Parthenogenesis

Chapter 18: Perverts and Seals

Naruto woke up feeling worse for wear. He was still tired. He ached. His ass was sore. Well…that could be explained. Sasuke was still lying next to him in bed in all of his alabaster, muscled nakedness. But the worse thing for Naruto was his urgent need to pee. He pulled himself out of bed and groggily dragged his body across the hotel room and into the bathroom.

The sound of water tinkling into a larger body could be heard for a long period of time. Then a flush of toilet and then a long shout that roused Sasuke from his slumber faster than a bucket of cold water.

“Naruto!” he said urgently, recognizing the shout. He dashed from the bed and into bathroom to find his lover standing in front of the mirror, a bewildered expression on his face.

“What the hell are these?” he bellowed, fingering the bruised skin on his neck and the bite marks on his chest. Of course he would freak. The fox had always healed every little thing wrong with the boy before he could even look in the mirror to see it, from acne to hickeys. “That damn hairball!”

Naruto marched back into the room and took a meditative position on the ground. He was going to get to the bottom of all this! Naruto, however, missed the satisfied look Sasuke gave him when he eyed the dark bruising. Now, there was proof on Naruto’s very body that he was taken.

Naruto plunged himself into his own mindscape, angry as hell. He’d like to see Kyuubi’s blood lust compare to his today.

“Damn Fox! Bastard!” he shouted into the darkness, sloshing down the sewer through the ankle-high water. “What do you think you’re doing!? Playing around!?”

When he got in front of the bars though, he began to get worried. Kyuubi’s chakra was low. How could that be possible?

“Fox?” he called out uncertainly.

“Pathetic human. Why do you bother me? You have the entire world to tread. Why do you intrude on my little jail cell?”

Naruto’s anger came back. If he had the energy to be a smart-mouth, he must’ve been fine. “Hey, Kyuubi? What’s going on? Why have you stopped healing me? You have to pay rent, you know.”

The reply was a deep rumble. “I owe you nothing, mortal. And I will not be healing you anymore.”

“Eh? Why not!?” Naruto demanded.

“I do not have the energy. The kits are growing and I must maintain a womb of chakra at all times, and supply them with their needs. I cannot do this as well as heal you…unless I let some of them die…” Of course, what the demon didn’t mention was the fact that he was also beginning to siphon off his chakra into the YY child, the being that shouldn’t exist. He had to mold that child and fill in the missing DNA with his own so that the body could grow. But even as he did this and the child was growing, it was lifeless. Its small heart was beating, but it did not have a soul. However, with each bit of chakra the fox pumped into the little body, the weaker the seal became in this body. It would slowly fade and it would reform on the kit. With no soul to compete against…well…Kyuubi would be reborn in human form. No, not human. With him supplying the last links in DNA, his new body would be a hanyou. It would be an insult to any demon, but Kyuubi wanted any freedom he could gain.

Naruto’s eyes grew big. Let them die? Sasuke’s children? No way! Naruto would lose too much!

“Fine then, fox. Be that way. But when the time comes…I expect you to finally pay up.”

“Insolent brat! No one threatens me!” With a quick wave of chakra, Naruto was forced out of his mindscape.

“Damn fox…” he mumbled. He looked up at Sasuke. “Well, it looks like no more healing factor for me.” He tried to be cheery about it, but the thought scared him to death. Naruto was just too accident prone to not be able heal quickly. He’d be dead within in a week. Or so he was sure. Sasuke didn’t know what to say to that. He instead ran his fingers through the blond locks, trying to give comfort the only way he knew how.

“Man, you’ve gotten chunky Naruto. Maybe you should pick up your work out routine…or maybe just have more sex. That burns a lot of calories.”

Naruto squeaked, throwing himself onto the bed and pulling the covers over his nude form, trying to cover himself from the new voice. But the new voice wasn’t really new. He recognized it.

“Ero-Sennin!” He yelled. “What the hell are you doing in our room!” Sasuke looked over to the newcomer. He was squatting in the corner of their room, crazy white hair everywhere, a huge scroll on his back, and a notepad in his hand that he was writing on. Sasuke vaguely wondered how long the man had been there observing them walking around naked. Sasuke pulled on some boxers and then grabbed his pants off the floor.

