Love Me Dead

Title: “Love Me Dead”
Author: antilogicgirl
Series: Naruto
Rating: R-18 for language and sexual references
Pair: Naruto/Sasuke

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A/N: Oh, God. A one-shot. What’s the world coming to? I can’t seem to do anything with the stories I’ve got, but you can’t let the writing muscles atrophy, right? So here you go. A story based on the lyrics of Ludo’s Love Me Dead. Lyrics are posted after the epilogue portion. Refer to them if you want to understand the inspiration for this. Fear not. This ain’t no song-fic. I’m well past that phase.

Feed the review beast. It is hungry.

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“Love Me Dead”

Part I: Noodle Thief at 2:30am

From the online journal of mr_blu_eyes:

Ever hear the phrase, ‘love hurts’? I think that maybe they meant that old saying for me. Why the hell else would I have ended up like this? A sniveling, begging mess that would do anything to keep something that’s killing me. That’s what I am. Guess maybe I should pull the plug…but I can’t. Does that make me a glutton for punishment? Maybe.

You’re probably wondering what in the blue blazes I’m talking about, right? Well. Let me enlighten you.

About six weeks ago, I met this guy in the all-night grocery store. It was the pasta and crackers aisle, about two thirty in the morning, and I was exhausted. Having earned nothing more than a pounding headache at the bar—I own a bar, did I mention that?—I just wanted to grab some soba, a bottle of aspirin, and a six-pack of beer. Then, I could go home, have a bite to eat, drink a beer and take the aspirin…go to sleep, and be done with it. Right about now would be a good time to bring up another one of those old sayings. This one is ‘Fate’s a bitch’. Oh, yeah. A mega-bitch.

I’d grabbed one of those hand-baskets on the way in, and made a beeline for the painkillers. Now, all that was left was the beer and noodles. There was always Ramen, but I do get tired of it sometimes. Living off of the stuff for ten years will definitely do that to you. But, as they say, I digress. In the pasta and crackers aisle, I headed for where I knew the soba was. Before I could grab the very last packet, someone else got there first.

Curses…

When I followed that pale arm upward, I was just sort of gaping up at a guy that looked—and let me just warn you now, unless you see him, you don’t get the full effect—like he’d just had some really wild and possibly debilitating sex. He had black hair that was just mussed enough that it might have been intentional, but you got the impression that it wasn’t. Maybe it was just me, or maybe he really had the daylights screwed out of him just before he ruined my morning…but that’s neither here nor there.

Anyway, he was staring at me with this really intense look on his face, like he saw something he wanted in a way that did not bode well. Not at all. “Oh,” he said in this dark, God-awfully sexy dangerous voice, “did you want this?” A second or two later, I picked up on the fact that he was talking about the noodles, and that’s when I started getting embarrassed. You don’t really need me to tell you what I thought he meant…I’m sure you’re smart enough to figure that out for yourself.

“Um…I can just g-go and grab some Ramen…” I was trying to back away, but it’s still unclear whether my feet didn’t move, or if he followed. “R…really…I d-don’t need—“ Scratch that. He was really following. My back hit a display of Fritos, knocking half of the barbeque-flavored chips off of the rack. Why was he so close?

He smelled like…ginger and molasses, and I was having a hard time not being affected by two of my favorite smells at the same time. Really, I was. And then, he spoke again, and I almost fainted. “I know what you need.” After he dropped the noodles into his own basket, he reached behind him. He pulled a Sharpie from his pocket, then took hold of my hand—the one not holding a basket—and started writing on palm. The guy let go of my hand, and walked away.

What the holy hell?!

All I could do was stare as he walked away. How could I have been so preoccupied with his face that I didn’t notice his body? The son-of-a-bitch was wearing the tightest pair of leather pants I’ve ever seen. Not to mention the fact that he had on a red t-shirt that had written across the back in large white letters ‘WET DREAM’. All that, packaging what had to be the leanest, deadliest body I could have imagined in my dreams. Wet dream indeed.

No shit, Sherlock.

He looked over his shoulder. It was one of those looks, but it didn’t say ‘come hither’ so much as it did ‘I dare you’. Smirking just a little, he said, “That address, one hour.” I looked down at my hand. Sure enough, he’d written an address on my hand. An address, and a name.

