Goodbye My Almost Lover

Author: ME!
Pairing: Jiraiya/Naruto
Rating: NC-17
Summary: Naruto is mourning the ending of a relationship he thought would become love. And in the meantime gets shown that someone else truly and always has loved him.
Disclaimer: I don’t own Naruto Characters or the Song. If I did I’d be rich.
Now on to the story!
****


He sat there in the same spot he’d sat in his childhood. Here he was 18 and still alone and still without someone who truly loved him. He’d really thought that he and Sasuke had had something special. Oh he wasn’t in love with Sasuke, but he’d though he’d finally have someone who loved him. Instead, he was alone again.
Naruto sighed and rested his head against the rope that held the swing. This was the third person he’d tried to get close to, and the third person to toss him aside for someone else. Even now, after he had proved himself over and over again, no one really wanted him.
He wiped at his damp eyes before closing them, he started humming quietly, then started singing softly.

“Your fingertips across my skin
The palm trees swaying in the wind
Images
You sang me Spanish lullabies
The sweetest sadness in your eyes
Clever trick
Well I never want to see you unhappy
I thought you'd want the same for me.”

Sniffing softly his voice trembled as he tried to continue his song.

“We walked along a crowded street
You took my hand and danced with me
Images
And when you left, you kissed my lips
You told me you would never, never forget
These images
Well I never want to see you unhappy
I thought you'd want the same for me”

His voice cracked on the last verse and he started to sob quietly, not realizing there was a person watching from a nearby tree, heart breaking for the young man sitting there, singing and crying his heart out. Naruto wrapped his arms around himself and after taking a shaky breath, continued singing. The person watching from the shadows felt his own heart break and wanted nothing more then to take his ray of sunshine into his arms and sooth all the pain and heartbreak. He knew how much Naruto yearned for nothing more then someone to love him. And he did, oh how he loved the blond, but he’d distanced himself, not wanting to get too close.

“I cannot go to the ocean
I cannot drive the streets at night
I cannot wake up in the morning
Without you on my mind
So you're gone and I'm haunted
And I bet you are just fine
Did I make it that
Easy to walk right in and out
Of my life?”

