Sacred Flower

Okay, the second last chapter!!! I also have great news on my crappy life…I have a job! My job has a few perks…I get free donuts!!! YES!! No more asking daddy for money…I got my own cash!! SHOPPING SPREE!! (Yeah, looking for a job was why I haven’t updated in awhile…^^;)

Enough of my crap, on to the story!

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-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:- Month One -:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-

For her first month of pregnancy, Sakura still had a slender form. No one knew she was pregnant (other than Sasuke or Tsunade) until she told a few people.

Sakura quietly told Naruto and Hinata over lunch. Hinata gasped and hugged her friend, congratulating her on their expecting child. Naruto sulked a little bit.

“One bastard is enough, now we’ll have two!” Sakura smacked him in the head.

“Don’t call our baby a bastard!” reprimanded Sakura.

“Besides,” piped in Sasuke, “what’s it going to be called if it’s a girl?”

“A-” started Naruto. He was about to finish his sentence when he noticed Sakura’s death glares and he shut up. If looks could kill, Sakura would have killed him a million times over already. Instead, Naruto slapped on his grin and patted Sasuke on the back.

“You must have been real horny to knock her up! Congrats bastard!” he boisterously said. Sasuke smirked with pride and Sakura smacked Naruto in the head again.

“Naruto, don’t blab it to the village, you’re one of the first people we’ve told. So far, it’s just you guys and Tsunade.”

“Sure!” he replied, “I’ll keep it a secret! Believe it!” His loud voice was enough to alert the entire village. He was practically announcing it to the world that Sakura was pregnant.

When everyone went their separate ways, Sakura was muttering under her breath. “I bet that stupid Naruto told the entire village already…” Sasuke lead her back home to rest.

“Don’t worry, I’m sure he didn’t tell anybody. Now, just sleep. I’ll be doing a few D-class missions and I’ll be out for the rest of the afternoon, but I won’t be gone long. Just sleep.” Sakura fell asleep on the couch with a pillow under her and a blanket covering her because Sasuke’s deep, smooth voice coaxed her to sleep and she dreamt of cradling her child in her arms.

She awoke the next morning when Ino burst in to congratulate her on the baby. Sakura put on a happy face and answered any and all questions, even agreeing to go baby shopping with Ino sometime. Unconsciously, her hand gripped the blankets.

‘Naruto is so dead.’

-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:- Month Two -:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-

Every night, Sasuke and Sakura would sleep next to each other with Sasuke’s arm wrapped around her waist as a protective means for her and their baby. After a little while, Sakura would wake up earlier than Sasuke and stumble out of bed. Sasuke, being the protective man he is, was always awake at the slightest stirring Sakura made.

He would pretend to be asleep when she was awake and she’d always look at him to see if he really was asleep. After being satisfied that she hadn’t disturbed him, she would get up and go to the bathroom and…vomit.

Sasuke internally winced at the sound. First, Sakura would sound like she’s choking on something and then the sound of liquid hitting liquid. Then Sakura would wash her face and step out of the bathroom to make some tea to drink, finding Sasuke already sipping some tea. He handed her a cup he already poured for her while she was emptying her stomach and she’d smile, apologizing for waking him and always accepting it, not telling her that he was up as soon as she was.

The first time this happened, he got up and hugged her, saying that he would always be there for her every step of the way while he was making his way to her, but when he wrapped his arms around her, his chest barely touching hers, she’d scream in agony. He jumped back and checked her over.

“What happened?” he frantically asked.

“My breasts,” she replied breathlessly. Apparently, the pain was so intense that it practically knocked the wind out of her. He barely touched it and she felt extreme pain.

‘Do not touch the breasts; they are extremely sore and tender,’ he noted. A small part of him groaned.

‘Can we at least touch the other parts of her?’ his inner mind yelled out. Sasuke shook his head to dispel the thoughts and apologized for hurting her. He turned back around to the stove and made her something to eat, particularly something with lots of protein. Something told him that she’ll be needing it.