1-19 Minamiyama Temachi
#305
Sasuke

So I asked myself, as he disappeared around the corner…did that really just happen? Then, I figured that judging from the minor erection, the address on my hand, and the barely-there smell of ginger and molasses, it did happen. My mind had just kind of locked up there, for a minute. No one had ever done that before. In fact, I couldn’t remember the last time I’d actually gotten laid, let alone been propositioned by a complete stranger without provocation.

Needless to say, my headache was completely forgotten. I set down my basket on the floor, and went across the store to get the beer I mentioned earlier. On second thought, I grabbed a small bottle of plum wine.

It took only fifteen minutes to get to the address that was still written on my hand. For the next forty minutes, I sat on a bench in front of the Ana Hotel, drinking and debating if I should even go across the street. The Ana stood opposite a western-style apartment building, all brick and wrought iron. All lights were off, with the exception being one window on the third floor, which I could only assume was number 305.

Finally, when I’d drunk the last of the wine, I figured it might do me some good if I went up. After all, the staff at the bar was starting to act like I’d bite their heads off at any moment. Maybe I was a little on edge. Maybe.

The stairs were steep, and by the time I rang the buzzer, I was out of breath. Now, I laugh. Out of breath, my ass. No, I lost any ability to breathe at all when the door opened, and there was Sasuke, buck-naked and looking annoyed. “What took you so long?” he grumped, “I thought you weren’t going to show up…” That was when I realized he was naked for a reason. He’d started without me.

Now, don’t get me wrong. The sex is amazing. But I’m getting tired of how that’s all he wants from me. I hate it. The whole damned thing, really. He pushes me out, and away before I can get any closer. It’s like…scratch that. I fucking know I’m an idiot, because I let myself fall for him.

Damn it…I’m a weak, weak man.

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Part II: Hate You, Love You

“Coming!” Naruto shut his laptop, and ran a hand through his hair. It wasn’t like it did any good, really, but Sasuke stressed him out about his appearance. Jumping up from the chair he sat in, he ran to the door. It took a moment or two to unfasten all four locks, but he managed it more quickly than he would have if he’d known it was anyone other than Uchiha Sasuke. Over the squeal of the hinge, he heard blood rushing in his ears. Not sure if it was agitation, fear, or joy, he watched as the epitome of evil and beauty came into view.

Today, evil wore white. Sasuke leaned against the doorjamb, a white sweater and pale tan suede pants that looked soft to the touch clinging to planes of muscle and sinew. Naruto swallowed hard. He hated how this man reduced him to little more than a ball of need, begging and writhing, and all for his amusement. Then, it was no more Mr. Nice Guy. Oh, he let Naruto come, all right. But the human body could only produce so much semen, and Sasuke was addicted to it. He needed it. Their first night together, he’d confessed as much. He needed the way it filled him, the way it tasted in his mouth. He needed the way it felt as it cooled on his skin.

“Hello,” came the dark-eyed man’s voice, liquid seduction for the ears, creeping into Naruto’s mind and erasing any memory of how he’d been unable to move for six hours after the last time Sasuke had come over. “How are you feeling?” This question was asked with a ghost of a smile, sending tingling feeling through Naruto’s body. He always asked how Naruto was feeling. It wasn’t that he was concerned, except that if the blonde wasn’t feeling well, there would be no sex. And that was why he kept coming back.

“I’m okay. Took a nap earlier, had some lunch. Gotta go to work at nine, so I had to get sleep some time.” Stepping aside, Naruto, motioned the other man into the door.

“Naruto,” a heavy whisper sounded close to his ear, “call in sick.” A hand snaked around his body, sliding down his stomach, into his lounge pants and immediately gripped his already-forming erection. “Please.” That was not a question. Sasuke never asked. He demanded, bullied, and threatened, but never asked. What might sound to an untrained ear like a request was actually an order. And God forbid any one of Sasuke’s ‘requests’ went unfulfilled. That would provoke retribution that Naruto did not wish to think about.

