's what's inside that counts."
~Owari~
--------------------------------------------------------------
Please review! I know this fic is downright awful, so go ahead and flame!!! I will bask in the warm attention! Just as long as I do not become burnt and undesirable like poor Kogepan.