A grain of truth
folder
Naruto › Yaoi - Male/Male
Rating:
Adult
Chapters:
15
Views:
1,044
Reviews:
30
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Category:
Naruto › Yaoi - Male/Male
Rating:
Adult
Chapters:
15
Views:
1,044
Reviews:
30
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Disclaimer:
I do not own Naruto, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.
X
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“Reverting back to your teens?” Neji said coolly, pallid lilac eyes peering from above the newspaper he was reading to narrow his gaze on the lithe blonde who had stopped midway of walking to the dining table, a bowl of rice in his hands and his front covered with an apron, that didn’t make the large neckline long sleeve shirt exposing his neck to the half of his chest unnoticed, or the tight jeans he was wearing, hugging his shape wholly.
“Neji, WHAT is wrong with me this time?” The blonde with a hint of losing patience in his voice, placing the bowl of rice together with the dishes he had already placed on the table while three drooling kids fought the urge to chow down the meal in one gulp, well, at least the two youngest of the three was trying to hide it, Maria wasn’t doing all that well in pretending apparently.
“Can’t you change into more formal attire? You do know the family is going to visit.”
“You never bothered about what I wore when you met me. I thought you rather liked seeing me like this. Anyway, I’m going to take a bath later, I’ll think what I can wear later.” Neji only narrowed his eyes more because of that statement and turned to folding the newspaper and placing it on the side of the table, sipping his coffee, two ravens of seven years and a blonde in the same height as them constantly swaying their feet under the table back and forth, not bothering to understand what their parents were talking about. Just that their granpa’s visiting with their aunts and uncles and there’re going to have many gifts after.
“Mama is uncle Sasuke going to come too?” Maria looked up to Naruto who was scooping him his serving of omelet, hotdogs and fried rice just like the others and received a bright smile from the blonde.
“Of course, he never misses right? After this you go and clean up your rooms, so your gramps will give you rewards after ‘k?”
“Aww cleaning again? But I wanna play with Nozomi and Hakuto later. And ‘m gonna be tired if I clean up now…”
“You wouldn’t have to clean if you weren’t being messy in the first place.” The raven with the reminiscent eye lines beside Maria answered with cool indifference to his whining, which the youngest raven beside him nodded to.
“Psh, shut it neat freak. I’m a kid, I should be messy, right mom?”
“Well I don’t know if your father’d agree with that. Since he is a self proclaimed neat freak too.”
“Hn.”
“How about I help you clean up Mari, and then you can play with your little brothers later.”
“Are they still sleeping?” Hikari asked, looking at the dining room’s exit, looking at the western living room to the stairs leading to the second floor.
“Hm? Ah-” A squeaky whine erupted from the room upstairs, cutting off most of what Naruto would like to say and the family looked up to the direction of the stairs. The blonde couldn’t help but sigh at the noise, removing his apron to walk to the stainless bottle sterilizer that had cooled off minutes ago and put appropriate servings of milk powder in a pair of eight ounce bottles. “Well, I guess that answers your question Hikari. You guys go on and eat, Nagi, you lead the prayer. I’ll be back.”
And the blonde scurried out the dining room, climbing the stairs with hurried steps and opening the room closest to the corner just beside the master’s bed room and was welcomed with a pair of crying babies, pallid eyes unclear with their tears and the snivel already running down their parted mouths.
Naruto walked to the crib which used to hold the triplets when they were still in their younger state and hushed the twins with gentle fingers pruned from washing the clothes earlier. They both inherited their father’s eyes and hair, proving of the Hyuga’s strength in the genes, it had been two years since they had married.
And because he was legally registered as a male, Neji had to do a lot of office work to fabricate those documents with a considerable amount of money but in Naruto’s opinion it was a lot of bucks to bribe the registrar of the family registry in their place. Without much fuss about the populace they had married with very little people involved, just the inner circle of the family in the judge’s office which was Higashi’s close friend and since Naruto was already ripe of age in his twentieth year his parents’ presence weren’t needed, though inside of him he still hoped that his father would forgive him.
Two years after their marriage, after their four years of being together, the twins were born. Unbelievably during those six years that they’ve been together, even though Sasuke and Sayuri were married first their marriage remained without children, even though Kiba and Hinata already had Yuuhi months after their marriage.
The house that Naruto had inherited from his real father in Kobe was renovated to a western house mansion, because the location was near to the metro and only a bus away from the town’s amenities they didn’t have any problem moving. He was reluctant at first, to leave the apartment which held so much memories especially the baby room which his friends and Neji had helped arrange. But his husband had promised that it will stay as it was and never be allowed to be inhibited by anyone except them if they wanted to return to Tokyo.
He dropped from University and had just recently went back, achieving a class A certificate to teach in an elementary school downtown which his children was also attending they pretty much embraced family life whole heartedly. Except that from time to time the issue about Sasuke would be brought up by Neji, which Naruto had a difficult time handling but Neji wasn’t the only one having problems. It was because recently Neji’s secretary would frequently pop before their doorstep to stay over to help Neji with some cases since the man did the most of his work online.
Naruto wasn’t the type to get jealous or be bothered with trivial matters, however, when you’re always getting the chance to accidentally see a refined shapely woman, with well manicured nails, voluptuous painted lips, curly brown hair and big boobs flaunting her cleavage covered only in a strip of tube over a revealing coat laughing with your husband, hitting his shoulder playfully and sometimes tripping over her high heels to get caught in your dense husband’s arms which looked a little too done on purpose… wouldn’t you want to bash her head too? And the bastard looked like he was enjoying getting a rise from Naruto, the jerk.
He too was never one to be bothered by what his appearance would be to other people, but now he would always find himself looking disgruntled in front of the mirror. Was he getting fat or was it just neurosis from conversing with Chouji next door too much?
Naruto gently put down the twins to walk on the rubber covered floor, the baby room had the same designs as the one they had in the apartment and the rectangular plywood hanging on the wall spanning it almost entirely opposite the crib was now crowded with picture frames of various designs with pictures of the children and the Hyuga family including the few ones with Sasuke.
“Hello little babies!!!” Not long after Naruto had put the children down Maria burst into the door running towards the chubby twins with a rice still stuck on his cheek, followed by a quiet Nagi and a sighing Hikari. The blonde boy embraced the twins in a bear hug, the twins in turn giggling at the contact.
“Mari, what are you doing here? Have you finished breakfast already?” Their mother asked while picking the toys left littered on the floor from their playing last night.