Naruto stood up and looked up into the sky, he knew the reason he was so disposable. It was because he always acted like an idiot and like he was always happy. He’d been doing it his whole life, shoving his emotions away and not letting himself feel them. His mask was perfect, almost, only one person had seen through his mask but he was gone now too.
He shivered slightly, he really was alone now, his pervy sage was gone, the only person he felt did care for him. Although he admitted, not how he really WANTED to be cared about. He jerked, startled as he was swept up into a tender embrace, but relaxed realizing who it was.
He however wasn’t expecting to be pulled into an extremely gentle and dare he hope, loving kiss. He opened his mouth and allowed the seeking tongue entrance, the hands carding through his hair were extraordinarily gentle. As the kiss ended Naruto buried himself further into the man’s chest.
“Why?” he asked the man softly.
“You are loved little one, don’t ever doubt that." Jiraiya frowned, seeing the slight unbelieving look cross Naruto's delicate features and swore inwardly. He silently damned the entire village and Kakashi. He's seen the way Naruto had strived to get Kakashi's approval just to be shot down over and over.
He pulled Naruto into another soft kiss, trying to convey through his lips his feelings for the blond. He threaded his fingers into the silken locks. It had been so long since he’d felt anything remotely close to this.
Naruto was in Heaven, the one he’d secretly been pining for loved him. He sighed as the kiss was broken again, another soft kiss pressed to his forehead.
“I’m going to show you just how much you are loved.” Jiraiya whispered and scooped up the blond and quickly made his way to where he was staying. Even as he walked he carded his hands through the blonde’s hair.
Naruto was trying to believe that he was loved, but after 17 years of seeing and even being told different he was having a hard time truly believing it in his heart. He buried his face into the older man’s neck, smiling he pressed a soft kiss into the juncture of Jiraiya's neck and shoulder. He snickered when he felt the hand in his hair still.
They reached their destination quickly and Jiraiya didn’t even pause, taking Naruto to the bedroom and putting him on the bed, he then covered the lithe body with his own, sliding slowly up Naruto’s body, he stopped and simply stared into the cerulean orbs.
“I love you little one.” He whispered and then pressed another kiss to the petal soft lips. He slowly began divest Naruto of his clothes, while keeping him distracted with tender, sweet kisses and nips along his neck.
Naruto had never felt anything like he was feeling at that moment, he had read about sex between two guys, but he’d never even imagined what was being done to him would feel this good. He jumped slightly when a soft hand trailed down to his stomach and traced the seal there. He knew then that this was meant to be, Jiraiya was the only person he would ever feel comfortable enough with to let the seal be touched. He tugged on the pervert’s clothes, but was frustrated when he couldn’t get his hands to cooperate.
“Off!” He whined, giving his best kicked puppy face. He smiled in triumph when a soft chuckle echoed his request and he watched as his Jiraiya slowly started peeling off his clothing.
Naruto stared, mouth slightly agape as he watched his soon to be lover strip, oh yeah he’d seen him without clothing before but he’d never noticed that particular tattoo that was just below Jiraiya’s collar bone on the left. Sitting, he looked closer it almost looked like a few elements of the Kyuubi’s seal. He looked up questioningly into the dark eyes watching him close.
“It was a promise I made to myself, I would protect you with my life, no matter what.” Jiraiya whispered softly.
Naruto tried to keep the tears at bay, but his eyes watered, he leapt at the man and clung to him. He had to admit he liked the sensation of bare chest on bare chest, he leaned up and planted a kiss on the other’s lips, signaling he was ready to continue.
Once again he was laid down on the bed, he was slightly nervous, but the smile Jiraiya sent his way calmed him. As his pants were stripped off of him, he noticed the almost hungry gleam in his pervy sage’s eyes. He blushed as the man’s eyes fell on his hard cock, but that blush was forgotten when his length was engulfed in a wet heat. He clenched his eyes shut and gave a harsh moan, the man had a magic mouth.
Jiraiya smirked around his mouthful and after making sure his finger was completely covered in lube slowly began teasing his way to the very inviting looking pucker. He swallowed the thick erection in his mouth and sucked hard as he slowly worked his finger into the tight heat. He pulled back so only the heavy head of Naruto’s heavy prick rested in his mouth and moaned.
‘Kami, how tight can he be!’ He thought to himself, he pulled off of Naruto’s member with a small pop. He looked at Naruto who had his eyes closed and head tilted back and carefully withdrew his finger and after re-lubing slowly worked in the first finger, followed by the second. He noticed the wince on Naruto’s face and slowly began pressing kisses to the inside of his thigh. He smiled when he found a place that when he suckled just right made Naruto whine and press his backside into the probing fingers.
Jiraiya crooked his fingers and was rewarded in his quest when Naruto gasped sharply.
Naruto was seeing stars, “What the hell was THAT!” He gasped and arched, shoving himself down on the fingers as they found that special spot again.
Jiraiya chuckled into the golden thigh, “That is your prostate.” he said and leered at Naruto. He continued to tease Naruto, taking him to the edge and then pulling back in the last moment.
Naruto was frustrated, he was rock hard and leaking, tears of frustration were starting to seep from his clenched eyelids. He almost sobbed when the fingers were taken away. He felt so empty, so alone.
“Oh Little One,” Jiraiya whispered.
Suddenly a hard heavy body pressed on top of his and soft lips kissed away his tears.
“I’m not leaving, love, but I need to make sure you want this.”
Naruto stared up into the dark eyes and smiled, “I love you, and I want you and only you.” He whispered hoarsely.
Jiraiya nodded and sat back, reaching for the jar of lube. He was almost trembling, he wanted so bad to bury himself into that tight heat in one shove. But he would NOT hurt his sunshine, he wouldn’t betray Naruto’s trust like that. He slowly slicked up his hard cock and smiled as Naruto watched.
He shifted Naruto’s legs to his shoulders and very slowly pressed in.
Naruto gasped and then flinched as the head of a very thick prick was slowly filling him. He whimpered slightly at the sharp ripping pain that filled him.
Jiraiya stopped and slowly and tenderly kissed Naruto’s calf. He reached down and slowly began to pump Naruto’s waning erection.
Inch by slow agonizing inch Jiraiya encased himself in the gripping, agonizing tight heat. When he was fully sheathed he stopped and breathed deeply trying to get control of himself and let Naruto adjust.
Naruto sighed when he felt the pain ease and nodded to his lover. The first shallow thrust made him gasp, but this time in pleasure. He wasn’t sure but he thought he heard a snicker somewhere in the back of his mind but he tuned that out.
Soon both men were lost in each other, lost in the movement, the only sounds in the room was the slap of skin against skin and breathy moans and grunts.
Jiraiya was reaching his breaking point and reached down and grabbed Naruto’s leaking member and began to pump it in time with his thrusts.
“JIRAIYA!!!!” Naruto screamed harshly as he came hard. Jiraiya followed with a grunt. Naruto felt warmness spread throughout his insides.
Jiraiya gently put Naruto’s legs down and bent and kissed his lover deeply. He pulled out very slowly and gently, so not to hurt Naruto.
“Are you ok?” He asked looking into the beautiful soulful eyes of his Naruto.
Naruto shifted slightly and nodded after a light wince, “Just sticky.” He said softly. He watched at Jiraiya got up and disappeared into the bathroom for a moment returning clean and with a warm clothe. He sighed as the older man gentle and tenderly cleaned him. Paying close attention to his backside and checking for blood, but Naruto felt wonderful.
“I’m fine Pervy sage, Kyuubi has already healed me,” Naruto reached for his lover motioning he wanted him to lay beside him.
Jiraiya smiled, as if he was going to leave. He laid down and pulled Naruto to his chest, entwining their legs, he pressed a kiss into the soft hair.
“I love you Naruto, forever.”
He smiled when he noticed Naruto was already asleep. He relaxed and was pulled into a deep sleep himself.

***
Naruto smiled as he sat down with his ramen, he glanced up to see Sasuke walk in with Sakura on his arm. It didn’t bother him at all and he waved excitedly to them, snickering internally when he saw the Teme’s curious face.
It had been 3 days since his first night with Jiraiya, and 3 perfect days of being loved. Even if they were apart in the daytime the Pervert was with him every night. And he KNEW he was loved.
“Hey Sakura-chan! Teme! Have a good day!”
He left the ramen stand with a bright true smile on his face. He was loved. He completely missed the bewildered faces of his two ex-teammates.

Goodbye, my almost lover
Goodbye, my hopeless dream
I'm trying not to think about you
Can't you just let me be?
So long, my luckless romance
My back is turned on you
Should have known you'd bring me heartache
Almost lovers always do