Worldviews

“Worldviews”
A TWO-SHOT


Warnings: This is YAOI. It is AU. It is also unbetaed. Read at your own risk.

Main Pairing: Orochimaru/Jiraiya

Minor Pairing: Orochimaru/Sasuke

Disclaimer: I don’t own Naruto-like things. It is fanfiction so I receive no capital for writing this. Though, I must admit it is a rather extraordinary stress reliever.

Summary: Jiraiya catches Orochimaru cheating on him with his protégé Sasuke. From there…things fall apart. YAOI Oro/Jira; Oro/Sasu (unique pairings, yes?)

‘…’ internal dialogue
“…” spoken dialogue


***Jiraiya’s World

‘It’s not like I didn’t know. I knew. Well, I suspected at least,’ I think to myself as I stand here waiting outside of Orochimaru’s hotel room. Listening. Listening to sex. Listening to desire. Listening to Sasuke respond to my lover’s cock. I can hear him in their soaking in his depravity. Soaking in Orochimaru’s power. Stealing from me. Stealing from us.


***Sasuke’s World

“Aw God, Oro..” I whine with a guttural tone, straining my arms and ass so I can push back against Orochimaru’s thrusts. Hands and knees. I barely notice any other pressure points besides hands, knees, and the feel of his cock in my ass. Rocking with his thrusts, I can’t help but think that when we are like this, we are perfect. Made to fuck each other. And I know I am good. I know Jiraiya can’t be this. Can’t be me. I know I possess this Orochimaru. He is mine.

“Right there. Please,” I beg allowing hot breath to dilute the natural timbre of my voice.

Orochimaru quickens his thrusts, turned on by my tone- by my begging. I allow a little smirk as I drop my head down between my outstretched arms. I stretch my back like a cat for a better fit. Opening myself up to be abused. Knowing my catlike movements make him lose control.

I always know just how to make him hot. Just how to make this good for him. I can’t see his face, but I don’t need to. All I need is his dick and his thrusts and I have all the information I need to make him cum like he never has before.

Fuck Jiraiya. Orochimaru is mine.

“Beg me. Beg me,” Orochimaru chants, grunting with the effort to slam into my ass. His fingers grasp my hips tightly. I almost cum as his hands on my body turn painful. But this is what I need. This is what he needs. Possession. Absolute possession. I need it. I need his power. To fill it ripping through me, becoming mine. Right now, I own him, everything he has ever been and everything he will ever be. I can feel him pouring all of himself into me from his fingertips. Through the grip that will never be able to let me go.

My head falls forward as I start whispering words of surrender. “Please, Oro. Please, fuck me. Please. Fuck..ahh.”

I know he can barely hear it. It is not enough. I know it. But he will come back. He will come back for this in hopes that I will give him more the next time. I own him. He is mine.

I spread my legs and drop my head to the stack of pillows in front of me, so that I can reach down to jerk myself off. Orochimaru’s thrusts have gotten violent. It hurts. It hurts my face sliding across the bedding and my ass. I feel like I am open wide enough for the whole world to see and it feels so good. He is so powerful- fucking me with abandon. Hurting me the way I like. Training me to receive his power. That is what makes sex with Orochimaru so damn good. The power. It is mine. All it takes is two strokes and I am cumming…groaning my pleasure…fighting to milk the plateau for as long as I can. Dwell in the stink of sex and power.

He’s mine… We are fucking perfect.

***Jiraiya’s World

I knew. I’ve always known that Sasuke is more than a successor. I knew the minute Orochimaru introduced him to me what he was my…replacement. I wish I could be angry. I feel nothing. I loved Orochimaru with everything I have. I’ve poured into him everything I ever wanted and everything he ever asked of me. And he has betrayed me more times than I can count. And even now…even after hearing him fuck that little man the way he has never fucked me…I love him still. I love him still.

I can’t stop the tears that begin to flow down my cheeks as I move to rest against the opposing wall in the hallway. It is over. We are over. He doesn’t want me. He doesn’t love me the same any more. This young man… This Sasuke is what he wants.

I try to let the reality of this situation settle in my soul. In my heart. But all I can hear is a voice screaming in the back of my head, ‘But I loved him. I love him still.’

***Orochimaru’s World

I can barely hear Sasuke. I know he is begging. I can’t help but allow my thrusts to get erratic and uneven as I pull Sasuke back to meet my pelvis time and again. The pleasure and the pain of meeting his body so violently are so intense. Almost too much. I can’t get this out of my system. I crave it. I want it. And I hate it. I hate Sasuke. I hate this. But I can’t do without it. And I hate my weakness. But all this hate is what makes fucking him so good.