“Hee…hee,” the man said with a perverted grin, “I could ask you two the same thing but I think I can already guess.” He decided against telling them about his research the night before. He had adoring fans waiting for his next book, after all, and he wouldn’t want to displease them by dying by his own student’s hands before it was finished.

“YOU…YOU…” sputtered Naruto, still hiding himself under the covers, “YOU PERVERT! GET OUT!”

Jiraiya giggled some more, eyeing the Uchiha. “I’m not the only pervert here.”

“OUT!” Naruto shouted, throwing a vase that was on the nightstand for decoration at the man.

The white-haired man held his hands out disarmingly after taking the vase to his face. “Now, now, no need for violence. I’m going…”

He jumped out of the window that the two just noticed was opened.

“Awww,” Naruto whined, “Ero-Sennin was perving on us!”

“How do you know?” Sasuke asked. He had never met the guy and didn’t know of his reputation.

“Because he’s ero-sennin!” Naruto yelled, pulling at his yellow hair. “Come this time three months from now and he’ll release a new book with us as the main characters!”

A book? Well, that didn’t sound too bad? “I don’t understand,” Sasuke said quietly, hoping that Naruto would take the hint and realize how loud he was being.

“You don’t understand?” he asked exasperatedly. Then he thought about it. “Of course, you don’t! You don’t know that Jiraiya is the author of all the Icha Icha Paradise books!”

Sasuke could feel himself pale. “He wouldn’t.”

“He does,” Naruto said seriously.

“Get dressed, dobe. We need to find this sensei of yours.” They were going to have a little talk with the perverted man, and if this little talk included cursing, punching, kicking, and the loss of blood of the Sannin, that would be just fine with Sasuke.

They found him outside the women’s bath house, just like Naruto had said earlier when they began their search. He was crouched behind some bushes, peering through a knot hole in the fence. The giggles of women could be heard from the other side and the pervish giggles of an old man could be heard on the closer side.

“Ero-sennin, I can’t believe you peeked on us,” the blond scolded. “Doesn’t that break some personal or professional moral?”

“Shh!” he hushed them, “Go away! There are some particularly beautiful women here today.” He didn’t even spare them a glance.

“Ero-sennin! I swear, if there is one mention of a Narumaru, or a Sasashi, or a Naruka, or even so much as a blue-eyed blond guy, or a black-eyed raven guy, I swear on all of the good flavors of ramen in this world, I will tie you up and let Tsunade castrate you, long and painfully.”

Jiraiya cringed and shifted in order to give his lower regions more protection. What was he going to do about that? Suddenly an idea came to him: agree now, publish later, and forever stay the hell away from Naruto, Tsunade, and Konoha. He should probably stay clear of the Uchiha too. He had a dangerous glint in his cold eyes. If Jiraiya hadn’t seen his performance the night before, he might’ve thought the guy was always such a human popsicle.

“Okay, okay, brat. Stop being so loud. I don’t want them to hear us.”

Sasuke could feel a vein pounding in his forehead. He couldn’t believe that one of the legendary Sannin, the man that had killed Orochimaru, was just some old perverted guy that seemed to give jack-shit about everything that had clothes on. Sasuke could swear his blood pressure was rising just being next to this guy. And Naruto spent three years with him? Unbelievable.

“Oi…what are you still doing here?” Jiraiya asked when they just stood around waiting on him.

“We were sent to find you!” Naruto said, unhappily, “Because you can’t seem to answer a direct summon from the Hokage!”

“Hm…must’ve missed it,” said Jiraiya airily, sweating only a little. Truly, he had ignored it on purpose. He had just come to this town! The women were beautiful and so friendly in all the right ways. He had no desire to leave. “Well, what’s her problem? Does she want me to whip you back into shape? Kami, I’ve never seen you gain weight before, but you’re starting to get chubby, brat.” Naruto turned red in anger.

