Death is the only way to freedom

Chapter 16: Wanna be mine forever?

"talk"
´thoughts´

Sasuke slowly opened his onyx eyes. His body felt a bit stiff and cold but he didn’t really care; the reason why he didn’t care was sitting right next to him. Shoulder against shoulder. The heavenly creature that snored peacefully with a strong arm around his waist was making it worth being cold.

The Uchiha smiled softly as he tried to memorize the blonde’s peaceful look before turning his gaze to the still sleeping city of the hidden Leaf. The early morning sun bathed the city and its buildings in a soft mix of yellow and red; beautiful.

“Morning” A soft yawn from the blonde made Sasuke look at a pair of half lidded blue eyes.

“Morning, dobe.”

“What time is it, teme?” The words were softly spoken as Naruto stretched his arms above his head with another yawn.

“Everyone is still in bed… guess we dosed off, nee,” the raven couldn’t help to stare at the exposed belly as the blonde’s t-shirt was lifted because of the movement.

“Yeah….Ah… my legs and ass feel numb,” he grinned as he slowly rose to his feet and brushed off his lovely behind. Naruto offered Sasuke a hand and helped the raven to his feet.

“Wanna go grab a bite to eat at my place?” Sasuke offered. “I have ramen!”

“Sure, teme,” the blonde chuckled. “Guess you finally accepted my addiction with ramen, nee?” Naruto grinned widely as he walked next to his friend towards the Uchiha district.

“I call it obsession, but yes I have,” Sasuke smirked back at the blonde. Things were finally going in the right direction again, much to the Uchiha`s liking.

“Say Sasuke?” The former fox container tapped the raven on the shoulder as they walked into the forest.

“Hnnn yeah?”

“Would you mind showing me the spot you picked for…Itachi?”

“Sure, anything for you,” the raven said calmly.

“Are you disappointed in me because he and I were together, though I knew who he was and what he had done?” the blonde asked with hesitation.

“I have no right to, Naruto… you tried repeatingly to save me from my loneliness… tried to tell me that you cared for me, even that you loved me… I betrayed you again and again. I thought that if I just…” He felt as if the words swelled up in his throat and stayed there. “I tried to convince myself that if I pushed you away… that if I hurt you… you could become happy… without me… even if it meant that I would be alone in the darkness.”

“…Stupid! The darkness will only try to consume you, Sasuke… true power lies in the power to protect those you care about… those precious to you,” the blonde sighed.

“Yeah… And I guess it suits me right that you found comfort in someone else’s arms… I’m not thrilled that it was Itachi… of all people though.”

“… Guess I have a weakness for tall, dark and handsome men with emotional issues,” the blonde smiled sadly at the raven.

“Yeah… And I guess we both had the same taste in men as well… I too, am drawn to your warm and comforting light, Naruto.”

“… Are you serious?” the blonde stopped walking and looked at the raven with a serious face.

“Why would I lie about something like that…? I’ve already told you that I’m sorry and that I care about you greatly.” Sasuke turned around to face Naruto. He acted cool on the outside but felt the pain and fear of being rejected on the inside.

“It`s just… it’s sort of a declaration of love or something… calling me something like that!” He pouted.

“I mean it; you are my light… you were always there for me… like a beacon of hope. I somehow knew that no matter what happened… that you would be there… for me. I know it’s selfish of me to want you to be there for me, Naruto… but that is who I am.”

“… you really are a bastard, Sasuke… but I guess I wouldn’t want you any other way. You are my friend and my most precious person even Itachi knew that!” the blonde jumped into a huge tree and sat down on a thick branch.

“What are you talking about?” Sasuke asked as he followed the blonde and seated himself opposite the blonde; his slender legs dangling freely as he straddled the branch.

“….eh… well, you see,” the blonde grinned in embarrassment and scratched the back of his neck nervously. He scolded himself for mentioning Itachi`s opinion like that.

“Spill it!” Sasuke was suddenly pinning Naruto`s hands above his head while pressing the blonde’s back against the trunk of the old oak. It never stopped to impress Naruto how fast Sasuke could be if he wanted to.