“Uhn, we’ve already finished. And father’s got a visitor anyway, so we already left.”
“A visitor?” Naruto squeezed the orange fox plushie in his hand, something about the word visitor didn’t sound right to his ears, and the grip on the toy hardened even more when he heard the familiar shrill laugh of the said visitor.
Speaking of the damn devil.
“It’s that woman again. I thought today’s dad’s day off.” Hikari went to help his mother tidy up the crib, removing toys in there and Nagi followed while Maria rolled on the floor with the twin one year olds.
“He never stops working.” Nagi muttered, it was the first sentence he had spoken in the morning.
“Ah, I just remembered, we had to think of what I’ll cook for lunch later, Maria how about we go shopping for grocery, how’d you like that?” A forced smile was ignored by Maria’s ‘hurrah’, but Hikari, being the most observant of the two noticed the difference, he knew there was something he didn’t like about that flashy woman.
“Nagi, can you go down and check the stock in the cupboard, list some things we need to buy.”
“I’m going to stay here and watch the house for you mom, gramps and the others may arrive earlier, and dad wouldn’t be able to entertain them with HER around.”
“Thanks Hikari.” Hikari let Naruto ruffle his jet black hair, every time he would look at him, the way he carried himself, his self discipline and the observant gaze, everything about Hikari seemed to shout the name Uchiha all over while Nagi was quiet and shy, although he held the confidence of an adult and could interact well with the others if he wanted, during nursery Naruto asked Nagi why he was so quiet, he answered because he felt it unnecessary to talk about useless things, too troublesome. Now that had reminded him of someone.
He took half an hour longer in the bath than usual, mostly spent fussing over his hair trimmed to the style he had way before he met Neji, in front of the mirror he noticed first the firm and long thighs he had acquired through repeated climbing of the stairs in the school an the subway, his four packs he regained after a year of conceiving and shoulders broader, and that straight scar running from below his navel down to the area before the hairy part.
Wherever he looked, he was a guy, his knuckles were larger, his jaw was more angular although the shape of his eyes gave the impression of a fox smiling, his voice had deepened when he hit the final stages of puberty at nineteen. Come to think of it, what did Neji like about him? When they first met, he looked every part a woman because of the sudden imbalance in his hormones, making him look more like a woman. Did he like big chests? Naomi’s skin was flawless and pearly white… I bet she didn’t have those stretch marks like the ones on his hips and at the back of his knees.
He had never once thought of that scar to be something that would bother him, to be truthful he was proud of that scar, that was where his children came from after all but now remembering Naomi’s flawless skin he just felt a little too embarrassed to let others see it especially to Neji.
“Where are you going?” Naruto paused from closing the door leading to the front gate to look over his shoulder with a smile, Maria in his hand and the two others seeing him off.
“Oh, sorry I wasn’t meaning to not leave without saying anything. Just some grocery shopping, be back before lunch. Nagi will take care of the babies.”
“In THAT clothing again?” Neji was always used to seeing people either dressed in suits or formal dresses, not some tank top covered with a jacket and jeans. And that was what he was exactly seeing while he was narrowing his eyes from the top of the stairs after he came out of the study, he didn’t want to be particular why he silently hated seeing those clothes, it just gives more proof to the myth about blondes being considered as sex symbols wherever they go, and Naruto just gives that kind of aura every damn time he wasn’t in loose long sleeve shirts and in an apron.
“What, I changed didn’t I? Besides, it’s just grocery shopping. I don’t need a suit for that, do I?” The blonde said in a joking manner, but the older man’s crease on his forehead just deepened than it was already earlier.
“Bring the car with you.”
“Nah, I’m taking a taxi, you know I’m still not confident about my driving skills, you don’t want me crashing your precious car do you? Do you want me to buy you something? Mild Seven?”
“No, just… that outfit-” And the long-haired man’s brow twitched.
“Oh come on Neji, I’m going, no one in their right mind would harass someone in a grocery store, much less a guy, and with kids. Mari’s there, he’ll kick their butts if there was any.”
“Yeah daddy! I’m gonna kick some assesses! Don’t worry I’ll protect mommy!”
“And I’m going to protect dad. Leave him to me.” Naruto fought the urge to chuckle at Hikari’s wink, it seemed he wasn’t the only one feeling uneasy about that woman.
“What protecting are you talking about Hika-”
“Dad can I hang out in your study for a while? I want to see some info about Ted Bundy.”
“Ah, alright. You can come when you want.” Out of the three Neji found relation to Hikari more, not that he was having favoritism, just that Hikari’s liking to Neji’s work drew the two closer unlike what Naruto had thought, since Hikari was the spitting image of his real dad even with the eye lines.
While Maria wanted to be an Interpol detective with his keen sense of smell to clues and endless patience (he always finds Neji’s car keys whenever it’s missing), Hikari’s dream was to be a lawyer like his dad (he cornered the guilty candy stealer in their school when he was in nursery), and Nagi who was the quietest of the three had the most ambitious dream of all. CIA he said, secretive and a young genius following after his two older brothers, with his ability to adapt to any kind of situation, sharp common sense and the personality of being abnormally calm even in disasters (like when his favorite ant collection escaped or when he was trapped in the elevator), he’d have no problem passing.
“Neji, what’s your son doing in here?” Naomi asked in a near annoyed tone, the boy raising an eyebrow towards her while he was facing his own laptop on a mini table in the corner of Neji’s study room, his little office, Neji had branded fondly.
“Just let him. He’s not going to bother us, Hikari just wants to hang out here to kill time.” The long haired man already in his mid thirties took his seat on the swivel chair, ignoring Naomi’s quiet huffing as she took the seat in front of Neji’s table and started to look on the files for their current case.
“Doesn’t he want to play with his brothers?”
“Nagi’s playing with the kids in the other room. My wife left for the grocery so he had nothing to do.”
“Oh? Then, it’s only the two of us-” Naomi’s hazel brown eyes darted towards the unaware man’s chest, she’d had a crush on him since her first day at work, she couldn’t believe he’d get swallowed by a flat chest girl with a crotch to boot.
“Dad your button’s loose, you’ll catch cold.” Neji blinked at his son’s sudden joining in the conversation, realizing that his button really was loose and showed off the beginning of his chest, so with methodical hands he buttoned them up before sizing up the plaintiff’s profile.