I hate that I need him. I need his body. I know that without it I am nothing. Without Sasuke, I am an old man, wounded beyond repair. Without his body…this body opening wide and swallowing me whole, I am nothing.

I start slamming into him hard- trying to hurt him. Trying to hurt myself. Trying to make this good, all the while hating Sasuke. Hating his beauty. Hating his strength. Hating his youth. As the hate rises the sharpness of my pleasure rises to an unbearable pitch. Fucking him into myself. Taking what is his so that it can become mine. All that he is, is mine right now. This hole to be fucked. This body to be controlled. This mouth to beg. All of it is mine. I need it to stay alive. And I hate him for that.

I feel my balls tighten up as I dwell in hard ecstacy and hate. Possessing him. Owning him. His body is mine for the taking. He is mine. As I feel the first stirrings of my orgasm, I vaguely see Sasuke pulling himself off. I personally don’t care if the little fucker ever orgasms. I am not here for him. He is mine. I am not his. I know to whom I belong. A vision of Jiraiya flashes before my eyes and I cum violently- screaming my pleasure- viciously fucking Sasuke- fiercely loving Jira…

“Ahh…AHHH,” I scream as I cum.

‘This is fucking perfect.’

***Jiraiya’s World

When I hear Orochimaru’s scream, I know. I know I have to leave him. Any man that can make him scream like that gives Orochimaru exactly what he needs. I am not what he needs. Maybe I never was…he has never screamed like that for me. He has never lost his control like that for me.

My tears are no longer silent. I hear a low careening wail coming from my chest. I can’t stop it. My heart feels like it has stopped. My life- No, this life is over. My love has abandoned me.

The sounds from inside have halted.

‘Why didn’t he want me like that? Why is he never like that with me?’ I ask myself brokenly over and over again.

My wails are growing louder.

I don’t even bother to look away from the door I’d been staring at when it is flung open. Orochimaru stands in the doorway stark naked with an irritated expression. I can tell he was going to shout at the noisemaker, at me. I can see that his lips are poised to utter one of his favorite phrases, “Shut the fuck up!”

I don’t know who is more surprised. Him or me. I look past him to see an exhausted Sasuke smirking from the bed. Glorying in my hurt.

‘You won, Sasuke,’ I think to myself. ‘There is no need to be cruel.’

My eyes return to Orochimaru’s, which are admittedly blank. I can’t help but feel I am falling into them. They are such beautiful eyes after all. Golden and green. A hazel that can change from the color of jade to the golden brown of sunsets. But now, they are swallowing me whole. He is swallowing me whole; and I am too tired to fight it.

“Sasuke,” Orochimaru calls back into the room his eyes never leaving mine, “Get your shit together and get out.”

I barely notice what Sasuke does as I stare into Orochimaru’s eyes. Losing time. I don’t know how long we stand there like that. But I am snapped brutally back to the present when Sasuke passes between us, breaking our eye contact.

Orochimaru extends his hand to me. And something in me snapped.

“What?” I ask staring at the offending hand as if it were a snake ready to bite me, “What do you want me to do with that?”

“Come inside, Jira,” Orochimaru starts in a soothing voice, “Let me explain.”

***Orochimaru’s World

It seems to be taking Sasuke forever to go. It is taking all of my effort to keep Jiraiya captivated by my gaze. I learned this trick years ago at negotiating tables. I have learned how to mesmerize entire audiences of people. But it is taking all of my will power to keep Jiraiya’s gaze.

‘He is not a weak man,’ I think to myself with some pride. ‘I could never love a weak man.’

I know that if Jiraiya looks away from me again, he might leave. And if he leaves now, I may never see him again. The one thing that Jiraiya has always been good at is leaving. And if he doesn't want to be found, no one will ever be able to locate him. We’ve been separated for years when he is angry with me. But this time is different. I see it. I have never seen him like this. Wailing in an open hallway. This brokenness.

‘Ji, what have I done to you?’ I ask myself.

When Sasuke breaks our gaze, I know I have to act fast. So I extend my hand hoping to coax Jiraiya out of the hallway. I can still smell sex in the air. And though bringing Jiraiya into a hotel room that smells of sex between me and another man is not a good idea, staying out in this hallway is even worse. Jiraiya can bolt at any minute and I’ll never be able to catch him if he gets away.