“…”

“Tell me or I’ll use the sharingan to force it out of you,” the Uchiha growled. Naruto could feel the raven’s hot breath against his face as the Uchiha was only inches away.

“Alright, alright… I’ll tell if you let go,” the blonde muffled. Naruto rubbed his reddening wrist with a pout.

“You didn’t have to be so rough, teme.”

“Hnnn.” Was the only response from the stoic Uchiha! “I`m waiting.”

“Impatient bastard,” the blonde mumbled as he made himself more comfortable on the hard and uneven branch.

“Did you say anything, dobe?” Naruto shook his head as he watched the coal-black eyes turn red.

“… Well here I go,” he cleared his throat and began to speak. “Itachi always told me that he thought that even though I was with him… I really wanted to be… with someone else instead… that what I really wanted… was you.”

“… and?”

“And?”

“Did you want to be with me… when you-“

“I might have imagined it… yes… sometimes,” The blonde looked up at the passing clouds. He didn’t want to face Sasuke right now… Naruto as if he somehow betrayed both Itachi`s memory and Sasuke`s feelings by telling Sasuke that he actually imagined that he was with Sasuke when he was in bed with his older brother.

“Naruto… look at me.” The raven reached out and touched a whiskered cheek. Naruto`s skin was so warm and smooth and Sasuke could only imagine that the rest of the blonde’s slender yet muscled body would be just as delightful to touch.

Cerulean blue eyes were captured by the coal-black orbs that belonged to the last living Uchiha.

“Naruto…” The distance between them was shrinking as the raven-haired slowly leaned closer to the slightly trembling blonde.

“Sasuke…” Naruto whispered as their foreheads and noses met. Naruto`s eyes slowly closed as he felt something brush against his lower lip. Was Sasuke brushing his thumb against his lips? Was the raven going to kiss him?

“Naruto?” The raven whispered softly.

“Yeah?” the blonde mumbled with his eyes still closed, still waiting for their lips to lock.

“Naruto?” The voice revealed a tiny bit of genuine amusement and something… that sounded like happiness.

“What?!” Blue eyes darted open and took in the smirking raven who was extending a hand to the blonde.

“Breakfast at my place? Or do you want to skip it for something else?” Both stared at Naruto`s suddenly growling stomach.

Sasuke knew better than to grope or kiss the blonde in an inappropriate way since the episode at the morgue yesterday. Naruto was attracted to him and would eventually be interested in more than friendship; of that the Uchiha was certain.

Friendship and innocent closeness was something the Uchiha could manage… for now. The risk of making a pass on his blonde was too scary… Sasuke would rather stay Naruto`s friend forever than lose the cheerful loudmouth that gave his live purpose and meaning.

“Heh... heh, guess breakfast at your place, teme!” the blonde chuckled as he grabbed the raven’s hand and let the Uchiha drag him to his feet.

~ # ~

“Mmmmm, that was so good,” the brunette had a wide and very happy smile on his face as he rested his head on his lover’s toned chest.

“Happy anniversary, Dolphin,” the silver-haired nin chuckled. “Wanna share the shower with me? I feel a bit sticky from the mutilated fruit, chocolate and you’re delicious cum.”

“Yeah,” Iruka blushed as he crawled out of the double bed with shaky legs. “Here, let me give you a hand,” the brunette offered his hand to his perverted lover.

“A hand eh? Is that all you wanna give me?” He smirked. Kakashi wrapped his arms around Iruka`s slender figure as soon as he was on his feet and licked Iruka`s soft lips.

“Well, let’s see what we can come up with,” giggled the brunette as he dragged his silver-haired lover into the bathroom to share a shower with him.

The two naked men stepped into the cubicle after Iruka had made clear that the water temperature was just right for both of them.

The hot water felt soothing on Iruka`s tanned skin. He smiled as he felt Kakashi`s hands on his back, washing him with circular movement. The sweet smell of strawberry scented soap found its way to his nose.

“I love you, dolphin,” the silver-haired nin whispered as he embraced the slightly younger sensei from behind.

“I love you too, love,” the brunette leaned his head back and let it come to a rest on the other man’s strong shoulder.

“Ruka?”

“Mmmmm?”

“I want you to stay with me forever.”

