The Trick Is Not Minding

A/N We're getting close to the end here people, just a few more chapters and maybe an epilogue. That being said, I'm willing to entertain any requests people have for other stories, keep in mind though that I do pain and angst much better than fluff and humor. So, thanks for the reviews and enjoy!!


Chapter Eighteen

When Iruka went back inside a short while later he found the copy-nin slumped over, asleep on the couch. The medic said he needed to rest, he thought, as he scooped the slumbering man up and carried him to the bed. Yet again he was surprised at just how light the lanky figure was. He gently slid the jounin into the bed, then climbed in himself, determined not to waste a moment of this precious time together. This was his chance, probably his last chance, to make things work between them and he was going to give it everything he had.

He pulled the copy-nin into a gentle embrace, carding his fingers through surprisingly soft silver strands, musing idly about what his next step should be. Just how much could he push before he pushed the skittish jounin out of his life completely?

Kakashi was dreaming . . . at least he thought he was dreaming . . . he was almost sure of it. For one thing he was standing in a field of swirling mist, and he was naked. He was pretty sure that meant he was dreaming. Yup, there’s Aoshi, Iruka said he killed him so this must be a dream. “Oh, you finally made it. Late as usual, aren’t you pet.” That all too familiar voice hissed. “But at least you’re here in time for the good part.” At that the copy-nin noticed that there was a figure seated in Aoshi’s lap. “Watch how good it can be when I have someone strong . . . I can’t believe I wasted so much time on a worthless piece of shit like you, this is so much better.” With that he thrust up hard into the man on his lap, causing him to arch and throw his head back in rapture, moaning loudly for more. The jounin’s knees went weak when the revealed face showed the mystery lover to be none other than Iruka . . . his Iruka.

“He loves it you know, loves being fucked hard by a real man.” that wicked whisper continued, as another brutal thrust hit the chuunin’s prostate, causing him to writhe wantonly in the larger man’s arms. “See how much he loves it, I don’t need to hurt him at all. You on the other hand . . . weak and worthless, just like your father.” Just then the writhing teacher reached his peak . . . and the name that fell from his lips wasn’t Kakashi’s.

He woke moments later confused, angry, filled with self loathing and sporting an erection so hard he could pound nails with it. “K’kashi,” a sleepy voice slurred, “what’s wrong, did you have a nightmare?” He pulled the sleepy chuunin more firmly into his embrace and bent his head to whisper huskily in the teacher’s ear.

“Want you ‘ruka, want you so fucking bad. I’ll make it good, I promise. I can make it as good as it always should have been. Just please, don’t turn me away.”

A soft kiss was placed on his temple and a soothing voice responded “‘kashi, beloved, it’s you and me . . . it’s always good, always . . . I want you too, I would never turn you away.”

As soon as the words had left his mouth Iruka was flipped onto his stomach, and large calloused hands began to trace the muscled planes of his back. The copy-nin pulled down his mask and began licking and nipping a slow lazy trail down the chuunin’s spine, laying tender kisses across the saddle of his hips before proceeding to lap and nuzzle pert caramel buttocks. Kakashi spread the firm globes and dipped his head to place a kiss on the tender pink pucker revealed to his hungry gaze. He lapped at the ring of muscle, reveling in the wanton moan pulled from the teacher’s lips. His tongue swirled and then dipped inside, retreating to thrust deeper, stroking hot velvet walls, dragging forth the most wonderful sounds and spurring the jounin on.

Fingers came into play alongside that wicked tongue and the chuunin was spread wide and plundered, arching and groaning as his prostate was stroked. Finally the jounin could take no more. Iruka groaned in disappointment when the fingers were removed and received a sharp bite on his right cheek in response before the copy-nin lifted his head and whispered huskily in the teacher’s ear, “So fucking wonderful.” as his pale length slowly and inexorably sank into the hungry pink pucker to the hilt. Kakashi gripped bronze hips hard as he immediately began a slow, measured slide, in and out, occasionally adding a hard thrust that had Iruka seeing stars.