And Naomi’s gaze shot through the boy’s own, eyes clashing and narrowing, Hikari just smirked before going back to his ‘research’.
“So that thing I found lying in mom and dad’s room is called a con… conn…dom…?” The raven muttered straining his eyes to pronounce the word better, he had always liked learning new words, before his head snapped to his father’s direction only to see that his father’s coffee had gone through the wrong passage.
“Neji you alright?”
“Hn, so what’s that tube of K-Y used for?” Hikari went back to his researching and found the look of his father’s blushing face interesting, it was needless to say Neji became awkwardly self conscious after that. He should tell this interesting new discovery to Maria and Nagi later.
+++
“Is that all Mari?” Naruto looked over to his son beside him who was reading the list of things they needed to buy, a cart full of food and household things.
“Nope, we’re still missing one.”
“Eh? I thought we had it all checked out.”
“You still hadn’t bought a police car and magnifying glass.”
“What’re we going to use a magnifying glass fo-” The blonde’s mouth stopped midway, his mouth shaped in an ‘o’ closing into a grin.
“Tsk, tsk, you’re a hundred years too early to fool me Maria Uzumaki Hyuga. We’re going.”
“But mommmmmy… it’s just ten dollars, over there, and there’s also some toys for bargain sale… two aisles from here. Look, look!” Naruto raised a brow, his son’s memory really works when it comes to the things he like, but the blonde folded his arms, a stern look on his face, and his smaller version already knew, that there was no touching that budget until Christmas.
“Let’s go to the counter.” Once again he ignored his son’s trembling lips, eyes already in the verge of crying when a familiar silk laced voice, cold and deep called out to them from behind.
“Naruto?”
His hair had grown a little, but the last time they saw each other, Sasuke was taller, now they were nearly standing eyes to eyes, just an inch or two probably because his growth spurt shot up when he hit twenty, making his limbs longer than they already were. The raven was dressed for the first time in Naruto’s opinion in a casual outfit, pink button down shirt with the sleeves folded up to the elbow and loose jeans. If the guy introduced himself as a college student, he’d passed as one.
“Uncle!!!!” Maria came squealing as he ran towards his favorite uncle, well, Kiba’s his favorite uncle too, but he felt much closer towards the raven for some reason. Sasuke chuckled at the incoming little squirt, he squatted, arms outstretched ready to accept the attack and he braced his butt to hit the floor when Maria jumped towards him.
“Hello, how’s the little inspector doing? Did you get some bad guys behind jaily?”
“Yeah! Yeah! You know there’s this bully at school! He likes to do wedgy and put spiders in Sachi’s shoes, so what I did…”
Years back, Naruto couldn’t have imagined Sasuke laughing freely in front of others, or baby talking in the least. Somehow, the children’s coming into his lives had changed him for the better, but there was one thing Naruto wanted so bad to disappear in his personality, because although his assholeness faded it didn’t disappear altogether.
“Oi dobe, what’re you daydreaming over there about. Hurry up. We’re eating out.”
Immediately Naruto snapped out of his musings, fake glaring towards the bastard in front of him with that trademark smirk Hikari seemed to have inherited and just followed the two towards the counter.
“Hey what are you doing here anyway? I thought you’d come with the rest?”
“I did, they went straight to your house, I just stopped by at the store opposite here to get some things. I saw you from the window so I came here.” The beeping of that machine in the cashier area repeatedly echoed in the background of their conversation.
“Eh? Why so early? I haven’t even cooked for them.”
“I live just an hour from here, they’re further so I think they’re still on the road, and they still had to pick up dog breath and his wife.”
“Where’s Sayuri by the way?”
“She couldn’t come this time, she’s busy with work. That’s the only thing she can occupy herself with for the mean time.”
“What, she’s still taking pills?” At that Naruto was distracted by the cashier’s voice, and he opened his wallet to give a lump estimation of the cost of the groceries while Maria took the privilege of taking the loose change. And he was surprised at the answer Sasuke had given him.
Giving Naruto a smile that looked like he was trying to laugh while having a constipation Sasuke said, “That’s the problem, she’d stopped taking them a long time ago.”
What was next was silence, and Naruto hopped into the seat beside the driver’s while Sasuke put the groceries together with his own in the trunk of his car, Maria had dozed off halfway in Sasuke’s arms inside the store and continued to nap even when he was put to lie on the back of the seat.
“It’s half past ten, we should get going I should be cooking lunch right now.”
“Yeah.” Maneuvering the stirring wheel as the engine began to heat up, the eye catching audi quattro left the parking space of the department store. But the timing of the traffic was right for them to continue their conversation earlier.
“She’s infertile. We tried couple of times already, even consulted a physician for methods but as you can see there was no result.”
“Why?”
“The doctor said it was stress, the emotional kind, even without that I just found out her relatives from his father’s side had a history of infertility and with her constant work, alcohol and cigarettes…”
“What did she say about it? Stress… I don’t see any reason why she should have that kind of problem, I mean every time I see her she’s always laughing.”
“You know Naruto, you’re very alike in many ways… She knew about us and the kids but she pretended she didn’t know, always laughing, and because she was aware that our marriage was for convenience, not healing herself appeared to be some sort of rebellion on her side. I was at fault too, since I let her think that I could like her. Normally if the whole clan was still alive, they would immediately suggest for separation but… somehow I pity her.”
“That’s new.” The cars advanced a little further, but they had been in that same spot for thirty minutes already. “Are you sure it’s not something else? Maybe you’d liked her on the way without you realizing yet and just taking it as some kind of pity for her.”
“You think I don’t know myself Naruto? Up till now…” Naruto stripped his gaze away from Sasuke’s eyes, facing the front instead and quickly putting his hand back on his lap when he felt the cool deft hand of the Uchiha crawling up to his.
“The traffic’s loose already. Let’s go.”
+++
“Where have you been?” Neji’s stern appearance was the first to welcome his line of vision the moment he stepped outside the car.
“Sorry I was late, there was a traffic jam along the overpass so-” Neji’s eyes shot directly to the man emerging from the driver’s seat, but Sasuke remained indifferent to the Hyuga, in time he had learned to let the hostility in those pair of pallid lilac eyes he would always get whenever they would see each other slide and went to carry the sleeping Maria from the car who had woken up from his father’s hissing growl.
“Whatever, they’ve been waiting for you for two hours already. If Naomi wasn’t here you’d have starved the whole family.”
“Where’re the kids?”