Sasuke butted in, “Perhaps we can take this somewhere more private.”

“Why?” asked the toad sage, already turning back to his peeping.

“Because, Ero-sennin, Sasuke knocked me up and we need your help!”

Jiraiya had just found the first thing that could peel his interest away from looking at hot, naked, bathing girls. He almost pulled a muscle spinning around so fast.

“WHAT!?”

O0o.o0O

Jiraiya was studying the seal Sasuke had copied from the ground in Suna. They had told him everything Tsunade had told them.

“Okay, I get the purpose of this seal, I understand what it did to you, I know about the YY DNA pattern, but I don’t get why the Kyuubi did this. He has to be trying to gain something and I hardly doubt he just wanted to reproduce.” He sat in thought a little longer. “Hmm…can I look at your seal Naruto?” Naruto pulled off his shirt and focused chakra to his belly. He was proud of the ability. He had slowly been getting his control back together. The morning sickness was easing up too. He seemed to be passing those symptoms in his pregnancy, and he was glad. He just felt so helpless without his chakra, though Tsunade had warned him about using jutsu while pregnant.

The white-haired man hummed and prodded at the seal, and then he sat back down and scratched his chin in thought. “Well, brat, the only thing I can say is that we’re in some deep shit.”

“What do you mean?” Naruto asked. Sasuke was standing behind him in either support or possessiveness -- Naruto couldn’t figure out which.

“Well, just take a look at your seal. What can you tell me about it?”

Naruto looked down at the seal he had memorized very long again, every spiral, every symbol…but something was off. “It looks…faded,” Naruto commented. Sasuke leaned forward to see it. He briefly wondered why he had noticed that in all of their nude adventures together. Then again, he had been a little preoccupied.

Jiraiya nodded. “The fox is transferring his chakra to the soul-less child. That’s the only possible explanation I can come up with. As his chakra transfers, so does the seal. However, with no soul to stop him, he will take over that body and have a body of his own back. If that happens…”

“Damn, we’re in deep-shit,” Naruto agreed with the man’s earlier statement.

“What are our options?” Sasuke asked.

“How the hell should I know?” Jiraiya crudely responded. “I’m not a doctor and I don’t know anything about pregnancy other than to not let it happen. I’d say abort, but I can see you obviously don’t want to do that, and I’m sure the Kyuubi would have devised a defense to that already anyway. The only thing I can think of is an old man named Morio. I think he lives north of here still, right on the boundary Earth Country and Waterfall Country. It’s a good distance to travel. He lives right on the shore. The Yondaime went to him for more seal training than I could give him. If there’s anyone alive that could help, it would be him.”

“Morio, huh? I guess we don’t have any options. We’re going to have to go see him,” Naruto said with a nod. “Are you going to come with us, Ero-Sennin?”

A blush rose on the toad hermit’s face, “Welll…actually…no. You see, Morio had a beautiful daughter, she was taking a bath. One thing led to another and let’s just say I’m not welcome there anymore.” Jiraiya saw Naruto shake his head and roll his eyes. “Besides, with this new…situation, I need to check up on the Akatsuki and see if their aware of it and what they have planned.”

“You better do that, Ero-Sennin! Like I said, if there is a book out in a few months that sounds anything remotely like us,” he pointed to Sasuke and himself, “Then you can kiss your gonads goodbye.” He went off to the bathroom to take a leak, something he had to keep doing more and more often these days. It would probably only get worse as the children grew and pushed on his bladder even more.

Jiraiya was left alone with Sasuke in an uncomfortable silence. “You know, I figured he was gay, but honestly, for you? I don’t see what he sees in a cold person like you.” And then he was gone. Sasuke got the distinct impression that the toad sannin didn’t like him for some reason. Maybe it was because he was the snake’s student. Or maybe it was because of that time he shove a hand through Naruto’s chest. Come to think of it, how did I ever get Naruto after that? He put it to the back of his mind, somewhere near the chicken-ass part of his hairstyle.

O0o.end chapter.o0O

A/N: alright! I’m back and kicking ass and taking numbers!