I am not surprised to see Jiraiya recoil from my hand, his kind are always wary of offerings from people like me. We prey on Jiraiya’s type of people. But I love him.

“What?” Jiraiya exclaims with some bitterness, staring at my hand as if it is the most offensive object in the world. “What do you want me to do with that?”

I know that a show of aggression will only provoke Jira to make a scene or worse, leave.

“Come inside, Ji,” I say as soothingly as possible, “Let me explain.”

I knew if he were to catch me with Sasuke that he would not forgive me. At least not without some struggle. I know for a fact he will leave me again. When he leaves this hotel room, I will have no idea when I am going to see him again. But if he leaves like this, I will most certainly never see him again. I know Jiraiya too well not to know this about him. He is ready to bolt right now.

But I can’t stand the thought of him leaving forever. I have known all my life that I was going to die beside this man. In fact, he will probably be the one to kill me. I am the worse of society and he is the best. I am one of the most ruthless of criminals to be found and he is one of the loyal in law and order. Born into an organized family and him into a DEA family, we knew when we were young that we were headed opposite directions. He would be destined to capture or kill someone like me; and I would be destined to avoid and ‘remove’ someone like him.

Though we knew we were doomed, we have loved each other since we were 12. 37 years later, we still love each other. Unfortunately, we cannot live together either.

“Jira,” I say softly with my arm still extended. “I can explain.”

I know immediately my last sentence has provoked him by the flash of his eyes.

‘Shit.’

“You can explain!” Jiraiya starts with a mad glint in his eye. I watch him straighten up to his full 6’4 height. “You can explain why I just sat here and listened to you having sex with Sasuke. Better sex than you have ever had with me. You can explain that?” he concludes with a shout.

With the quickness of a snake, I grab one of Jiraiya’s arms and force him into the room before he has a chance to react. I need the security of having him behind closed doors. I need to block his path to running away with as many obstacles as possible. I cannot risk that he will get out of here and take one of his undercover missions. I will never be able to find him again.

As I fling him into the room, and quickly close the door. I lock it and settle the latch on the door.

I will not let him escape me.

***Jiraiya’s World

In knew the hand he was extending to me was just a trick to get me into the room. He’s always been sneaky that way. I bet he thinks I am going to run any minute now. And he’s right. He must also know that when I leave, I am never coming back. I cannot face this- this Sasuke thing. I cannot face losing what I never thought I could lose.

The thick smell of sex and the rumpled bed sheets all work together to remind me of what has happened here. Orochimaru has left me for another man. Anger, hurt, rage, and despair run through my body so that I cannot separate them. I am paralyzed with an overload of emotion that I cannot control.

‘I need to get out of here.’ I think as the walls begin to close in. I stand staring at the offensive bed with my back to Orochimaru. I don't want to see him. Naked and wearing stale signs of sex. I don’t want to see this.

I can feel my anger and rage melting away. I have never been one to hold onto such negative emotions. All I feel now is hurt and despair.

‘I need to get out of here.’

I feel arms enclose around me like steel from behind. I struggle, but I don't seem to have my usual strength. I drop to the ground to try to break the hold with my weight. But Orochimaru, as if predicting my actions, folded to the ground to counter my action. His legs close over mine with all the power kept in his body. And I know I am stuck. I have been in this position many times. When Orochimaru has me in this position his grip is like a vise, I will not be able to get up until he lets me.

“Are you ready to listen,” Orochimaru hisses in my ear. The strain of keeping me locked down like this is great. But I know for a fact he can keep this position all night. His willpower is no small thing.

“Do I have a choice?” I rasp, not even attempting to hide my bitterness.

“No.”

We wait in silence. My chest feels hollow as I eventually go completely limp in his arms.

‘I am too tired to fight.’ I think to myself.

“Say what you have to say. But then I’m leaving. No more, Orochimaru. No more.”

**** Orochimaru’s World

It takes everything I have not to show the panic his defeated words instill in me.

‘You can’t leave me, Ji. You can’t- not forever.’

I realize now that he is listening that I have no idea what to say. I have no idea what is going through Jiraiya’s mind about Sasuke. About what he heard. What I do know is his greatest fear is that I don’t love him enough. I have used this against him in the past, but now would be a good time to clear up this misconception.