“Washing the dishes, something you’re supposed to do. Get inside.”
“Ma? Is dad angry or something? He looks piss.” Maria said drowsily, rubbing his eyes and not noticing the snort that had escaped Sasuke’s mouth at the misuse of the word.
“Go on inside and greet them. We’ll just get the things from the car okay?”
“Okay!” Pretty soon a chorus of ‘brat’, ‘so cute’ and questions about Naruto echoed from inside the house and Kiba burst outside the door like a dog depraved of food for so long, nearly jumping Naruto as he screamed his name at the top of his lungs.
Naruto’s muffled whimper at being squished against the man’s chest was ignored as he was held by the shoulders and stripped from the company of Kiba’s chest and in front of a pair of scrutinizing brown eyes.“Naruto dude I so fucking missed you man!!! Wait, there’s something wrong here.”
“Kiba?” Without any hint of warning the brunette zipped the jacket down to expose his black tank top and let out an inhuman shriek as Kiba raised the blonde’s shirt. “Kiba what the fuck are you doing asshole!?”
“Yup, still there.”
And Nozomi’s rattle came in direct contact with the back of Kiba’s head. “Ow, shit Shino that’s the third one in a day!!!” Which happened to be what Shino was holding earlier when he followed Kiba out the living room, tsk, tsk, tsk, those two never changed, and apparently Shikamaru too, he was still the lazy fine arts bastard that he was when Naruto first met him, it didn’t change even when he changed his course to political science.
Kiba’s whining as he repeatedly rubbed the bruised part was ignored as Shino and Shikamaru went outside to welcome Naruto, receiving welcome embraces from the two. “Unfortunately Kiba, unlike in Naruto’s case fatherhood didn’t do any good to your idiocy.”
“It only got worse, apparently.” Shikamaru yawned, he barely had the time to sleep since he had finished his theses in political science.
“What, I was just making sure he didn’t grow boobs in the one year that we’ve been apart.” The pony-tailed man and Shino nodded at this, Naruto’s features had grown manlier than the last time they had seen him, hot was the word, and looking at his hair cut which reminded him of his teenage years and the clothes they couldn’t help but agree.
“Clothes really do make the man, eh Shika?”
“Quit going on about my clothes! They’re casual, CASUAL. What’s wrong about it? Even though they’re old, they still fit, so I don’t find any reason why I shouldn’t wear it. Besides… I’ve had enough of wearing maternity dresses.”
“Hn, it really does.” Sasuke mused loudly with a smirk, before going inside with the groceries Naruto was supposed to be carrying.
“Eh?”
“He means we should go inside already dumbass.” Kiba then picked up the paper bags from the trunk which was what Sasuke had bought, and the two followed.
What followed after was a series of bear hugs, kids squealing in the living room and a lot of exchanges of conversations about what had happened last year, the winter was fast approaching, you can smell it in the mid-autumn air with the fast shedding of the leaves, the sky being colored with russet browns and deep oranges during sunsets and your feet sinking with ginko leaves in your front and backyard.
The nights would be colder than when it was summer, navy blue sky bright with the waning moon studded with beads of stars flooding the night sky. But Naruto didn’t have the time to notice those things for now, because he was concentrating not to walk out the living room because of Neji.
Ever since they had arrived, Neji kept bitching about his tardiness earlier, he was silent through the reunion and when he did talk it either had a hidden barb against his inability to be a housewife or just plainly making the blonde’s ears almost bleed with his grunting. Naruto was aware that the family had noticed this but was just trying to ignore, the bastard was embarrassing him already as it is, and what’s worst, in front of the infuriating secretary who still couldn’t get a life after staying longer than she was expected.
“Well then, I’ll be going Neji, Mr. Hyuga and the family, I apologize for bothering you.” Naomi cheerfully bowed, secretly giggling inside as the sparks flew between the distance of the brunette and Neji’s blonde wife because of the glare she was receiving.
“I’ll take you to the terminal. It’s already dark for you to walk alone this time of night.” Some part of Naomi jumped and inwardly cheered for herself at the offer but that thought quickly left her as she heard the c.d. case Naruto was holding snap with its crisp cracking sound.
“Ahh… no, my car’s just in the corner since the garage was already full. Don’t worry, I can take care of myself.”
“At least allow me to drive you to the terminal. I’ve already bothered you with going here from Tokyo.”
“Well, I guess if you insist.”
“Take care Ms. Naomi, that lunch you made was very tasty. You’d make a good housewife.” Hiashi had said that only as a parting greeting, it had always been in his personality to leave a good impression with others since Naruto once told him that he looked rather strict, he didn’t expect though, for his niece to find another excuse to make his wife feel worse.
“I bet.” Naruto fought the urge bury the edge of the c.d. case he was holding in Neji’s eyes as those lilac colored orbs darted towards him, that’s it, he’d had enough, screw not being able to have sex with him for the few months of his recovery, that bastard was going to sleep alone in his bed tonight!
He was thankful Kiba and the rest were in the baby room upstairs playing with the children and Hiashi was the only one to notice the tears already welling up in his eyes, so with a barely hidden shaking of his voice. “I’ll go wash the dishes.”
But instead of staying in the kitchen, his feet brought him inside the bathroom and locked himself inside, sitting himself on the rim of the bathtub he pondered on why Neji kept bitching about things like some sulking teenager who didn’t get to attend a party he liked and was rebelling with as much perseverance as he can, during those moments, tears he had been holding up for the half of the day began to stream freely down his cheeks, and even though his chest hurt and his throat felt like it was burning, he felt as if a weight had just been lifted off his shoulders.
So he thinks I’m not an effective wife? Fucking retard, he couldn’t even get a damn egg fried if I wasn’t there to keep it from burning the entire house!
Well he could just shove it to his ass, that bitch is to blame for all this! Imposing herself on my family like some know-it-all perfect woman and that bastard for letting her flirt with him! If Hikari wasn’t around who knows what they could’ve done inside that damn study room! I’m not even allowed to step inside it if it wasn’t for something important!
He hoped after this he would be able to put up a convincing façade to the family.
Apparently, it didn’t work for the Uchiha. Naruto couldn’t remember how long he’d stayed inside, but when he finally decided to leave, what welcomed him was the unexpected appearance of the raven haired man in front of him the moment he opened the bathroom.
He was sure his eyes didn’t look that sore in the mirror.