“I’d love to, Kakashi.”

“Iruka?”

“Yeah?”

“Will you marry me?” The brunette turned around and looked deeply into his lover’s eyes with a warm loving smile across his scarred face.

“Yes, Kakashi I will marry you,” Kakashi embraced his lover once more and felt the sparks of love, desire and happiness jolt through his body as his lover wrapped his arms around his neck and kissed his smiling lips repeating.

“You made me the happiest man in the world with those words, dolphin.” Kakashi felt like all his dreams were going to come true… now all he could wish for was another round of hot loving with his beloved dolphin.

Iruka kissed him again and stepped out of the shower.

“Yo! Where are you going?” Kakashi asked as he watched his lover wrap himself in a large towel and walk towards the door.

“I`m going to tell Naruto… I want him to be my best man,” Iruka grinned as he opened the door. “Maybe you should ask Sasuke to be yours!”

Kakashi`s eyes went wide at the man’s remark. Had Iruka been expecting him to propose? Had his dolphin already been secretly planning how it would be to get married to him?

He shrugged his shoulders with a smirk as he turned off the spray of water. Iruka was so sweet and Naruto could use some cheerful news. Kakashi knew that Iruka loved Naruto like a son and Naruto loved Iruka as if he was his dad.

And though Kakashi felt a bit jealous that Iruka was running off to his ´son´ instead of making sweet love to him… but Iruka was going to spend the rest of his life with Kakashi so a few hours here and there with their favorite blonde was gonna be fine.

~ # ~

“Say, Sasuke?” The blonde stretched his arms above his head and yawned. He was standing a few steps behind the Uchiha who was unlocking the front door of his house.

“Hmmm?”

“How does it feel to be home again?”

“…!” Sasuke turned around and looked at the blonde. He cocked his head to the side and let out a deep sigh. “Strange, I guess… I haven’t been here in years… “

“Oh, I wanted to clean but-“

“I know, Kakashi told me that you looked out for my place while I was gone… you didn’t have to Naruto!” The raven smiled softly at the blonde before turning his attention back to the door to unlock it.

“Yeah, I know… but I just wanted you to… feel… welcome… when you came home,” the blonde sighed.

“You never gave up on me, did you? You kept on seeing the good in me, even as I plunged my fist into your ribcage-“

“You never really wanted to kill me, Sasuke!” The blonde said seriously.

“How can you be so sure about that?” Sasuke turned the key in the lock and heard the small ´Click´ as it unlocked.

“I dunno… just a feeling in my gut.”

“A feeling in your gut? Telling you that I was going to spare you even though I mocked, betrayed and attacked you?”

“Yup!” Naruto gently placed a warm hand on the raven’s muscled shoulder.

Sasuke almost flinched under the soft touch. He was afraid that his body would betray him and that he would slam the dobe against the door and kiss him breathless if he stayed this close to Naruto.

“Hnnn, let’s go inside and get you some food,” the raven tried to think of innocent things, but the thought of feeding the dobe with fresh peeled fruit; mouth to mouth, made a certain part of his pants feel tight.

“Thanks teme, I`m starving.” Naruto grinned happily. Food and the company of Sasuke were leaving a feeling of warmth and something else inside of him. It was the feeling of fluttering butterflies, he could feel. The feeling he had always felt when Sasuke was close; he had felt like that ever since the day that the young Uchiha had saved his life at the bridge that now wore the blonde’s name; The great Naruto bridge.

Naruto followed Sasuke into the main house of the now almost extinct Uchiha clan, with a happy smile on his face. For the first time since the fight at that mountaintop, since Itachi`s death… he didn’t feel uncomfortable to smile. Ever since Itachi was dead as well as the demon fox, Naruto had felt hollow like an empty shell.

The fox had been a part of him for his entire life and the emptiness inside of him was new. It scared him and made him feel small and alone. The Kyuubi had always been his companion; an unwanted one, but still his partner… the fox always talked to him, and even if it was only a growl or a hiss, Naruto was never really alone.

He even wondered sometimes, if he had gone on babbling so much because he somehow feared to be alone with his thoughts and the fox… but being all alone, like he was now… was even worse.