Sakura still worked at the hospital but Tsunade forbade her on working with the patients who needed internal repair. Tsunade figured that the occasional wave of nausea could wash over her while doing these jobs and make her lose concentration, possibly hurting the patient in the process. All Sakura could do was do physical examinations and do paperwork for Tsunade. Anything that didn’t involve chakra.

She also gave Sakura frequent breaks, as frequent as a 30 minute break for 15 minutes of work. Sakura tried to convince her otherwise but Sakura had to admit, she needed those breaks. During a few of those breaks, Sakura could be found scarfing down the beef Sasuke had bought her to eat for those breaks. Damn, that woman needed her meat.

Every now and then, Sakura would have a slight mood swing. She had a slight bump on her abdomen and she’d rub it affectionately. She had a few conversations with Sasuke a few times about their child.

“Sasuke, would you prefer a boy or girl?” she asked out of the blue. At the time, she had a sleepy smile on her face, obviously thinking about their baby.

“I don’t know,” he stated.

“How could you not have a preference!?” she blurted out. It was obvious that she was annoyed now. She began to rant about how everyone had a preference and if he chose one, she’d tell him the pros and cons about that gender. At least she wasn’t smiling one minute and crying the next.

At night, Sasuke would always hold her while she rested, either watching TV or reading a book. Every now and then, he’d rub her slightly swollen belly as if to tell the unborn infant that their daddy was always not too far. Sakura would look at him and smile.

Sometimes, she’d fall asleep in his lap and grind herself into his groin. This made Sasuke a little frustrated. He’d reach out to gently caress her breasts, gently because they were still tender. He barely touched them when she’d wake up and slap his hand away. That was when she declared that she doesn’t want to be touched, from now until the birth of their child.

Sasuke sighed. This was going to be a long pregnancy.

-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:- Month Three -:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-

Ever since Tsunade figured out that Sakura was pregnant, she has been checking up on Sakura every week. Right before Sakura was going on her shifts at the hospital, Tsunade would call her in and check things out. Sakura’s pregnancy was coming along just fine, as any other woman. Satisfied, Tsunade sent Sakura back to work.

Sakura had gained a little more weight during this month and her belly had swollen up a little more. Now, she actually looked a little pregnant and Naruto had commented on it, saying that she looked like she got fatter which earned him a beating from Sakura.

Sakura seemed a little more energetic now than she did last month, although she can still tire easily. She doesn’t need as many breaks as she did before and she wasn’t snapping at anybody as much. Shizune was the most relieved; she was scared shitless when Sakura would yell. Even Kakashi was no match for Sakura’s monstrous strength.

This was the month that Sakura began her food cravings. She would always ask for the strangest combinations of food (i.e.: blueberries mixed in her ramen, raw fish in her salads, potato chips to dunk in her tea). Sometimes, she would crave for foods that weren’t even grown or sold in Konoha and if she couldn’t get any, she threw a temper tantrum like a 5 year old girl.

She was left in Naruto’s and Hinata’s care (even though Sasuke was reluctant to hand her over to the blonde loser, Hinata assured him that Sakura would be fine) while Sasuke left on a mission that would take a little over three days. It was just an escort mission to a small village south of Konoha.

During his absence, Sakura asked for Yuki Tenpura, a rare delicacy known only to Snow Country. When Naruto laughed at her for her difficult request, Sakura screamed like crazy. Hinata persuaded Naruto to go get whatever Sakura asked for while she would calm her down. Naruto was defiant right until the very end, until Sakura threatened to rip off his manhood with her chakra. Naruto immediately summoned Gamabunta and used his quick speed to retrieve the food and come back before Sasuke got home. Sakura happily thanked Naruto and gobbled it down.

Sasuke has noticed that Sakura’s morning sickness is slowly decreasing. Slowly, but surely. She isn’t throwing up as much as she used to, so he figured that it was a good sign.

But then again, whatever good that happens, there’s always a downside. Sakura hasn’t been throwing up as much but she sure needed to use the bathroom a little more. At first, it was once every 12 hours or so, and then it slowly decreased. Once every 12 hours to 11 hours, to 9 and ½…she needed to go!

When he was a child, he saw a few other pregnant women. One was very pregnant and she needed to go every five minutes. At a very young age, he learned to get the hell out of the way when a pregnant woman needed the bathroom.