*OH my *Beep*ing GOD! I actually exceeded the ten chapter limit!? *Beep* me I’m dreaming!!!! Have you noticed I’ve been using the ‘f’ word quite a lot? It’s become one of my favorite words… hurrah for the *Beep*ing censorship!
“Reverting back to your teens?” Neji said coolly, pallid lilac eyes peering from above the newspaper he was reading to narrow his gaze on the lithe blonde who had stopped midway of walking to the dining table, a bowl of rice in his hands and his front covered with an apron, that didn’t make the large neckline long sleeve shirt exposing his neck to the half of his chest unnoticed, or the tight jeans he was wearing, hugging his shape wholly.
“Neji, WHAT is wrong with me this time?” The blonde with a hint of losing patience in his voice, placing the bowl of rice together with the dishes he had already placed on the table while three drooling kids fought the urge to chow down the meal in one gulp, well, at least the two youngest of the three was trying to hide it, Maria wasn’t doing all that well in pretending apparently.
“Can’t you change into more formal attire? You do know the family is going to visit.”
“You never bothered about what I wore when you met me. I thought you rather liked seeing me like this. Anyway, I’m going to take a bath later, I’ll think what I can wear later.” Neji only narrowed his eyes more because of that statement and turned to folding the newspaper and placing it on the side of the table, sipping his coffee, two ravens of seven years and a blonde in the same height as them constantly swaying their feet under the table back and forth, not bothering to understand what their parents were talking about. Just that their granpa’s visiting with their aunts and uncles and there’re going to have many gifts after.
“Mama is uncle Sasuke going to come too?” Maria looked up to Naruto who was scooping him his serving of omelet, hotdogs and fried rice just like the others and received a bright smile from the blonde.
“Of course, he never misses right? After this you go and clean up your rooms, so your gramps will give you rewards after ‘k?”
“Aww cleaning again? But I wanna play with Nozomi and Hakuto later. And ‘m gonna be tired if I clean up now…”
“You wouldn’t have to clean if you weren’t being messy in the first place.” The raven with the reminiscent eye lines beside Maria answered with cool indifference to his whining, which the youngest raven beside him nodded to.
“Psh, shut it neat freak. I’m a kid, I should be messy, right mom?”
“Well I don’t know if your father’d agree with that. Since he is a self proclaimed neat freak too.”
“Hn.”
“How about I help you clean up Mari, and then you can play with your little brothers later.”
“Are they still sleeping?” Hikari asked, looking at the dining room’s exit, looking at the western living room to the stairs leading to the second floor.
“Hm? Ah-” A squeaky whine erupted from the room upstairs, cutting off most of what Naruto would like to say and the family looked up to the direction of the stairs. The blonde couldn’t help but sigh at the noise, removing his apron to walk to the stainless bottle sterilizer that had cooled off minutes ago and put appropriate servings of milk powder in a pair of eight ounce bottles. “Well, I guess that answers your question Hikari. You guys go on and eat, Nagi, you lead the prayer. I’ll be back.”
And the blonde scurried out the dining room, climbing the stairs with hurried steps and opening the room closest to the corner just beside the master’s bed room and was welcomed with a pair of crying babies, pallid eyes unclear with their tears and the snivel already running down their parted mouths.
Naruto walked to the crib which used to hold the triplets when they were still in their younger state and hushed the twins with gentle fingers pruned from washing the clothes earlier. They both inherited their father’s eyes and hair, proving of the Hyuga’s strength in the genes, it had been two years since they had married.
And because he was legally registered as a male, Neji had to do a lot of office work to fabricate those documents with a considerable amount of money but in Naruto’s opinion it was a lot of bucks to bribe the registrar of the family registry in their place. Without much fuss about the populace they had married with very little people involved, just the inner circle of the family in the judge’s office which was Higashi’s close friend and since Naruto was already ripe of age in his twentieth year his parents’ presence weren’t needed, though inside of him he still hoped that his father would forgive him.
Two years after their marriage, after their four years of being together, the twins were born. Unbelievably during those six years that they’ve been together, even though Sasuke and Sayuri were married first their marriage remained without children, even though Kiba and Hinata already had Yuuhi months after their marriage.
The house that Naruto had inherited from his real father in Kobe was renovated to a western house mansion, because the location was near to the metro and only a bus away from the town’s amenities they didn’t have any problem moving. He was reluctant at first, to leave the apartment which held so much memories especially the baby room which his friends and Neji had helped arrange. But his husband had promised that it will stay as it was and never be allowed to be inhibited by anyone except them if they wanted to return to Tokyo.
He dropped from University and had just recently went back, achieving a class A certificate to teach in an elementary school downtown which his children was also attending they pretty much embraced family life whole heartedly. Except that from time to time the issue about Sasuke would be brought up by Neji, which Naruto had a difficult time handling but Neji wasn’t the only one having problems. It was because recently Neji’s secretary would frequently pop before their doorstep to stay over to help Neji with some cases since the man did the most of his work online.
Naruto wasn’t the type to get jealous or be bothered with trivial matters, however, when you’re always getting the chance to accidentally see a refined shapely woman, with well manicured nails, voluptuous painted lips, curly brown hair and big boobs flaunting her cleavage covered only in a strip of tube over a revealing coat laughing with your husband, hitting his shoulder playfully and sometimes tripping over her high heels to get caught in your dense husband’s arms which looked a little too done on purpose… wouldn’t you want to bash her head too? And the bastard looked like he was enjoying getting a rise from Naruto, the jerk.
He too was never one to be bothered by what his appearance would be to other people, but now he would always find himself looking disgruntled in front of the mirror. Was he getting fat or was it just neurosis from conversing with Chouji next door too much?
Naruto gently put down the twins to walk on the rubber covered floor, the baby room had the same designs as the one they had in the apartment and the rectangular plywood hanging on the wall spanning it almost entirely opposite the crib was now crowded with picture frames of various designs with pictures of the children and the Hyuga family including the few ones with Sasuke.
“Hello little babies!!!” Not long after Naruto had put the children down Maria burst into the door running towards the chubby twins with a rice still stuck on his cheek, followed by a quiet Nagi and a sighing Hikari. The blonde boy embraced the twins in a bear hug, the twins in turn giggling at the contact.
“Mari, what are you doing here? Have you finished breakfast already?” Their mother asked while picking the toys left littered on the floor from their playing last night.
“Uhn, we’ve already finished. And father’s got a visitor anyway, so we already left.”
