Parthenogenesis

Chapter 12: Leaving Konoha

“Dobe.” The voice that said this was definitely not amused. Annoyed, yes. Amused, hell no. Sasuke had just gone through Naruto’s travel bag- the one that should have the necessities of life in it for their travels over the next few months, at least – only to find it crammed full of ramen. Oh, that dobe.

“Naruto,” laughed Sakura, who was seeing the two off. “You’re such an idiot when it comes to ramen.”

“Or just an idiot in general,” corrected Sasuke in a disenchanted monotone, dumping the ramen out of the bag and hoping that there was something else in the bag besides ramen, like a tent, or a blanket, or maybe a change of ramen-printed boxers. Anything. His hopes were in vain.

“Hey!” protested Naruto, sputtering as Sasuke dumped all of his ramen onto the couch in his apartment. The rest of the old team 7 had come to his apartment to see the two of them off. “Ramen is the perfect food!” Naruto bellowed through the apartment complex.

Sakura laughed again at him. “How so? It tastes terrible and is bad for you. Trust me, I’m a mednin.”

“No, no ,no. You see, ramen is cheap so you can survive off it for a long time. It has tough packaging that’s hard to damage. It takes a lot to spoil it and, because there are so many flavors, it never gets old!”

“Now, you see, Sakura. This is why you don’t argue with Naruto about his ramen- it makes you lose your hearing for a week. Naruto, try to keep your voice down,” scolded Kakashi, cleaning the wax out of his ear with his pinky.

“Dobe, what else do you have to pack to take?” asked Sasuke interrupting Naruto from responding to Kakashi. Sasuke had now packed a selection of healthier travel-foods into the blond’s bag- no ramen.

“My Ramen!” he yelled.

“Na-ru-to,” Sasuke pronounced each syllable by itself in his annoyance. He took a deep breathe. “You need to eat healthier.” He pinned Naruto with look that said, ‘Just try to go against me.’ Sasuke wanted the dobe to eat healthier- especially now that he was an expectant mother…er…father…er…something.

Naruto understood Sasuke’s concerns, he let his hand rest over his flat belly. He conceded, “Alright…only 10 packs of Ramen then.”

The entire room had one unanimous sweat-drop. The youngest Uchiha gave in and packed the 10 packs of ramen, knowing it was the best he would get out of the stubborn blond.

“Where’s the rest of your stuff, dobe?”

“Teme! Stop calling me that! And I sealed the rest of my stuff in scrolls!”

Sure enough, Sasuke now noticed a belt of scrolls around the blond’s middle.

“And you didn’t seal your food into a scroll because?” asked the Uchiha.

“I wanted easy access to the ramen!” responded Naruto like it was common sense.

Sasuke resisted the urge to bang his head on something hard, really hard. “Let’s go, dobe.”

“Ahh…Kakashi-sensei! Why do only the two of them get to go on a mission? Why can’t all of us go?” whined Sakura.

“Because Hokage-sama only said they were allowed to go,” answered Kakashi.

“Bye then, Sasuke-kun! Maybe we can go on a date when you get back!” offered Sakura cheerfully. She may be going out with Lee these days, but once a fan-girl always a fan-girl. It’s like a disease, and fan-girls just can’t wash the hope that Sasuke might actually like one of them out of their system. However, contary to how it had once been, now, when Sakura received the patented Uchiha glare, she didn’t feel so rejected. She merely turned to the blond putting on his back-pack. “Naruto,” she waved goodbye to him. “I have to get to the hospital for my shift. Both of you, come back safe okay?”

“Hai, Hai, Sakura!” said the blond. “Don’t worry! We’ll be back before you know it!”

“Hn,” agreed the Uchiha, just in not so many words.

She gave them each a final look that said, ‘You’d better come back,,or else I’ll kill you.’ Then she left.

However, Sasuke and Naruto could still not talk freely, because their sensei was still there reading his perverted orange book. Without looking up from his book, Kakashi threw two badly wrapped gifts to them. By the time they had caught them, Kakashi was gone, with a “You two have fun” floating in the air. It was kind of spooky actually.

Naruto excitably unwrapped his present. Sasuke followed at a slower pace, fearing the worst from their perverted teacher.

He was right to fear. Very right.

The smile fell off of Naruto’s face faster than blood would fall from Jiraiya’s nose if a hot woman walked by. It was a copy of Icha Icha Paradise, a Yaoi version. ‘Oh.’

Sasuke’s gift was the same thing, only with a bottle of lube attached along with a note. In Kakashi handwriting it said, “If you get any ideas from this book, be sure to use protection.”

Sasuke felt his cheeks heat up. Damn, where did his facial control go?

“So, what did Kakashi-sensei give you?” asked Naruto, breaking the perverted thoughts that were running rampantly through the Uchiha’s head.