Sasuke also felt very frustrated. When he was sure Sakura was in a deep sleep, he would get up in the middle of the night and make his way to the bathroom. Keeping his mouth clamped shut, he jerked himself off. It was the only action he’s gotten since she cut him off and he can see why; they both thought that sex would hurt the baby.

Every night, he would have dreams about having Sakura over and over again. He missed how her body made him feel. His mind could barely accept the sentence given to them.

‘Just a few more months, just a few more months…’

-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:- Month Four -:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-

Sakura’s stomach has definitely swollen up now. She could barely see past her swollen belly. If she stood up straight, she could still see her legs but the most she’d see is the mid-thigh and down. She has definitely gained more weight too. All that meat she’d been gobbling down last month and the month before were catching up to her.

Tsunade wanted to relieve Sakura of work but Sakura persuaded her to let her stay for one more month. It wasn’t like she was going to pop the baby out anytime soon. Tsunade was reluctant but Sakura was insistent. Sakura would continue to work in the hospital until she was well into her fifth month.

During one of Tsunade’s little checkups, she noted that Sakura’s nipple colour has darkened a little bit and she had blotchy skin on her face. Sakura freaked out, screaming that the baby was not only eating her body fat, but also eating her beauty. Tsunade laughed and said that it was normal. She gave Sakura a few vitamin pills that would help for her pregnancy.

“When you feel tired, stop whatever you’re doing and take a breather,” advised Tsunade. “It’ll be healthier for you and the baby.”

When Sakura got home from work, Sasuke was already there making dinner.

“Sasuke, do you still think I’m beautiful?” she asked.

“Of course,” he answered without looking at her.

“Why aren’t you looking at me when you answer!?” she cried. “It’s because of my blotchy skin, isn’t it!?” Sakura cried and Sasuke tried to calm her down as much as possible. Sakura pried herself away from his hold and locked herself in the bathroom, crying hysterically. Sasuke had to make millions of mental notes on what to do when Sakura wanted more than she let on.

Every now and then, Sakura felt a little funny. It was like she had gas but when she tried to let it out, there was nothing. She simply dismissed it has a slight trouble with digestion. She has heard from other women that they would get a little indigestion or heartburn.

-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:- Month Five -:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-

This is the month when Ino had to drag Sakura out of the house.

“Argh! Ino! If you want to go baby shopping, you get pregnant!” Sakura screamed.

“But we have to get you some proper clothes!” she argued.

Ino had a good point; Sakura needed proper maternity clothes. She’s not fitting into her clothes properly now so she borrowed some of Sasuke’s loose pants and shorts. At night, she’d just wear one of Sasuke’s huge shirts with nothing but her panties underneath. Sakura didn’t even go out anymore; she spent her time at home eating and taking a piss every once in a while because nothing but Sasuke’s stuff fit on her.

She shouldn’t decline the offer anyway; Tsunade had relieved her of work since the second week of the fifth month. She had all this spare time on her hands and she didn’t know how to spend it. Sasuke wouldn’t be away for very long, completing simple missions as he does.

“Hmm…Fine Ino, I’ll go shopping,” she sighed, giving into the blonde’s shopping madness. Ino made a shrill squealing sound and pulled Sakura out the door.

Walking around, Sakura saw very cute things for an expecting mother. They went window shopping, and Sakura had to admit, some of them would look nice on her. Ino had the same thought because she pulled Sakura into a store. Ino held up a pair of while overalls while matching it up with a loose-fitting pink shirt.

“What about these Sakura? These would be good from now until the end of your seventh month.”

Sakura took a look at what Ino was talking about. They would be good until then. For now, it would look a little saggy around her waistline but as soon as she grew into it, it would be a perfect fit.

As soon as Sakura got home, she plopped onto the couch, dropping the bags at the door. Now, she had proper sleeping clothes and proper casual clothes for an expecting mother. She felt a lot more confident now that she didn’t need to throw up every five seconds; instead, she had a little heartburn and indigestion.

At night, she would read a book while Sasuke would come out of the bathroom, smelling wonderfully fresh from a shower.