“A visitor?” Naruto squeezed the orange fox plushie in his hand, something about the word visitor didn’t sound right to his ears, and the grip on the toy hardened even more when he heard the familiar shrill laugh of the said visitor.
Speaking of the damn devil.
“It’s that woman again. I thought today’s dad’s day off.” Hikari went to help his mother tidy up the crib, removing toys in there and Nagi followed while Maria rolled on the floor with the twin one year olds.
“He never stops working.” Nagi muttered, it was the first sentence he had spoken in the morning.
“Ah, I just remembered, we had to think of what I’ll cook for lunch later, Maria how about we go shopping for grocery, how’d you like that?” A forced smile was ignored by Maria’s ‘hurrah’, but Hikari, being the most observant of the two noticed the difference, he knew there was something he didn’t like about that flashy woman.
“Nagi, can you go down and check the stock in the cupboard, list some things we need to buy.”
“I’m going to stay here and watch the house for you mom, gramps and the others may arrive earlier, and dad wouldn’t be able to entertain them with HER around.”
“Thanks Hikari.” Hikari let Naruto ruffle his jet black hair, every time he would look at him, the way he carried himself, his self discipline and the observant gaze, everything about Hikari seemed to shout the name Uchiha all over while Nagi was quiet and shy, although he held the confidence of an adult and could interact well with the others if he wanted, during nursery Naruto asked Nagi why he was so quiet, he answered because he felt it unnecessary to talk about useless things, too troublesome. Now that had reminded him of someone.
He took half an hour longer in the bath than usual, mostly spent fussing over his hair trimmed to the style he had way before he met Neji, in front of the mirror he noticed first the firm and long thighs he had acquired through repeated climbing of the stairs in the school an the subway, his four packs he regained after a year of conceiving and shoulders broader, and that straight scar running from below his navel down to the area before the hairy part.
Wherever he looked, he was a guy, his knuckles were larger, his jaw was more angular although the shape of his eyes gave the impression of a fox smiling, his voice had deepened when he hit the final stages of puberty at nineteen. Come to think of it, what did Neji like about him? When they first met, he looked every part a woman because of the sudden imbalance in his hormones, making him look more like a woman. Did he like big chests? Naomi’s skin was flawless and pearly white… I bet she didn’t have those stretch marks like the ones on his hips and at the back of his knees.
He had never once thought of that scar to be something that would bother him, to be truthful he was proud of that scar, that was where his children came from after all but now remembering Naomi’s flawless skin he just felt a little too embarrassed to let others see it especially to Neji.
“Where are you going?” Naruto paused from closing the door leading to the front gate to look over his shoulder with a smile, Maria in his hand and the two others seeing him off.
“Oh, sorry I wasn’t meaning to not leave without saying anything. Just some grocery shopping, be back before lunch. Nagi will take care of the babies.”
“In THAT clothing again?” Neji was always used to seeing people either dressed in suits or formal dresses, not some tank top covered with a jacket and jeans. And that was what he was exactly seeing while he was narrowing his eyes from the top of the stairs after he came out of the study, he didn’t want to be particular why he silently hated seeing those clothes, it just gives more proof to the myth about blondes being considered as sex symbols wherever they go, and Naruto just gives that kind of aura every damn time he wasn’t in loose long sleeve shirts and in an apron.
“What, I changed didn’t I? Besides, it’s just grocery shopping. I don’t need a suit for that, do I?” The blonde said in a joking manner, but the older man’s crease on his forehead just deepened than it was already earlier.
“Bring the car with you.”
“Nah, I’m taking a taxi, you know I’m still not confident about my driving skills, you don’t want me crashing your precious car do you? Do you want me to buy you something? Mild Seven?”
“No, just… that outfit-” And the long-haired man’s brow twitched.
“Oh come on Neji, I’m going, no one in their right mind would harass someone in a grocery store, much less a guy, and with kids. Mari’s there, he’ll kick their butts if there was any.”
“Yeah daddy! I’m gonna kick some assesses! Don’t worry I’ll protect mommy!”
“And I’m going to protect dad. Leave him to me.” Naruto fought the urge to chuckle at Hikari’s wink, it seemed he wasn’t the only one feeling uneasy about that woman.
“What protecting are you talking about Hika-”
“Dad can I hang out in your study for a while? I want to see some info about Ted Bundy.”
“Ah, alright. You can come when you want.” Out of the three Neji found relation to Hikari more, not that he was having favoritism, just that Hikari’s liking to Neji’s work drew the two closer unlike what Naruto had thought, since Hikari was the spitting image of his real dad even with the eye lines.
While Maria wanted to be an Interpol detective with his keen sense of smell to clues and endless patience (he always finds Neji’s car keys whenever it’s missing), Hikari’s dream was to be a lawyer like his dad (he cornered the guilty candy stealer in their school when he was in nursery), and Nagi who was the quietest of the three had the most ambitious dream of all. CIA he said, secretive and a young genius following after his two older brothers, with his ability to adapt to any kind of situation, sharp common sense and the personality of being abnormally calm even in disasters (like when his favorite ant collection escaped or when he was trapped in the elevator), he’d have no problem passing.
“Neji, what’s your son doing in here?” Naomi asked in a near annoyed tone, the boy raising an eyebrow towards her while he was facing his own laptop on a mini table in the corner of Neji’s study room, his little office, Neji had branded fondly.
“Just let him. He’s not going to bother us, Hikari just wants to hang out here to kill time.” The long haired man already in his mid thirties took his seat on the swivel chair, ignoring Naomi’s quiet huffing as she took the seat in front of Neji’s table and started to look on the files for their current case.
“Doesn’t he want to play with his brothers?”
“Nagi’s playing with the kids in the other room. My wife left for the grocery so he had nothing to do.”
“Oh? Then, it’s only the two of us-” Naomi’s hazel brown eyes darted towards the unaware man’s chest, she’d had a crush on him since her first day at work, she couldn’t believe he’d get swallowed by a flat chest girl with a crotch to boot.
“Dad your button’s loose, you’ll catch cold.” Neji blinked at his son’s sudden joining in the conversation, realizing that his button really was loose and showed off the beginning of his chest, so with methodical hands he buttoned them up before sizing up the plaintiff’s profile.
And Naomi’s gaze shot through the boy’s own, eyes clashing and narrowing, Hikari just smirked before going back to his ‘research’.