The one and only time he had refused to do something Sasuke wanted of him, he had ended up chained to his own kitchen table—where the chains came from, he had no idea—with a rather large vibrator shoved in a place where he’d prefer it not to be. It was revved up to full speed, and angled expertly to stimulate his prostate gland while Sasuke rode him, forcing him to orgasm no less than five times before he blacked out from the combination of pain and searing pleasure. When he woke up, Sasuke had thrown him onto his bed and left the door unlocked.

It was not unusual for Naruto to wake up and find that Sasuke had gone. After all, once Naruto was completely spent, he could not perform for at least two days. That meant the black-eyed menace would have to either masturbate, or find another outlet for his requirements. The knowledge that Sasuke actually did do these things with other people came early on. It had been two weeks after they’d met.

Naruto knocked briskly on Sasuke’s door. He’d gotten a call earlier, which he’d missed, from Sasuke. The message asked that he come over immediately, as it was very important. About four hours after the message had been left, Naruto listened to it, and was concerned. He rushed over to the other man’s apartment, and knocked on the door. It took no less than five minutes before the door opened.

He was not sure if he should be disgusted or aroused when Sasuke answered the door. As usual, the Uchiha was stark naked, but unlike the other times Naruto had been over, he was not alone. A large, muscular man sat at the foot of the bed, watching something on the television and masturbating furiously. Sasuke fixed him with a cool gaze, and said, “You should answer your phone, Naruto.” Then, his head tilted to one side. Something that looked slightly hopeful entered those dark eyes when he suggested, “You can join us, if you like.”

Another look at the man on the bed decided for him. “I’ll pass.”

Now, as he was steered away from the entry hall of his apartment, stumbling because of their awkward positioning, he felt his resolve crumble once again. But one image stuck in his head. The sight of that man in Sasuke’s bed not only left him feeling disgusted, but Naruto also felt bitter, and angry. He felt betrayed. Nothing had ever been mentioned about exclusivity between them, but he’d always been an all-or-nothing kind of guy. The memory of that day burned in him, and he felt the anger boil up inside him once again.

In an unprecedented display of will, Naruto grabbed Sasuke’s wrist, squeezing until his hold slackened, and pulled the hand out of his pants. He twisted around, and used this motion to pin Sasuke against the wall.

“Fuck!” the pale man yelled when his face hit the wall. “What do you think you’re doing, Naruto?”

Pulling the arm he had a good grip on, he leaned a greater portion of his weight onto Sasuke. “Let’s see how you like it.” The trapped man tried to squirm, to protest, to ask him what on earth he was talking about, but Naruto would have none of it. “I’m sick and tired of being at your mercy. Now, you’re gonna see how it feels. Understand?” Sasuke’s body was beginning to tremble, but Naruto was unsure why. He couldn’t be afraid. “Damn it, Sasuke, answer me.”

Another tug on Sasuke’s arm drew a pained squeak, but he agreed. In a strained voice , and spoken through clenched teeth, he said, “Fine! Just let my arm go.” He was released, and then turned. Pale cheeks were beginning to turn red in sudden shame. “What do you want me to do?” Sasuke sounded miserable. Naruto had known for a while now that even though his lover was always on the receiving end, he was a control junkie, just as certainly as he was also a nymphomaniac.

“Nothing.”

Dark eyes blinked in confusion. “I’m sorry?”

Naruto repeated himself, “I don’t want you to do anything. Just let me do all of the work.” An attempted protest was stalled before it could really get going. Naruto shoved the other man until his back was against the wall. Pressing his face close, he growled, “What you do is use me, Sasuke. You use me just like you do your vibrator. All I’m there for is to get you off. It just so happens that for you to do that, I have to come at least three times, but if that weren’t included in your kink, I’m pretty sure I’d either have the worst case of blue-balls the world has ever seen, or my right arm would be a lot more buff than my left. Now, if you try to do anything without my permission, I’ll tie you up. Got it?”

“Yes.”

“Good.” Naruto reached up and grabbed a handful of black hair. “Now…I don’t recall you letting me kiss you.” It was true. Any time he’d ever tried to come near those lips, Sasuke had turned his head, or distracted him. Black eyes were wide, and Sasuke was trying to push himself into the wall. “What’s wrong?” Naruto asked, recognizing fear for what it was. There was a good deal of fear behind Sasuke’s eyes now. “What are you scared of?”