“I don’t love him, Ji,” I start. When I hear his answering snort, I know I am on the right track. “I can’t love him. He is not you. I can only love you.”

I fall silent not really knowing what to say next. I know that Jiraiya doesn’t understand that sometimes sex can sometimes seem better than making love. The two aren’t comparable really. They both serve difference purposes, they cause different types of pleasure, satisfy different types of needs.

I have only ever made love to Jiraiya. I wouldn’t waste the little time we find together with having sex with him. He is the only one I can make love too. I can have sex with anybody. My love is only for Jiraiya.

“He’s just a fuck toy. A body that I need to make me feel young. To make this older body feel like it is new again. He’s just like the others, Ji. Not special.”

I know this line of reasoning is a risk. Jiraiya has never approved of my seemingly endless affairs. But he has understood them because he is away from me so much. His job demands it. But I have never flaunted a toy in front of him and I have never brought one of them to a bed that we have shared. Sasuke is different in this regard. I have violated all our unspoken rules with bringing him here.

So I know he will see the lie. And I am lying when I say he is not special to me at all. He is. I just don't love him and he won’t always be special to me…these kind of things never last.

“You’re lying,” Jiraiya whispers. I can hear the hurt in his voice as he continues, “He must be special or I would never have seen this. You fucked him today in a bed where you fucked me last night. I’m only here a week, Orochimaru,” he spits out with anger, “You couldn’t even wait for the week to end before you fucked him again.”

My heart clenches with agony.

‘I need you to understand,’ I beg internally, ‘Sasuke has nothing to do with you. He has everything to do with me.’

“It is not like that, Ji,” I try to counter calmly, beginning to hear the barest hint of my desperation spill into my voice, “I have never simply fucked you. I fuck Sasuke without any regard for his feelings or whether or not he is enjoying it. I give everything I have to you. I have never fucked you like that Ji. You are too special to me.”

“Yeah,” he begins with a soft sob, “I used to believe that too. But it is a lie. You made it a lie today.”

I feel wetness begin to form on my arm and I know they are Jiraiya’s tears. They burn through my arm. They set a fire running up my arm that is unbearable. I can feel myself losing him. I know that I am losing.

I do need Sasuke. But I can’t live without Jiraiya. I can’t. But I simply can’t give Sasuke up yet. Right now, he’s like my second chance at living. Jiraiya doesn’t know how deeply depressed I was before Sasuke. Looking over my life, all the fucked up, bad decisions I’ve made. Regretting every wrong turn. Missing my Ji. I was sinking fast and Jiraiya was nowhere to be found. Off on a mission in…God knows were. Sasuke was there. Sasuke offered to make it all go away and he can…for a time.

He has become my own whipping boy. A man that I can take all of my frustrations out on. Frustrations I would never burden Jiraiya with. Ji would never understand. But Sasuke does. And he is foolish enough to look at my actions toward him as training, when all I am doing is fucking my regrets out through him. How do I explain to Jiraiya that I need that. That I can’t give it up not yet, not even for him. Because I need a second soul, a second body, Sasuke is offering his…and I will take from him what I would never take from Ji. I love him too much for that. I won’t need Sasuke forever. But I need him right now. I need him.

Jiraiya’s voice breaks through my dazed musings.

“You have never given me all that you have to give,” he starts softly with quiet resignation. His sobs having subsided. “I heard you when you came, Orochimaru. I heard the love in your voice. I heard the need. You have never cried out for me that way. You don’t need me that way.”

*** Jiraiya’s World

I knew the moment the words left my mouth, my heart accepted the truth. It was over. Orochimaru doesn’t know it yet, but I know I cannot return to this man. I cannot be valued second under Sasuke. I cannot live that way.

I feel Orochimaru’s arms tighten making it hard for me to breath. I don’t fight. I welcome death. Walking away from him is going to kill me anyway. I am not going to survive this.

“Don’t say that,” Orochimaru whispers burying his head in my hair. “I have never loved anyone but you. Never.”

“Not until now, Oro,” I state simply, “Not until now.”

“Not even now, damn it! Listen to me, I don’t love that bastard. I need him right now. I need the stability he brings to me, right now. But I won’t always. By the time you come back- when you come back, he won’t even be around.”

I give a soft smile at Orochimaru’s deliberate obtuseness. ‘He never has known himself very well.’