“So that thing I found lying in mom and dad’s room is called a con… conn…dom…?” The raven muttered straining his eyes to pronounce the word better, he had always liked learning new words, before his head snapped to his father’s direction only to see that his father’s coffee had gone through the wrong passage.
“Neji you alright?”
“Hn, so what’s that tube of K-Y used for?” Hikari went back to his researching and found the look of his father’s blushing face interesting, it was needless to say Neji became awkwardly self conscious after that. He should tell this interesting new discovery to Maria and Nagi later.
+++
“Is that all Mari?” Naruto looked over to his son beside him who was reading the list of things they needed to buy, a cart full of food and household things.
“Nope, we’re still missing one.”
“Eh? I thought we had it all checked out.”
“You still hadn’t bought a police car and magnifying glass.”
“What’re we going to use a magnifying glass fo-” The blonde’s mouth stopped midway, his mouth shaped in an ‘o’ closing into a grin.
“Tsk, tsk, you’re a hundred years too early to fool me Maria Uzumaki Hyuga. We’re going.”
“But mommmmmy… it’s just ten dollars, over there, and there’s also some toys for bargain sale… two aisles from here. Look, look!” Naruto raised a brow, his son’s memory really works when it comes to the things he like, but the blonde folded his arms, a stern look on his face, and his smaller version already knew, that there was no touching that budget until Christmas.
“Let’s go to the counter.” Once again he ignored his son’s trembling lips, eyes already in the verge of crying when a familiar silk laced voice, cold and deep called out to them from behind.
“Naruto?”
His hair had grown a little, but the last time they saw each other, Sasuke was taller, now they were nearly standing eyes to eyes, just an inch or two probably because his growth spurt shot up when he hit twenty, making his limbs longer than they already were. The raven was dressed for the first time in Naruto’s opinion in a casual outfit, pink button down shirt with the sleeves folded up to the elbow and loose jeans. If the guy introduced himself as a college student, he’d passed as one.
“Uncle!!!!” Maria came squealing as he ran towards his favorite uncle, well, Kiba’s his favorite uncle too, but he felt much closer towards the raven for some reason. Sasuke chuckled at the incoming little squirt, he squatted, arms outstretched ready to accept the attack and he braced his butt to hit the floor when Maria jumped towards him.
“Hello, how’s the little inspector doing? Did you get some bad guys behind jaily?”
“Yeah! Yeah! You know there’s this bully at school! He likes to do wedgy and put spiders in Sachi’s shoes, so what I did…”
Years back, Naruto couldn’t have imagined Sasuke laughing freely in front of others, or baby talking in the least. Somehow, the children’s coming into his lives had changed him for the better, but there was one thing Naruto wanted so bad to disappear in his personality, because although his assholeness faded it didn’t disappear altogether.
“Oi dobe, what’re you daydreaming over there about. Hurry up. We’re eating out.”
Immediately Naruto snapped out of his musings, fake glaring towards the bastard in front of him with that trademark smirk Hikari seemed to have inherited and just followed the two towards the counter.
“Hey what are you doing here anyway? I thought you’d come with the rest?”
“I did, they went straight to your house, I just stopped by at the store opposite here to get some things. I saw you from the window so I came here.” The beeping of that machine in the cashier area repeatedly echoed in the background of their conversation.
“Eh? Why so early? I haven’t even cooked for them.”
“I live just an hour from here, they’re further so I think they’re still on the road, and they still had to pick up dog breath and his wife.”
“Where’s Sayuri by the way?”
“She couldn’t come this time, she’s busy with work. That’s the only thing she can occupy herself with for the mean time.”
“What, she’s still taking pills?” At that Naruto was distracted by the cashier’s voice, and he opened his wallet to give a lump estimation of the cost of the groceries while Maria took the privilege of taking the loose change. And he was surprised at the answer Sasuke had given him.
Giving Naruto a smile that looked like he was trying to laugh while having a constipation Sasuke said, “That’s the problem, she’d stopped taking them a long time ago.”
What was next was silence, and Naruto hopped into the seat beside the driver’s while Sasuke put the groceries together with his own in the trunk of his car, Maria had dozed off halfway in Sasuke’s arms inside the store and continued to nap even when he was put to lie on the back of the seat.
“It’s half past ten, we should get going I should be cooking lunch right now.”
“Yeah.” Maneuvering the stirring wheel as the engine began to heat up, the eye catching audi quattro left the parking space of the department store. But the timing of the traffic was right for them to continue their conversation earlier.
“She’s infertile. We tried couple of times already, even consulted a physician for methods but as you can see there was no result.”
“Why?”
“The doctor said it was stress, the emotional kind, even without that I just found out her relatives from his father’s side had a history of infertility and with her constant work, alcohol and cigarettes…”
“What did she say about it? Stress… I don’t see any reason why she should have that kind of problem, I mean every time I see her she’s always laughing.”
“You know Naruto, you’re very alike in many ways… She knew about us and the kids but she pretended she didn’t know, always laughing, and because she was aware that our marriage was for convenience, not healing herself appeared to be some sort of rebellion on her side. I was at fault too, since I let her think that I could like her. Normally if the whole clan was still alive, they would immediately suggest for separation but… somehow I pity her.”
“That’s new.” The cars advanced a little further, but they had been in that same spot for thirty minutes already. “Are you sure it’s not something else? Maybe you’d liked her on the way without you realizing yet and just taking it as some kind of pity for her.”
“You think I don’t know myself Naruto? Up till now…” Naruto stripped his gaze away from Sasuke’s eyes, facing the front instead and quickly putting his hand back on his lap when he felt the cool deft hand of the Uchiha crawling up to his.
“The traffic’s loose already. Let’s go.”
+++
“Where have you been?” Neji’s stern appearance was the first to welcome his line of vision the moment he stepped outside the car.
“Sorry I was late, there was a traffic jam along the overpass so-” Neji’s eyes shot directly to the man emerging from the driver’s seat, but Sasuke remained indifferent to the Hyuga, in time he had learned to let the hostility in those pair of pallid lilac eyes he would always get whenever they would see each other slide and went to carry the sleeping Maria from the car who had woken up from his father’s hissing growl.
“Whatever, they’ve been waiting for you for two hours already. If Naomi wasn’t here you’d have starved the whole family.”
“Where’re the kids?”
“Washing the dishes, something you’re supposed to do. Get inside.”
“Ma? Is dad angry or something? He looks piss.” Maria said drowsily, rubbing his eyes and not noticing the snort that had escaped Sasuke’s mouth at the misuse of the word.