“Hn,” said Sasuke trying to regain his composure. The book and lube mysteriously vanished into one of the pockets in his flak jacket in the blink of an eye. “Nothing. You?”

“Nothing at all.” However, the blond said that as he was tucking something into his orange vest. Sasuke raised a brow as the kitsune boy nervously scratched the back of his head, but the Uchiha didn’t catch him on it- that would mean revealing his own gift from Kakashi. Naruto cleared his throat, “So, ah, are we ready to head off?”

“Hn…” said the Uchiha,

“OKAY! LET’S GO THEN!”

O0o.o0O

Tsunade sat doing her paperwork, for once. Her eyelids began to feel heavy and she almost began to dose off. Almost, until she felt a familiar chakra signature. She straightened up as a poof of smoke and a swirl of leaves appeared before her desk.

“Kakashi-san,” she greeted.

“Yo,” he waved, his nose in his orange book.

Tsunade’s eyebrow twitched. How dare he read that perverted excuse of literature in her office! She would give him a piece of her mind.

“I don’t buy it,” he said before she could say anything.

“What?” she asked.

“You would grant two of your best ninjas extended leave for a training mission, together? You’re trying to hide something.”

“That’s ridiculous, Kakashi-san. Why would I lie?”

“That’s what I asked myself: Why would you lie?” he said, putting his book away and looking his Hokage square in the eye. “But that’s not what I’m worried about.”

“Then what are you worrying about?” she asked, a flash of dangerous promise in her eyes.

“Akatsuki.”

“Excuse me.”

“You assigned me to protect Naruto from the Akatsuki, but now you have sent him out of my protection with Uchiha Sasuke.”

“Well, you’ve already said yourself that he’s one of the best. I don’t see why you’re worried. And it’s not your place to meddle, Kakashi-san. I am the Hokage, not you,” said Tsunade, beginning to straighten the papers on her desk.

“If a certain member of Akatsuki, say Uchiha Itachi, comes for Naruto, then Sasuke may lose himself. He may forget about Naruto,” explained Kakaski.

“Are you saying that you think I do not know Naruto’s limits and that I would endanger the boy that’s like a son to me?”

“No, I’m saying that Naruto does not make very wise decisions when he’s around Sasuke. The two of them have something…unique.”

“Rivalry is what you are talking about, correct?” asked Tsunade.

“No, I’m talking about something that started as rivalry about six years ago. But now, after Naruto brought Sasuke back from Orochimaru, it’s something more.”

“I don’t understand what you are insinuating.”

“I’m saying that Naruto is going to be hurt, and it won’t be physically. Naruto is in love with Sasuke, and I believe Sasuke feels the same for him, but once Itachi comes into the picture…”

Tsunade blinked at the realization. Now it made sense. The derisive nicknames and all the bickering were only the two flirting. Their constant spars were probably like foreplay. And the way they looked at each other when the other wasn’t looking. It made sense. ‘Damn, why are all of my good ninja gay!?!’

“I don’t think you have anything to worry about,” said the Hokage dismissively, thinking about the children Naruto was now carrying, Sasuke’s children. ‘Sasuke will protect what’s his.’ Kakashi noticed the tone of finality in the Hokage’s voice and got ready to leave (out the window, of course), but Tsunade called after him, “If it makes you feel any better, I sent them to Jiraiya.”

Kakashi’s one eye turned into and upside down “u.” His poor, poor students. With the influence of his presents (Icha Icha Paradise, Yaoi Version) and Jiraiya’s perversion, his students were likely to get together a lot sooner than one could say, “Icha Icha Paradise is the best.”

Little did he know of Naruto’s current status of carrier for Sasuke’s children. The scarecrow had no clue that the boys were already making their own strives at having a relationship.

O0o.o0O

Not all strives for a relationship go without a hitch or two, especially not when the two people involved are some of the most stubborn people in all of Konoha, perhaps even in all of Fire Country. Yet as similar as they were, they were as different as a summer day and a winter night. Sasuke was mostly a genius, except when it came to people-skills. Naruto was an idiot, most of the time. He had moments of brilliance- mainly in battle and nearly always when discussing ideals or views on life. But, let’s face the facts: he could be a real screw-up sometimes. Blame it on his up-bringing (or the lack of it), or blame it on the fact that no one ever taught him social norms, like earlier that day, when they had stopped mid-afternoon in a small town bordering Konoha. Of course, it wasn’t his fault that the other guy backed his chair up, right in front of where Naruto was walking. You could even stretch it and say it wasn’t entirely his fault that he tripped over said chair and fell flat on his face. However, it was defiantly the blond’s fault for getting himself and his unlucky companion (Sasuke) chased over 10 miles by the man Naruto had yelled at for tripping him, especially since the man was an elite foreign hunternin, with a scroll that granted him protection from Konoha shinobi (signed by the Hokage herself) as he hunted down a missing nin from his own country. Not being able to do anything by law, Sasuke and Naruto had to run for it, blasts of fire shooting over their shoulders and singeing their hair.