Suddenly, the fear was gone, replaced with anger. Sasuke’s chin rose defiantly, his eyes hardening to black ice. “Just shut up and fuck me, you idiot. That’s why I came here.”

Blue eyes narrowed. What the hell? Something was going on…something he had not notice before. Naruto decided then and there that he was going to get to the bottom of what was going on in Sasuke’s fucked-up mind. Again, he yanked on the man’s hair, jerking his head backward. Leaning close to the shell of Sasuke’s ear, he whispered dangerously, “I think…not.”

“What—“

His hand tightened in Sasuke’s hair, and drew a hiss of pain from the other’s mouth. “No talking unless I ask you a direct question.” When he released the hair he’d been holding, Naruto clenched Sasuke’s upper arm, using this grip to drag him further into the apartment. He pushed the captive man down onto the couch, and stood over him, arms crossed over his chest. “Now, you’re going to follow my instructions to the letter, or I’ll make it so that you don’t enjoy yourself at all when I finally do fuck you. Is that clear?”

Sasuke remained silent for a long moment, simply staring up at Naruto with his mouth hanging open and a look of utter disbelief on his face. Finally, he looked away and muttered, “Fine.”

“Excellent,” the blonde man said, cocking his head to one side. “Tell me, Sasuke. Why won’t you let me kiss you?” He watched carefully for any physical cues that would let him know whether the seated man was being truthful or not. But other than a slight stiffening of his shoulders, Sasuke betrayed nothing. He also did not answer Naruto’s question. “Answer the question.” Silence ensued, and lasted for a full minute, during which Naruto became progressively angrier. “Answer me!” He cried, his voice rising to a shouting volume.

Sasuke’s voice came then, barely audible, “Because I don’t want…”

Naruto didn’t hear the rest of what he’d been trying to say. He trailed off in the middle of that thought. “You don’t want what? Am I disgusting or something? Sorry to burst your bubble, psycho. If you ain’t got my cooties yet, there’s no way to get ‘em.”

Dark eyes flashed for an instant. “Fuck you, Uzumaki. I’m not going to tell you a damned thing.” Sasuke crossed his arms over his chest and leaned back against the couch.

“Why are you being so goddamned stubborn? I just want a simple answer to a simple question. You owe me that much, you son of a bitch. Six weeks ago, I was fine. Now, I don’t know what the hell’s going on. You fuck me, but you won’t kiss me. You come over here, use me, and leave. If all I was to you was a way to get sex, this would have been over a long time ago. Hell, I’ve seen form myself the fact that I’m not the only one you’re fucking.” Naruto was leaning down into Sasuke’s face now. “All I want to know is why.”

“Why what?” Sasuke sneered, tilting his head back and glaring up at him. “You’re putting a hell of a lot out there, and not really asking the right questions. What exactly are you getting at?”

His eyes narrowed to thin slits of blue as he pressed even closer, now feeling hot breath across his mouth. “There are a lot of things that I want to know. First, just tell me why you don’t want to kiss me.”

Sasuke’s face took on a blank look. “I don’t have to put up with this.”

“Really?” Naruto asked, his tone edging up on dangerous.

“Really.” Sasuke sounded pretty confident about that, but his eyes said something different.

“Then why are you still sitting there?” Naruto knew he was smiling now. He had Sasuke exactly where he wanted him.

“Gragh!” Sasuke yelled suddenly, throwing his hands up in obvious frustration and causing Naruto to stumble backward. “God damn it!” Now on his feet, the dark-eyed man glared down at Naruto. “How fucking stupid are you? Why am I still here? For fuck’s sake, Naruto…I thought you’d have figured it out by now.” Naruto blinked, completely flabbergasted at this sudden outburst. “No? Well, let me answer all your questions, then. First of all, it isn’t that I don’t want to kiss you. The problem is that I do want to kiss you. And I don’t kiss. Not ever. You asked me what I’m afraid of? I’m goddamned fucking scared to death of what’s happening every time I see you.”

Naruto watched with a vague sense of wonder as the taller man drew near. “I don’t do relationships, and I don’t do monogamy. But when you left that day, when I had someone else over, I went ahead and fucked him, but it was your name I screamed. That night in the grocery store, I knew there was something different about you. Against my better judgment, I went up to you. And now look where it leaves me!”

