Betting Celibacy
folder
Naruto › Het - Male/Female › Kakashi/Sakura
Rating:
Adult +
Chapters:
1
Views:
3,520
Reviews:
1
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Category:
Naruto › Het - Male/Female › Kakashi/Sakura
Rating:
Adult +
Chapters:
1
Views:
3,520
Reviews:
1
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Disclaimer:
Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto, If I did, Kakshi would be half naked in most shots and be without that bloody mask. Another hint at me not owning Naruto is that I'm poor, because I do not make any money from these writings.
Betting Celibacy
Hey all!
Just so you know, I'm writing this between babysitting my cousins, which I swear are half human, half devil...
So yeah, I keep on going off to make sure they don't set fire to the curtains again or stop them from putting the hamster in the fridge. And then when I come back, I forget what I was gonna write and have to think of something else...
Gah! just tell me how to improve this, okay?
Bon Appetit!
-----------
How the fuck did I end up here?
In a bar? That on it’s own doesn’t sound entirely impossible. Any self respecting Jounin needs a good drink every now and then. But in a bar with Maito Gai? Oh, hell no.
Is it really that much to ask for? A nice, quiet drink after a long day of pointless files. Why oh why did I decide to come to “Happy Chappy’s” bar? So what if it’s closest? I know from experience that this was a hotbed of ‘the beauty of youth’ as my self-proclaimed arch rival called it. And so I have a bladdered Gai and his thankfully sober young subordinate trying to keep his beloved sensei upright whilst coming on to some poor defenceless women. I run a gloved hand through my unruly silver hair and call the bartender over.
“Another one, Kakashi-san? Don’t you think you’ve had enough? I hear you’ve got a mission tomorrow.” I raise an eyebrow at the old man and meaningfully look over to the two rejected men to my right, waterfalls coming from their bloodshot eyes. “Ah, I see…” the short and slightly chubby man reached up to produce a large bottle of whiskey before saying. “It’s on me. You’ll need it with those two…” I give him signature eye crease as a thank you and take a lightning speed swig just in time for Tweedledumb and Tweedledumber to flop down either side of me, defeated.
“I told you.” I deadpan
“You don’t see, Kakashi-sensei. Even if I wanted to, I cannot use my youthful charm on those women because my heart belongs to another.” Lee says with his usual unnecessary passion.
“Yes! And I cannot do so either if my beloved student is troubled even in the slightest.” Gai continues with equal cheesiness. I take another quick gulp of my whiskey whilst they share one of their moments.
“As touching and slightly disturbing as this is” I interrupt coolly “Just who is Lee referring to? Surely not my beloved student Sakura? Because you know I would personally see to it that you CAN’T 'make love'-" I grimace underneath my mask "-to her once I’m done with you” Lee and Gai both gulp and back away slightly from me. What can I say? Old habits die hard. And Sakura still very much needs protecting. She’s grown up into one helluva woman. She’s filled out her curves and now has way too many followers for my liking. Over time, between Naruto, Tsunade and myself, no guy has managed get to her just yet. None of them are good enough. Although Sakura could easily break every bone in their body, she’s far too naïve and trusting of the men around here. I'm purely being her protective sensei. My thoughts are interrupted by an all too familiar rambunctious laugh and turn my head slightly... just in time to see Genma stick his tongue down some blonde's throat. Lovely.
"Ugh." I turn my head from the freak show of public porn to an equally disturbing Gai and Lee raising their caterpillar eyebrows at me. Oh great, now what?
"You can hardly look down your nose at that." Gai nods his head over my shoulder and takes a deep breath. Ugh, another lecture. He sticks a finger in my face waaaaay too close the tip of my mask and my fists clench automatically. "You, Hatake Kakashi are as big of a disgrace as Genma.." I raise an eyebrow and deliberately turn my head to Genma sticking his hand up the blonde's skimpy top before turn back to Gai. My visible eye daring him to continue. But I forgot that this man doesn't even know how to stop. "Okay, so maybe not as much, but definitely close! You openly read pornographic books in public and are a known womaniser." Lee nods like a puppy on his side. I sigh and turn fully to face the two idiots.
"Firstly, I would appreciate that you do not associate me with Mr Perve over there, who is permanently in my bad books for making his dirty move on Sakura." I look over to a now pale skinned Lee, who is looking daggers at Genma "Secondly, speaking of books, Icha Icha is a series of cleverly written romance novels. They are written with warnings because the humour and situations occurring in them are things only adults will understand. And finally, my love life is nothing to do with you. Just because yours is non-existent there's no need to poke around in mine." I turn back around to take a blink-and-you'll-miss-it victory swig of my whiskey. Suck on that weirdos.
"You really are a ba-" Gai begins but is interrupted by a surprisingly calm Lee.
"Okay. The I propose a bet" I raise my head a fraction. I always have had a competitive streak. "You spend one whole month-31 days- without the romantic company of a woman and we'll keep out of your love-life..." Gai starts to argue but Lee continues "buuuuuut, if you do give in to your desire, you must give up your beloved Icha Icha series for one month... and I get a date with Sakura" He and Gai share equally smug faces whilst I sit in silent horror. Don't get me wrong, it's not as if I couldn't, I am a Konoha shinobi and self-control is a very important part of that, it's just the idea of giving up my student and books. But then I remember how she so adamantly avoided him and the fact that my books were hidden guarded with a trap involving some paintballs which are a bugger to get off of skin. Confident in those facts, I shared a smug smile with them.