The academy teacher was fighting not to come. The things that man was doing with his tongue were absolutely sinful. His tongue, the realization slowly formed, holy shit, his mask is off, and with that knowledge his cock hardened impossibly, dripping precum and throbbing in time with his thundering pulse. Then the fingers joined the fray and Iruka was lost. He fought to stave off his orgasm, thinking of every turn-off he could, as he moaned and writhed like a cat in heat. When the fingers had disappeared he groaned in relief, finally able to gain some control. That control was immediately wrenched away at the electric pain of a bite to his ass, and the wave of hot lust triggered by the jounin’s huskily whispered words. When the copy-nin’s hard length filled him completely he was lost.

Kakashi increased the pace, keeping the teacher’s hips in a bruising iron grip, pulling him back until he was almost sitting in the taller man’s lap, penetrating even further, striking the chuunin’s prostate head-on with every thrust. Iruka howled when a long fingered hand wrapped around his dripping erection and began to stroke him firmly in time with his thrusts, occasionally adding a twist, until with a thrust and the firm stroke of a calloused thumb across his slit he came, screaming the jounin’s name and coating his chest with bursts of creamy seed.

The tightening of Iruka’s passage was too much for the jounin to handle, and with one last mighty thrust he felt the world grow white and dim as he shot burst after burst of creamy seed deep inside his chuunin. His mouth was filled with the taste of copper, and he realized as he came back to himself that he’d bitten the teacher at the juncture of neck and shoulder when he’d reached orgasm.

Watching the blood slowly trickle from the bite mark, so close to the throat of the trembling figure, Kakashi suddenly began to reevaluate what he’d just done. Oh shit, I still hurt him, even when I tried my hardest not to, he thought, then his eyes dropped to the bruises standing out starkly in the shape of his hands on bronze hips and the bleeding bite on his ass, and he was sure that he had irrevocably blown his last chance to get it right. With a stifled gasp he pulled away, causing his limp member to slide out of the chuunin, making him whimper at the loss.

That whimper was the straw that broke the back of the copy-nin’s composure. He pulled his mask up and backed away, falling to the floor with a heavy thump when his legs wouldn’t hold. He crumbled under the onslaught of emotion, covering his face with his hands and whispering strangled apologies to the man still struggling to recover from the most intense orgasm of his life.

Broken whispers caught the teacher’s ear, tempting him back towards consciousness. “Mmm ‘kashi.” he managed to mumble as he groped awkwardly behind his back for the jounin. The lack of a warm spent body behind him and the pained sounds from across the room finally coalesced in Iruka’s brain, and he rose weakly and turned his head, searching for his now absent lover.

The chuunin leapt to his feet at the sight that met his bleary eyes. The copy-nin was curled up in an incredibly tight ball, hands over his face, weeping uncontrollably. An occasional strangled ‘sorry’ torn out between heart wrenching sobs. He forced his feet to carry him across the room and dropped down beside the distraught figure. “‘kashi, love, what’s wrong? Why are you sorry? That was the most . . .” here he stopped, at a loss to describe something that was so much more than he had ever imagined, “I saw god.” he finally simply stated, “nothing in my life could possibly compare . . . it was wonderful, you were wonderful.” he continued to gently stroke the broad trembling back, “Please talk to me, don’t shut me out, please.”

The sobs quieted to rough gasps and choked sniffles and a very small, very defeated voice finally replied “I hurt you, I tried so hard and I still hurt you . . . I’m no good, tainted, worthless, weak, useless, unwanted . . . unlovable. You trusted me and I . . .” he broke off with a gasp and couldn’t go on, too lost in self-loathing to see the gentle understanding in wide chocolate eyes.

“Oh ‘kashi,” the chuunin said in his gentlest voice, “you didn’t hurt me, and I do want you. I think I have an idea what our problem may be. You think you’re hurting me when you’re not. I think it’s because you don’t know how good it can feel . . . and I have an idea about how to change that, if you trust me . . . do you trust me ‘kashi?” The jounin weakly nodded his head, he didn’t even have to think about it, the teacher had done nothing but give and give, of course he trusted him. “Good.” Iruka whispered, “That’s very good. Now, I don’t know about you, but I can barely stand upright, I need sleep. Let’s go to bed and sleep snuggled up together warm and safe, and when we wake up I’ll start showing you how good it feels.” With that he pulled the copy-nin to his feet and the pair staggered back to the bed, gravitating into each other’s arms and falling instantly to sleep, physically and emotionally exhausted.