Sasuke is that you?

Summary: Naruto has always thought Sasuke was prim and proper. After a long day at work he returns to find his best friend has snapped, in a very Un-Uchiha like way.

A/N: Yes there will be OOCness in this fanfic. Hopefully you’ll understand why soon enough. I know I should be writing more of my The Grime Reaper and Do’s and Don’ts- but the plot bunnies attacked and I needed to write this. It’s not very long, mainly because I like to hear if you guys like it before pouring my heart and soul into a piece of work.

Warnings: OOCness, Language, Overly Camp Males and Yaoiness

On with the story then!

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Naruto sighed and loosened the orange tie that was choking him. He threw his briefcase on the back seat of his car before rubbing his eyes and starting the engine, it’d take a good hour to get home. It’d been a long day. A very long day. His stupid secretary had overbooked- cramming clients in left right and centre. He’d be sure to have words with the pink-haired woman tomorrow.

Another sigh escaped his lips as he remembered some of his more disturbed clients. Haku the gender confused sex addict, Sasori who refused to go anywhere without his puppets and Ukon who couldn’t get pasted his twins death and insisted the man was still alive and living on his back. When Naruto had become a physiatrist he’d assumed all it would take was a few words of encouragement and that’d be it, poof, the persons life changed. If in doubt there was always medication, although that was a route Naruto avoided at all costs. It was a harder job than he’d thought it would be, but that only made it all the more rewarding when he successfully helped someone.

A small smile formed on his lips as he remembered some of his successes. Shikamaru’s marriage had been failing due to his extreme laziness, it had taken several weeks of therapy, but now he was considerably less lazy and was seen as merely laid back. Naruto still received gifts from Shikamaru’s happy wife. Sai had been emotionally stunted after a friends death, it took a considerably longer amount of time to get through to him, but when Naruto saw his first genuine smile it had been worth it. Hinata had been shy and reserved to the point of caving in on herself- she let it all build up within until one day she punched her father in the face. Naruto had enjoyed helping her, she was sweet and funny when she felt confident enough to talk clearly and without the usual stutter If he didn’t have a policy about dating clients he may have even asked her out.

Naruto turned into his driveway thought still on clients and the paperwork he’d have to get through that evening when he noticed something amiss. Sasuke’s car was parked on the curb. Shouldn’t his roommate still be at work? He shrugged to himself as he gathered his things- Sasuke had probably just brought his work home with him, the privileges of working in a family business. Once the car door was locked he made his way to the apartment block, hoping Sasuke had already started dinner.

He entered the dim hallway, waved a greeting to the guards on duty, and made his way to the elevators. Although the apartment block wasn’t the fanciest in the whole of Konoha it wasn’t cheap- hence why Naruto was sharing an apartment with Sasuke- sure he was steadily climbing up the career ladder but he still didn’t earn enough to live alone. Sasuke could survive alone if he wanted too, the man was loaded, yet Naruto had a feeling if he wasn’t living with him Sasuke would be forced to move to the Uchiha mansion- and the man really didn’t like his brother.

Naruto grinned widely as the elevator ascended, recalling the years the two men had spent at university together. They’d been roommates back then two-and the trouble that had caused! Naruto chuckled as he remembered the uptight Uchiha glaring at Naruto due to his “idiotic” behaviour. Flamboyant psychology student Naruto had enjoyed teasing the rigid business student know as Sasuke to the point the two men would be on the floor punching each other seven shades of purple.

How they became friends was still a mystery, although Naruto had pinned it down to his own charm and loveable nature. And stunning good looks of course.

They’d graduated as best friends and decided that three years living together hadn’t been long enough- although the people that had lived below the men had disagreed. Now they’d both fallen into a pattern, sure they still fought but it was with words now instead of fists.
Soon Naruto was jamming a key into his reasonably sized apartment’s door and throwing it open with a smile and the bellow of “Honey I’m home!”

Naruto paused in the door way, blue eyes bulging as he took stock of the sight around him.

“Sasuke?”

It couldn’t be Sasuke. A man sat sprawled out on the living room sofa, cigarette hanging lazily from his mouth. A tight black vest top hugged his lean frame- where was the business suit?!- and tight dark blue jeans wrapped around his legs.

The man that couldn’t be Sasuke looked up, black eyes sparkling with mischief. Which in itself alarmed Naruto- Sasuke’s eyes didn’t sparkle and they sure as hell didn’t sparkle with mischief damnit! Naruto almost swallowed his tongue in shock as the pale man before him pouted.

“Narrru-chan! I’m so glad your home! I’ve missed you, have you missed me?” The Not-Sasuke-Man chimed out whilst forcing himself off the sofa and began walking towards the stunned blonde. Did Sasuke just call him Naru-chan? He was used to nicknames but he was more familiar with the terms dobe, idiot and moron. And the way Sasuke was walking, swaying his hips as if he was strutting down a runway- sure Sasuke always did seem to glide as he walked, but strutting!? Strutting was so Un-Uchiha.