"When I win, not only will you stay out of my love life, but you both must wear tutus for one month. Even on missions." I suppress the chuckle in my throat at the image of them in tutus. Oh this was gonna be good. I could practically see the cogs in their minds going over this for a few minutes before they looked to each other and nodded
"Done!" They say in unison whilst flashing their creepy smiles and good-guy thumbs up signs before Gai downs his drink and staggers out of the bar smugly, Lee in tow.
Oh yeah, this was gonna be good.
Just so you know, I'm writing this between babysitting my cousins, which I swear are half human, half devil...
So yeah, I keep on going off to make sure they don't set fire to the curtains again or stop them from putting the hamster in the fridge. And then when I come back, I forget what I was gonna write and have to think of something else...
Gah! just tell me how to improve this, okay?
Bon Appetit!
-----------
How the fuck did I end up here?
In a bar? That on it’s own doesn’t sound entirely impossible. Any self respecting Jounin needs a good drink every now and then. But in a bar with Maito Gai? Oh, hell no.
Is it really that much to ask for? A nice, quiet drink after a long day of pointless files. Why oh why did I decide to come to “Happy Chappy’s” bar? So what if it’s closest? I know from experience that this was a hotbed of ‘the beauty of youth’ as my self-proclaimed arch rival called it. And so I have a bladdered Gai and his thankfully sober young subordinate trying to keep his beloved sensei upright whilst coming on to some poor defenceless women. I run a gloved hand through my unruly silver hair and call the bartender over.
“Another one, Kakashi-san? Don’t you think you’ve had enough? I hear you’ve got a mission tomorrow.” I raise an eyebrow at the old man and meaningfully look over to the two rejected men to my right, waterfalls coming from their bloodshot eyes. “Ah, I see…” the short and slightly chubby man reached up to produce a large bottle of whiskey before saying. “It’s on me. You’ll need it with those two…” I give him signature eye crease as a thank you and take a lightning speed swig just in time for Tweedledumb and Tweedledumber to flop down either side of me, defeated.
“I told you.” I deadpan
“You don’t see, Kakashi-sensei. Even if I wanted to, I cannot use my youthful charm on those women because my heart belongs to another.” Lee says with his usual unnecessary passion.
“Yes! And I cannot do so either if my beloved student is troubled even in the slightest.” Gai continues with equal cheesiness. I take another quick gulp of my whiskey whilst they share one of their moments.
“As touching and slightly disturbing as this is” I interrupt coolly “Just who is Lee referring to? Surely not my beloved student Sakura? Because you know I would personally see to it that you CAN’T 'make love'-" I grimace underneath my mask "-to her once I’m done with you” Lee and Gai both gulp and back away slightly from me. What can I say? Old habits die hard. And Sakura still very much needs protecting. She’s grown up into one helluva woman. She’s filled out her curves and now has way too many followers for my liking. Over time, between Naruto, Tsunade and myself, no guy has managed get to her just yet. None of them are good enough. Although Sakura could easily break every bone in their body, she’s far too naïve and trusting of the men around here. I'm purely being her protective sensei. My thoughts are interrupted by an all too familiar rambunctious laugh and turn my head slightly... just in time to see Genma stick his tongue down some blonde's throat. Lovely.
"Ugh." I turn my head from the freak show of public porn to an equally disturbing Gai and Lee raising their caterpillar eyebrows at me. Oh great, now what?
"You can hardly look down your nose at that." Gai nods his head over my shoulder and takes a deep breath. Ugh, another lecture. He sticks a finger in my face waaaaay too close the tip of my mask and my fists clench automatically. "You, Hatake Kakashi are as big of a disgrace as Genma.." I raise an eyebrow and deliberately turn my head to Genma sticking his hand up the blonde's skimpy top before turn back to Gai. My visible eye daring him to continue. But I forgot that this man doesn't even know how to stop. "Okay, so maybe not as much, but definitely close! You openly read pornographic books in public and are a known womaniser." Lee nods like a puppy on his side. I sigh and turn fully to face the two idiots.
"Firstly, I would appreciate that you do not associate me with Mr Perve over there, who is permanently in my bad books for making his dirty move on Sakura." I look over to a now pale skinned Lee, who is looking daggers at Genma "Secondly, speaking of books, Icha Icha is a series of cleverly written romance novels. They are written with warnings because the humour and situations occurring in them are things only adults will understand. And finally, my love life is nothing to do with you. Just because yours is non-existent there's no need to poke around in mine." I turn back around to take a blink-and-you'll-miss-it victory swig of my whiskey. Suck on that weirdos.
"You really are a ba-" Gai begins but is interrupted by a surprisingly calm Lee.
"Okay. The I propose a bet" I raise my head a fraction. I always have had a competitive streak. "You spend one whole month-31 days- without the romantic company of a woman and we'll keep out of your love-life..." Gai starts to argue but Lee continues "buuuuuut, if you do give in to your desire, you must give up your beloved Icha Icha series for one month... and I get a date with Sakura" He and Gai share equally smug faces whilst I sit in silent horror. Don't get me wrong, it's not as if I couldn't, I am a Konoha shinobi and self-control is a very important part of that, it's just the idea of giving up my student and books. But then I remember how she so adamantly avoided him and the fact that my books were hidden guarded with a trap involving some paintballs which are a bugger to get off of skin. Confident in those facts, I shared a smug smile with them.
"When I win, not only will you stay out of my love life, but you both must wear tutus for one month. Even on missions." I suppress the chuckle in my throat at the image of them in tutus. Oh this was gonna be good. I could practically see the cogs in their minds going over this for a few minutes before they looked to each other and nodded
"Done!" They say in unison whilst flashing their creepy smiles and good-guy thumbs up signs before Gai downs his drink and staggers out of the bar smugly, Lee in tow.
Oh yeah, this was gonna be good.