“Oh, Oro,” I start unable to disguise the devastation I feel or the peace beginning to settle in my soul as I realize what I must do, “Do you remember the days when I used to keep you stable? After we would make love you would whisper how much you needed me to keep grounded. I knew I was the only one for you. I knew no matter who you were with, who you had to be or what you were forced to do for your Family, I knew all of that was always going to be second to me. I never made you choose, because there was no choice. But today you showed me that I am second to someone else. I am not enough for you anymore. Someone else keeps you stable.”

I know he is panicking. You can’t have known someone for almost 45 years without knowing when they are falling apart. I know Orochimaru still loves me. Just not like he used to; not like I love him. I see no point in leaving the obvious unstated.

“You and I both know that when I leave here I am never coming back,” I say softly, not knowing why I am trying to soften the blow of my departure. It is not as if he deserves such kindness. But I can’t stop loving him because he has learned to love another more.

To my surprise I feel him lift me up in his arms and throw me to the ground so that he can straddle me. His hands painfully pulling my hair- pinning me to the floor- as his legs move to clasp my waist in another death grip.

I look up into his angry flashing eyes. I see the fear. I see the panic. I even see the love. But it is not enough. It will never be enough again.

“You cannot leave me over, Sasuke, Ji,” Orochimaru growls glaring at me and begging me to understand at the same time. “He is just a passing fancy.”

I raise my now free arm so that I can trail my fingertips through his hair. I have always loved his hair.

“I can and I will,” I state plainly.

This time I am ready for the explosion.

“NO, goddamn you! NO. You don't understand. Just listen-”

“I heard everything you said,” I interrupt. “Now, it is time for you to listen to me. Here is the situation you find yourself in. On the one hand, we both know that the only way you are going to be able to keep me is if I never leave this city. Because I am never coming back here if I get away. This hurts too much. And, we both know, in order to keep me here, you are going to have to give up Sasuke. You cannot keep me here by force. I have to want to stay. And we both know, I refuse to come second to anyone. Especially not some 23 year old kid.”

*** Orochimaru’s World

I feel every part of me tremble with anger and fear.

‘I am not ready to choose.’ I think to myself.

The feel of his hand in my hair is confusing. He knows the way he strokes my hair always manages to calm me down. And no matter how much I struggle to keep my edge, I can feel him gentling me. I can’t resist it. I have never been able to resist what he wants from me. Until now.

“You mean I have to-” I break off, unable to continue.

“Choose,” Jiraiya finishes with a knowing look in his still hurt eyes.

“I-” I start, but cannot continue. I can’t choose. I can’t. I need Sasuke. He is my only hope for surviving my past. But I love Jiraiya. He is all I ever hoped for; all I’ve ever wanted.

In my life, I have only ever been allowed what I have needed for survival. My life in the Family is a necessity. My actions in the past were all of necessity. Even Sasuke is a necessity. Jiraiya’s different. He is a desire, a want. The only thing in my life I have ever gotten that I actually wanted. He makes everything I have to do to survive worth it. I need to know he loves me. That he is coming back to me. I am untouchable because of him. I stay alive by any means necessary, because he is always coming back…I promised him a long time ago I would stay alive so he can find me.

I have done horrible things to survive because of that pledge. He is the reason I am still alive; and in a twisted way, he is also the reason I need Sasuke. I need Sasuke to survive for him. So I will be here when he comes back... And he has to come back! It will all have been for nothing. What will I do if he doesn’t come back? What will happen to me? What will happen to Jiraiya!?

It shocks me to feel tears drip down my cheeks. I can't remember the last time I cried.

I feel Jiraiya’s hand move to wipe my tears.

“It’s ok,” he whispers, “You don’t have to say it out loud. I knew who you would choose when we were out in the hallway.”

“I can’t choose,” I cry softly. No matter who I choose I am going to lose him. And either way I am going to lose myself.

“Shh,” Jiraiya sooths staring at me with big sad eyes, “Sometimes not choosing is a choice.”

“I don’t want him forever, Ji. Please, believe me. Please,” I beg. I have never begged anything of anyone. And I am so ashamed to begging Jiraiya now, especially when I know it won’t do any good. Jiraya does not respond to pleas from the guilty...what loyal, lawman does?

He shushes me again and says, “People like you don’t beg. My Orochimaru never begs. Not for anyone, least of all for an old, ex-lover like me.”

“Don’t leave me,” I say- trying not to beg.

I am losing the only man I have ever loved enough to be vulnerable in front of, how am I not supposed to beg the only man who I don’t mind begging? I will never be able to find this again. I can never have this with Sasuke. Never. We simply do not have that kind of relationship. Why can’t Jiraiya see that?