Sasuke removed the cigarette from his mouth, smiled widely- Naruto almost fainted- before kissing Naruto’s tanned cheeks.

“S-Sasuke?” Naruto asked, he couldn’t rein in the shock that was steadily engulfing him. What was wrong with Sasuke? Had he suffered some form of head trauma? Sasuke pouted again, lips shining- was Sasuke wearing lipgloss?!

“Stop calling me that Naru-chan! You know I prefer Sassy, or at the very least Sas-chan.” Naruto didn’t think his eyes could get any wider. That is until pale hands began caressing his cheeks, fingers trailing alone his scars.

“My pretty Naru-chan.” Sasuke purred “Lets skip dinner and head straight to bed.”

Naruto felt his arm being tugged repeatedly but remained firmly stood in the door way. He couldn’t be sure, maybe his mind was playing tricks on him, but had Sasuke just hit on him? His best friend. Mr Asexual.

“Come on! I’ve been waiting all day for you.” Sasuke demanded, the tugging on Naruto’s arm got stronger. Naruto took a moment to smell the air around him, nope- no sake fumes clung in the air. So Sasuke hadn’t been drinking. That didn’t stop another option though…

“Sasuk…erm…Sas-chan. What have you eaten today?”

Sasuke fluttered his mascara enhanced eyelashes and cocked his head inquisitively.

“Just toast and I made myself some tomato soup for lunch. Why?”

“So, you haven’t had any pills? Or smoked anything other than your cigarettes?”

Sasuke shook his head, the large smile back on his pale face. Naruto couldn’t help but find it frightening. So Sasuke hadn’t taken any anti-depressants from Naruto’s cupboard then, and he hadn’t had any drugs in general. So he hadn’t been drinking and there were no drugs in his system, then what the fuck had gotten into his stoic best friend?

Naruto decided to step with caution, he didn’t want to end up in bed with the man in front of him, regardless of how good all those tight clothes made him look. Naruto knew his best friend was 100% straight and once he’d snapped out of it everything would go back to normal and Naruto could work on suppressing this painful and traumatic encounter.

“Erm..Sassy…Have you already made dinner?”

“Yes! I couldn’t have my Naru-chan coming home without food ready now could I? I have to look after you.” Sasuke announced cheerfully, whilst waving a hand in the direction of the kitchen. “I made your favourite!”

Sasuke’s hand grabbed Naruto’s and dragged him into the kitchen. The scent of ramen assaulted Naruto’s nostrils and his stomach gave out a loud grumbled. Eating would be safe, no harm could come from eating.

“Thank-you Sas-chan. It smells divine.” Naruto said with a small smile whilst a bowl of steaming ramen was presented to him.

They both sat in silence, Sasuke inhaling the ramen in such a way that reminded Naruto of himself. Naruto took small bites of him meal, sending sideways looks at the man before him. Something was off that much was obvious. But what?

“Dobe what are you staring at?”

Naruto let out several loud coughs as noodles got wedged in the back of his throat.

“Sasuke!?”

“Who else idiot?” Sasuke raised an eyebrow clearly indicating his confusion at the blondes reaction.

“What…What was that all about?” Naruto inquired, if the raven haired bastard had been messing around the entire time he was going to get the ass kicking of a lifetime!

“What?” Sasuke frowned whilst Naruto simply stared. Could he not remember? This was bad. Very, very bad. Naruto switched to psychiatrist mode.

“Sasuke, what did you do today?”

“Got up. Went work. Came home. Had dinner. And now I’m having the worlds most insane conversation, that cover it for you dobe?” Sasuke was becoming irritated. He’d been a work all day and now he had to listen to Naruto bizarre conversations- sometimes he wished he’d decided to stay home.

Naruto nodded absently, making his analysis. He took into account the mans dress, he had defiantly not been to work like that- although he’d have to ring and check with Itachi. Time to step the questioning up a gear.

“What did you do at work Sasuke? Who made dinner? What time did you wake up?”

Sasuke looked puzzled, the frown deepened as he rummaged through his memory of the day. He shook his head before glaring at the blonde.

“I don’t see what it has to do with you moron.”

Ah. So Sasuke didn’t remember. Sasuke was never one to refuse to talk about work- or bitch about his bossy elder brother. Well then, now it all made sense. The normally emotionally stunted, stoic man had developed another personality. A flamboyant, sexually deviant personality that seemed to think Naruto was his lover.

Shit.
Multiple personality disorder.
Sasuke was never going to believe him.

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I don’t take psychology although I know a tad about multiple personality disorder. Normally people suffering from this disorder don’t remember anything when the other personality takes over but I wanted Sasuke to have fabricated something to make himself believe everything was fine.

Poor Sasuke! I do love to torture him. I’m sorry if I’ve made him seem overly camp! That wasn’t may intention- I wanted a more extrovert Sasuke instead- the thought of making this ‘Sassy’ gay came later on and now I’m not sure if it was the right thing to do…

Should I continue?
Let me know what you think, critique always welcomed.