They had just lost the foreign hunter nin when Naruto fell down a canyon. That was Naruto’s fault too. If he had just looked before he stepped… Sasuke cleared himself of his anger and focused on saving Naruto.

“Why can’t you just walk up with chakra, dobe?”

“Teme! My chakra is not exactly cooperating right now. Just lower a rope or something before I lose my grip!”

He had a hold on a small tree growing off a small shelf in the canyon that was somehow miraculously supporting his weight…for now. Naruto carefully transferred his weight to the shelf of rock and pulled himself up to it, waiting for a robe to drop from the heavens.

“You’re a jounin. How can you still be so stupid?” said Sasuke as he lowered the rope.

“I’m not stupid! Just unlucky! How was I supposed to know the ground would suddenly vanish like that and how was I supposed to know that guy I shouted at was a hunter nin? Honestly, it’s not like the guy had it tattooed on his clay mask!” shouted the blond as he tied the robe around himself.

Sasuke could feel a headache coming on. “Dobe! He was wearing a CLAY MASK! How many non-hunters wear clay masks?”

Naruto’s eyes squinted in thought . Yeah, he couldn’t think of any come-back to that one. “Still, Teme! He could’ve been nicer about it!”

Sasuke was hauling Naruto up, or trying to. “Dobe, how much do you weigh!”

Sasuke kept pulling and pulling, but Naruto wouldn’t come up any further.

“I might be carrying your children, teme, but that doesn’t give you any right to call me fat!” came Naruto’s shout. Naruto felt something on his clothing catching and searched around for it. “Oh, it’s my belt. It’s stuck on a corner of a rock. I’ll just take it off. Give me a sec.”

Naruto struggled with the buckle for a bit before he finally got it to unhook. However, as soon as the tension disappeared, Naruto went shooting up the canyon, leaving his belt to fall the rest of the way down into the ravine, then into a river, then down the river. ‘Figures. Of course there’s a river.’

“Teme! You made me lose my belt!” complained Naruto loudly as he tried to pull himself over the edge of the canyon.

“It’s not my fault you’re such an idiot, dobe.” Said Sasuke trying to help Naruto, only to have his hand slapped away by the blond. ‘He could do it himself, dammit!’

“But Sasuke! All my scrolls were on that belt!” He wheezed as he finally pulled himself over the edge and rolled onto his back to feel solid earth beneath him once more.

“Hn,” came the Uchiha’s response.

“TEME!” shouted Naruto. He fumed in silence for a few minutes until he remembered something that made him smile.

“Dobe, why are you so happy?” Sasuke asked suspiciously.

“I just remembered something.”

“What?”

Naruto’s smile got so big, he had to shut his eyes to accommodate it. “I just remembered that I still have my ramen, safe and in my backpack!”

Sasuke held back a sigh. That blond was quite an idiot sometimes. Too bad you can’t pick who your heart fancies.

“Naruto, you have to promise to be more careful from now on,” he told the blond, “It’s not just yourself that you have to look after anymore.”

“Bastard,” muttered Naruto, but not quiet enough that Sasuke couldn’t hear him, “Only caring about his bloodline in me. What an arrogant asshole. I feel like Uchiha breeding stock.”

Sasuke was at a loss for words. What do you say to something like that? It was true, and yet it wasn’t true. He really did care for the dobe, he just wasn’t sure how much he cared yet. Lust was one thing, but love was another. “Naruto,” he paused to think of what to say, “It’s not just the Uchiha children you’re carrying that make me worry. I’m just…”
He couldn’t think of what else to say.

“An asshole and a bastard,” Naruto finished for him.

“Maybe,” said the Uhiha absently, looking for the right thing to say, “but I just worry about all this because this could be my only chance to have two things I want: a relationship with you and the resurrection of my clan. I worry that it will be taken away from me like everything else has.”

That brought silence, even from the ever-loud, blond fox-container. After a while, Naruto said, “I’m sorry. I’ll try to be more careful. BUT!”

Sasuke nearly groaned, but, because he was an Uchiha, he suppressed it. He waited for the inevitable…

Naruto continued, “You have to treat me to ramen at each major town we stop at!”

Of course, that was the Uzumaki Method of Compromise.

They set off at a decent enough pace, always onward to the next town. It was mildly worrisome that they had just lost half of their supplies down the canyon, but both the Uchiha and the Uzumaki put that worry to the back of their minds. However, it would prove for interesting times the next time they had to camp out overnight…

TBC

A/N: Chapter 14 has a lime in it for those of you a little smut-thirsty. AND I hope to write a lemon for this story by chapter 16. Not quite there yet, though.