“Ooh,” she said, cradling her stomach. Sasuke looked at her questioningly. Sakura shook her head, indicating that nothing was wrong…until she felt it again.

“Sakura, is something wrong?”

“No, it’s nothing…” Climbing into bed with her, turned out the lights and kissed her goodnight. Before he went off into slumber, Sakura grabbed his hand and placed it on her lower abdomen.

“Feel,” she said. It took a full 4 minutes until Sasuke could feel what she was talking about. The baby kicked! It was soft, but it was there.

“Wow,” he murmured under his breath. Sasuke moved his hand to a different spot on Sakura’s stomach and the baby kicked that exact spot. It felt like the tiny little thing was trying to connect with its father.

“Daddy’s never far away…” he whispered under his breath to the baby. Sakura smiled and slapped his hand away.

“It’s time for us to sleep now, Daddy.”

-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:- Month Six -:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-

This was the month Sasuke had been waiting for: Sakura wanted sex! He was scared to hurt the baby so he wouldn’t penetrate her with his manhood, no matter how much she begged in that needy and urgent tone.

He would touch her and taste her, but he’d never enter her. The closest he got to penetrating her was slowly slipping a finger inside of her wet folds. She would squirm under his touch.

“Sasuke, I need you,” she rasped breathlessly. Her back arched as far as it would go which wasn’t as much as it could before she was pregnant.

“I can’t. The baby,” he reminded her. She was pissed off now.

“Why not? I heard that it won’t hurt the baby,” she whined.

“But we don’t know that for sure,” he replied. She would moan and writhe from his touches but it never seemed to be enough for her. Smirking, Sasuke bent down and suckled on her bud which had hardened into a little pink pearl. A silent cry was heard and her juices seeped through her opening. Sakura passed out shortly after that.

Sasuke had gotten used to this routine. Touch Sakura, taste Sakura, wait for her to pass out and jerk himself off in the bathroom. He had been doing that last part since she cut him off all those months ago but he never got to touch her or taste her. All he had were thoughts of what he’d do to her once her bulging belly disappeared and they were definitely not pure thoughts.

After he finished relieving himself, his thoughts strayed to Tsunade’s words.

“Sakura’s doing quite well, I believe she’ll have a healthy baby.” Sakura was overjoyed by that comment and Tsunade made motions for them to leave. However, when Sasuke got up to help Sakura, she told Sasuke to stay back for a few more minutes. It appeared that Sasuke had ignored her, leaving the room with Sakura, but he came back shortly after. He was just helping Sakura get to the waiting room.

“Uchiha, you better take good care of her.” Sasuke gave her an arrogant, but reassuring, smirk.

Sakura has gone out more thanks to Ino. If it weren’t for her, Sakura would be at home, wearing nothing but Sasuke’s shirts and a pair of panties. Sakura had clothes that fit (if not too big), and she wasn’t embarrassed about her oversized belly. Naruto kept joking about it though.

“You look like you swallowed a whole watermelon!” he shouted. Sasuke would have killed him had he not gone on another escort mission that would take a week, more or less. It’s at the one week point now and Sasuke has yet to be seen…

“Naruto, don’t say that. Sakura looks beautiful, and she isn’t that big,” rebuked Hinata.

“I bet Sakura would look even more beautiful if that was my baby!” Naruto claimed boisterously. Hinata looked somewhat hurt but she masked it over quickly.

“Is that so?” spoke a voice. Naruto froze in his spot. He knew that voice all too well. Naruto slowly turned around to see Sasuke holding Sakura in his arms, his free hand rubbing her swollen abdomen absentmindedly, a glare upon both of their faces. Naruto knew that he’d be dead if he didn’t run now but their combined glares kept him in his spot.

“Are you saying that I look ugly!?” Sakura growled.

“How dare you insult my unborn child and Sakura!” Sasuke yelled.

“You shouldn’t say things like that in front of Hinata!” Sakura admonished.

“You shouldn’t say them at all!” Sasuke scolded. Naruto gulped. Hinata blushed. Sasuke and Sakura continued to glare at Naruto, so much that it would have killed him a million times over already.