“Go on inside and greet them. We’ll just get the things from the car okay?”
“Okay!” Pretty soon a chorus of ‘brat’, ‘so cute’ and questions about Naruto echoed from inside the house and Kiba burst outside the door like a dog depraved of food for so long, nearly jumping Naruto as he screamed his name at the top of his lungs.
Naruto’s muffled whimper at being squished against the man’s chest was ignored as he was held by the shoulders and stripped from the company of Kiba’s chest and in front of a pair of scrutinizing brown eyes.“Naruto dude I so fucking missed you man!!! Wait, there’s something wrong here.”
“Kiba?” Without any hint of warning the brunette zipped the jacket down to expose his black tank top and let out an inhuman shriek as Kiba raised the blonde’s shirt. “Kiba what the fuck are you doing asshole!?”
“Yup, still there.”
And Nozomi’s rattle came in direct contact with the back of Kiba’s head. “Ow, shit Shino that’s the third one in a day!!!” Which happened to be what Shino was holding earlier when he followed Kiba out the living room, tsk, tsk, tsk, those two never changed, and apparently Shikamaru too, he was still the lazy fine arts bastard that he was when Naruto first met him, it didn’t change even when he changed his course to political science.
Kiba’s whining as he repeatedly rubbed the bruised part was ignored as Shino and Shikamaru went outside to welcome Naruto, receiving welcome embraces from the two. “Unfortunately Kiba, unlike in Naruto’s case fatherhood didn’t do any good to your idiocy.”
“It only got worse, apparently.” Shikamaru yawned, he barely had the time to sleep since he had finished his theses in political science.
“What, I was just making sure he didn’t grow boobs in the one year that we’ve been apart.” The pony-tailed man and Shino nodded at this, Naruto’s features had grown manlier than the last time they had seen him, hot was the word, and looking at his hair cut which reminded him of his teenage years and the clothes they couldn’t help but agree.
“Clothes really do make the man, eh Shika?”
“Quit going on about my clothes! They’re casual, CASUAL. What’s wrong about it? Even though they’re old, they still fit, so I don’t find any reason why I shouldn’t wear it. Besides… I’ve had enough of wearing maternity dresses.”
“Hn, it really does.” Sasuke mused loudly with a smirk, before going inside with the groceries Naruto was supposed to be carrying.
“Eh?”
“He means we should go inside already dumbass.” Kiba then picked up the paper bags from the trunk which was what Sasuke had bought, and the two followed.
What followed after was a series of bear hugs, kids squealing in the living room and a lot of exchanges of conversations about what had happened last year, the winter was fast approaching, you can smell it in the mid-autumn air with the fast shedding of the leaves, the sky being colored with russet browns and deep oranges during sunsets and your feet sinking with ginko leaves in your front and backyard.
The nights would be colder than when it was summer, navy blue sky bright with the waning moon studded with beads of stars flooding the night sky. But Naruto didn’t have the time to notice those things for now, because he was concentrating not to walk out the living room because of Neji.
Ever since they had arrived, Neji kept bitching about his tardiness earlier, he was silent through the reunion and when he did talk it either had a hidden barb against his inability to be a housewife or just plainly making the blonde’s ears almost bleed with his grunting. Naruto was aware that the family had noticed this but was just trying to ignore, the bastard was embarrassing him already as it is, and what’s worst, in front of the infuriating secretary who still couldn’t get a life after staying longer than she was expected.
“Well then, I’ll be going Neji, Mr. Hyuga and the family, I apologize for bothering you.” Naomi cheerfully bowed, secretly giggling inside as the sparks flew between the distance of the brunette and Neji’s blonde wife because of the glare she was receiving.
“I’ll take you to the terminal. It’s already dark for you to walk alone this time of night.” Some part of Naomi jumped and inwardly cheered for herself at the offer but that thought quickly left her as she heard the c.d. case Naruto was holding snap with its crisp cracking sound.
“Ahh… no, my car’s just in the corner since the garage was already full. Don’t worry, I can take care of myself.”
“At least allow me to drive you to the terminal. I’ve already bothered you with going here from Tokyo.”
“Well, I guess if you insist.”
“Take care Ms. Naomi, that lunch you made was very tasty. You’d make a good housewife.” Hiashi had said that only as a parting greeting, it had always been in his personality to leave a good impression with others since Naruto once told him that he looked rather strict, he didn’t expect though, for his niece to find another excuse to make his wife feel worse.
“I bet.” Naruto fought the urge bury the edge of the c.d. case he was holding in Neji’s eyes as those lilac colored orbs darted towards him, that’s it, he’d had enough, screw not being able to have sex with him for the few months of his recovery, that bastard was going to sleep alone in his bed tonight!
He was thankful Kiba and the rest were in the baby room upstairs playing with the children and Hiashi was the only one to notice the tears already welling up in his eyes, so with a barely hidden shaking of his voice. “I’ll go wash the dishes.”
But instead of staying in the kitchen, his feet brought him inside the bathroom and locked himself inside, sitting himself on the rim of the bathtub he pondered on why Neji kept bitching about things like some sulking teenager who didn’t get to attend a party he liked and was rebelling with as much perseverance as he can, during those moments, tears he had been holding up for the half of the day began to stream freely down his cheeks, and even though his chest hurt and his throat felt like it was burning, he felt as if a weight had just been lifted off his shoulders.
So he thinks I’m not an effective wife? Fucking retard, he couldn’t even get a damn egg fried if I wasn’t there to keep it from burning the entire house!
Well he could just shove it to his ass, that bitch is to blame for all this! Imposing herself on my family like some know-it-all perfect woman and that bastard for letting her flirt with him! If Hikari wasn’t around who knows what they could’ve done inside that damn study room! I’m not even allowed to step inside it if it wasn’t for something important!
He hoped after this he would be able to put up a convincing façade to the family.
Apparently, it didn’t work for the Uchiha. Naruto couldn’t remember how long he’d stayed inside, but when he finally decided to leave, what welcomed him was the unexpected appearance of the raven haired man in front of him the moment he opened the bathroom.
He was sure his eyes didn’t look that sore in the mirror.
*OH my *Beep*ing GOD! I actually exceeded the ten chapter limit!? *Beep* me I’m dreaming!!!! Have you noticed I’ve been using the ‘f’ word quite a lot? It’s become one of my favorite words… hurrah for the *Beep*ing censorship!