“Where does it leave you?” Naruto blurted suddenly, the need to know the answer to that question overwhelming him.

Huffing irritatedly, Sasuke growled, “Here, that’s where! Standing in front of you, not wanting anything other than to kiss you, not caring if sex results. Wanting your arms around me, just holding me, and knowing that I could stay that way for hours. This isn’t me!”

Naruto couldn’t breathe. Everything was now so clear that he felt like even more of a moron than usual. He supposed that it was because Sasuke always left, and never really spent any time with him outside of getting him into bed, but he’d completely missed the fact that the other man had apparently fallen for him. Well, he thought, this un-complicates things a bit. The only problem now was getting the bastard to admit that he felt the same way Naruto did.

“Come here,” Naruto said quietly, moving as close as possible and slipping his arms around Sasuke’s neck. “This?” he asked, “This is what you want?”

The taller man stiffened. “Stop it, Naruto. You don’t know what you’re doing.”

“Don’t I?” his voice took on a teasing tone. Smiling again, he said, “I know exactly what I’m doing. Now stop being stupid and kiss me.” Before he knew what was happening, Sasuke’s arms were around him, he was pressed against firm muscle, and a set of lips were sealed over his. Shock wore off quickly, and he kissed back. Sasuke must have been telling the truth about having never kissed anyone. He was clumsy. But Naruto didn’t really care; he just held on tight. After a while, they pulled back a bit, getting a bit of air. “Was that so hard?” Naruto asked teasingly.

“You have no idea.” Sasuke said with a sigh. He seemed relieved, in a way. “What…” he began uncertainly, “What does this mean?”

Naruo grinned. “It means that there’s no more fucking.”

Black eyes widened, and Sasuke stammered, “What?! I—you—but I—“

“Shut up, love.” Naruto shushed him before continuing. “No more ‘fucking’. From now on, we make love. Got it?” Sasuke looked completely nonplussed, and was apparently unable to speak. He only gave a little nod. “Awesome. Now…how about we try out this ‘making love’ stuff?”

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Part III: Epilogue

From the online journal of bastard4U:

How long has it been, now? It must be a year. Who knew it would take an idiot to make me realize how stupid I’ve been? Yeah, I can admit it. I was awesomely brainless when it came to my own feelings. But ever since that day, things have only gotten better. Not that there aren’t fights. No one’s perfect. But really, he can’t stay mad at me, and there’s no way I can muster even a speck of anger when he turns on the puppy-eyes.

Who knew? I’m saying that a lot, aren’t I? Who cares? I find myself in a state of being that I thought impossible. I’m happy.

But now I run across a new problem. What should I give him for our anniversary? I’ll take suggestions if anyone reading this has them.

Over and out.

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End.

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A/N: If you're real nice and review lots, I can write a sequel where there's smut.

Love me cancerously
Like a salt-sore soaked in the sea.
'High-maintenance' means
You're a gluttonous queen
Narcissistic and mean.
Kill me romantically
Fill my soul with vomit
Then ask me for a piece of gum.
Bitter and dumb
You're my sugarplum.
You're awful, I love you!

She moves through moonbeams slowly
She knows just how to hold me
And when her edges soften
Her body is my coffin
I know she drains me slowly
She wears me down to bones in bed

Must be the sign on my head
That says, oh...
Love me dead! Love me dead!

You're a faith-healer on T.V.
You're an office park without any trees
Corporate and cold
Gushing for gold
Leave me alone.
You suck so passionately
You're a parasitic, psycho, filthy creature
finger-bangin' my heart
You call me up drunk
Does the fun ever start?
You're hideous and sexy!

She moves through moonbeams slowly
She knows just how to hold me
And when her edges soften
Her body is my coffin
I know she drains me slowly
She wears me down to bones in bed

Must be the sign on my head
That says, oh...
Love me dead! Love me dead!

Love me cancerously
Brrrot-dot-da-d-da-da!
How's your new boy?
Does he know about me?
You've got the mark of the beast.
You're born of a jackal! You're beautiful!

She moves through moonbeams slowly
She knows just how to hold me
And when her edges soften
Her body is my coffin
I know she drains me slowly
She wears me down to bones in bed

Wha' 'bout that sign on my head
That says, oh...
Love me dead!