‘I’ll make him see it,’ I think wildly.

***Jiraiya’s World

I don’t have much time before Orochimaru loses all common sense. When he is backed into a corner he usually comes out attempting to control the universe. I wouldn’t put it past him to hold me captive.

So I better take in this moment now. It is our last moment together. Staring into his golden, unhappy eyes, red now that he has shed tears, I pledge to myself to never forget how he looks right now. 'He will always be beautiful to me.'

“I love you,” I whisper, “I always will.”

The hope that sparks in his eye breaks my heart further.

I know he will never understand my decision to leave. He compartmentalizes so much of his life. I am sure in his mind Sasuke is very different than me. I am sure he thinks that I should just let him get Sasuke out of his system, and then he will come back to me. But Sasuke is just a symptom. There will be other Sasuke's in the future. I am not enough for Orochimaru anymore. He needs more than my love. Unfortunately, all I have to offer is my love, because neither one of us can fit into each other’s lives.

“I love you, Ji, forever. It is supposed to be me and you forever, remember? We made that pledge so long ago,” Oro says with a passion that doesn’t even come close the tumultuous passion he displayed for Sasuke.

“I know. But I’ve said it before Oro. A snake may love a toad, but they can never find peace with each other. It is against their nature...it is against our nature to live together in peace.”

As I watch the emotions and denial flash across his face, for a second I almost doubt my conviction to leave. But I know what must be done. I am alive today because I trust my gut. And it is clear to me what I must do. I must do the right thing and allow Orochimaru to find the happiness of his kind. The happiness of snakes. The kind of happiness that I cannot provide.

“I’m sorry,” I say as I cuff him on the side of his head knocking him out instantly with a surprise punch.

As he falls limply on over my chest, I wrap my arms around him quickly to keep him from falling off of me. But the minute I move to bury my nose in his hair, I smell the acrid scent of drying sweat. The sweat he shed fucking Sasuke. I do not want to remember these last moments according to the smell of his exertions with another man.

I immediately sit up trying to maneuver Orochimaru so that I can carry him and deposit him on the bed.

I place him on the bed as gently as I can. When I stand back, I realize the last sight I will have of him will be of him lying on a bed rumpled by his affair with another man. It is an appropriate picture, I suppose. It is an image that will allow me to stick to my convictions. I will never return.

I heave a shuddering sigh as I think to myself, ‘life sucks.’

After kissing him one last time on his lips, those lips that used to be mine, I turn and stalk out of the room.

I don’t look back. I don’t stop. I don’t slow down, not even when I pass Sasuke sitting by the elevators, presumably, waiting for me to leave.

I growl at him and watch his eyes glaze over with feigned indifference. But I can’t resist this last warning, “Take care of him.”

I don’t wait to hear Sasuke’s response as I head for the stairs. I don’t think I can wait for the elevator and still leave.

I chant to myself, ‘It’s for the best’ as I leave behind the only man I have ever loved. The man who still has my soul in his possession. I know my days are number. I probably will not survive my next mission. There is no reason to survive. Orochimaru's gone.


*** Orochimaru’s World

I shoot out of sleep shouting, “Jiraiya don’t!”

Looking around the hotel room frantically searching for Jiraiya. I see Sasuke sitting across from me in one of the suite’s chairs.

“Where is he?” I snarl.

With a slight shrug of his shoulders, he responds, “I don’t know. He left about 2 hours ago.”

My mind quickly calculates the time passed. Two hours? I turn to check the clock, realizing it has been at least two hours. That’s when it hits me, Jiraiya is gone. Long gone.

My world unravels. Someone is screaming. I am screaming. My arm burns where I felt Jiraiya's tears. I know that this arm will never feel the same again. It will burn as long as I am alive.

I feel hands reach for me. I struggle against them. They are not Jiraiya’s hands.

“Get your fucking hands off of me,” I shout as I try push Sasuke away.

“Old man,” Sasuke snarls in my ear as he wrestles to pin me down to the bed, “We both know, you are nothing without Jiraiya. I am your life now. I have your power. I own you and everything you own is mine.”

Sasuke begins to wrap his body around mine so tightly that I begin to lose all connection with the outside world. It is as if he is taking me into himself. Making me part of him.

I don’t fight. There is no reason to fight. No reason to survive anymore. Jiraiya’s gone.

Epilogue Next