“…Naruto?” Sasuke´s voice brought him back to reality.

“… Hmmm? Oh, I´´m sorry, teme, what did ya say?” The Uchiha raised a dark brow at the blonde’s mumbling voice. Something was bothering the blonde, but what?

“I asked what kind of ramen you want to eat? … Is everything alright?”

“Heh… heh, gomen Sasuke. Miso would be nice, if ya have it, the blonde smiled softly. “I just thought about the Kyuubi…”

“Do you wanna talk about it?” Sasuke asked as he prepared the instant food that his dobe loved so much.

“…”

“I understand if you don´t want to talk about the-“ The raven placed the steaming bowl of noodles in front of Naruto and sat down next to the blonde with his coffee, toast and eggs.

“It´s just… “The blonde sighed. He grabbed the chopsticks and dug into the ramen. “Kyuubi has been a part of my life for my whole life…it was always nagging, growling and hissing at me, edging me on to make me train harder… to become stronger… he was always there… I… I…” The blonde refilled his mouth with the steaming noodles.

“You feel lonely without the Kitsune, dont you?” Sasuke sipped at his coffee.

“Yeah… he was a pain in the ass… but he was still a part of me for so long. You left me to become stronger, Gaara died, lost his Bijuu and was revived. Kyuubi is dead… Itachi is dead… Where do I belong in all of this now, Sasuke? Is there a place for me in this world anymore?” Sasuke watched the blonde before he got up to prepare another bowl of ramen for the blonde. Naruto seemed caught up in his thoughts, which worried the raven.

Naruto was a smart guy, even though almost everyone thought otherwise. Naruto had played his role as class clown and happy loudmouth for so long that everyone thought that it was just the way he was. Sasuke knew better though.

Naruto was a talented shinobi, who was skilled in taijutsu , ninjutsu and had learned to handle genjutsu as well. The blonde could use his raw strength, speed and knew how to plan an attack.

“Of course there is a place for you here… after all you are the hero who defeated at least two Akatsuki members and dragged my sorry ass back to Konoha,” the raven said as he smirked and handed the refilled bowl to Naruto.

“I did, didn´t I,” the blonde chuckled. Sasuke smiled back at him, happy that the blonde smiled again.

“Besides that; you are never going to be alone again, dobe!”

“And what makes you so sure about that?” the blonde asked in suspicion.

“Because I´ll keep you company forever if you like!” The last Uchiha smiled at the wondering blonde.

~ # ~

Iruka ran down the street toward the huge brick apartment building in which Naruto was living in. Naruto had moved into this part of town when he had passed his jounin exam almost a year ago.

Iruka and the Hokage had finally been able to persuade the blonde to move into one of the bigger and more exquisite apartments in this part of town instead of his old home.

Naruto was now living in a two bedroom apartment on the third floor, and Iruka almost jumped up and down from excitement as he knocked on the wooden door to the blonde´s apartment.

KNOCK – KNOCK

Nothing happened. Iruka knocked again before calling out the blonde´s name.

No answer? Where could his favorite ex-student be? Naruto wasn´t back on active duty yet and he had been released from the hospital yesterday and Iruka was sure that the blonde would sleep in this morning for sure.

The academy teacher chuckled as he found his spare key and unlocked the door. Maybe the blonde was still asleep; snoring loudly with that hideous nightcap shoved down over his bright blonde hair.

Iruka stepped inside and looked around; everything was clean and neat… everything in its right place. He was happy that the blonde had finally learned how to keep his place tidy at all times. The brunette walked into the living room and continued into the kitchen. There were no signs of the blonde´s obsession with ramen to be found anywhere; no empty noodle cups and no chopsticks, strange!

Iruka scratched his chin but convinced himself that Naruto probably had been too tired to fix himself something to eat or he had been at Ichiraku´s on his way home. The latter was probably what had happened.

The brunette sighed with a smile at his favorite student´s obsession and walked towards the bedroom. He opened the door slowly and peaked inside; it was empty!

It seemed like the blonde had never even been back here in the first place. The bed was made, the plants were in need of watering and no sign of ramen anywhere. But if the blonde hadn´t been here last night… where had he spend the night and where was he now?

TBC