“Hey, do you hear that?” asked Naruto. “I think Granny-Hokage’s calling for me!” Naruto sped off, trying to save his sorry ass. Sasuke shook his head and led Sakura home while Hinata chased after Naruto.

Over the next little while, everything was normal. Sakura went to see Tsunade for her weekly check ups and she was still fine, if not perfectly normal. Ino would come over a lot or drag Sakura out of the house, and when she did, her hands seemed to be glued to Sakura’s belly.

“Damn it, why can’t your baby kick!?” Ino growled impatiently.

“It’ll kick when it wants to kick!” Sakura yelled in response.

Sometimes, Kakashi would come to check on Sakura over at Sasuke’s apartment and pat her on the head, and then her stomach, eliciting an annoyed response.

“Kakashi, I’m not a child anymore.”

“No, but that scrunched-up face of yours could be mistaken for one,” Kakashi said with his usual mirth. Had Kakashi known how frequent mood swings happen with a highly hormonal pregnant woman in her sixth month, he would have shut the hell up.

In the kitchen, Sasuke was making something for Sakura to eat. He would be in there several times a day, thanks to Sakura’s increased appetite. He could hear every single word they were saying, and he had to agree with Kakashi; her face did look like a child’s face when she was annoyed.

A clatter in the same room as Sakura made Sasuke drop everything and run to her.

What he saw wasn’t some enemy ninja attacking his lover and unborn child, but…Sakura was trying to kill Kakashi? Sakura picked up a lamp and hurled it at Kakashi. He dodged it in time to hit the wall behind him.

“Sakura? What are you doing?”

Sakura spun around on her heel, and she had tears in her eyes; a slight contrast to her angry face moments ago.

“Sasuke…he called me a child!” Sakura tried to run to Sasuke but she ended up looking like she was half waddling and half running. Kakashi was suddenly reminded of a toy he wanted as a child that he saw in Bear Country. He whispered the catchphrase of said toy under his breath while still watching Sakura.

“Weebles wobble but they don’t fall down…” Sakura snapped her weepy eyes open and pried her cheek off of Sasuke’s shoulder.

“What are you calling me? A weeble? What the hell is that!?” Sakura struggled to get out of Sasuke’s grasp but he kept her firmly in place.

“Sakura, just ignore him. He doesn’t mean anything.” Pressing his forehead against hers, he mumbled sweet nothings to her and made her forget everything Kakashi said. Sasuke then hugged her close to him and gently swayed to imaginary music while motioning Kakashi to quietly slip out the door.

Kakashi was thankful; he could never face off against a hormonal, pregnant Sakura with inhuman strength.

-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:- Month Seven -:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-

This month, Sakura really drove Sasuke mad.

Sakura began to hum little tunes which would irritate the hell out of Sasuke. She read in a medical text that babies would have use of their senses, including the sense of hearing. Sakura would buy little children’s books and read them aloud in hopes of the baby being comforted by her voice. Yes, Sakura did have a sweet voice, but when she screamed (in pleasure or otherwise), you would never believe it was still little Sakura.

Ino still came over, almost on a daily basis. If that girl ever had anything in her hands, she would drop it the second Sakura opened the door and her hands would suddenly be glued to Sakura’s belly. There were few incidents where Sasuke would open the door and Ino fell into routine, dropping her belongings and attaching her hand to Sasuke’s belly, and each time, Sakura believed him to be two-timing her.

When he and Sakura were alone, he would place his hand gently to cover her womb. He could feel the sharp kicks the baby made.

“Sasuke…” Sakura whispered. “That’s our baby. Our baby is doing that!”

“I know,” he said, still amazed at the movement. Judging by the kicks, this baby would be strong enough to overthrow their old man one day. He rubbed her belly soothingly…until Sakura jumped up from the couch and ran like mad to the bathroom.

Sasuke sighed. She needed to go every few seconds at this point, and when she came back, she felt the need to go again. Sakura seemed to spend a lot of her time in the bathroom, which rarely left time for them to talk or anything. He wanted to make preparations for the baby (which they’ve started) but Sakura spent more time looking for the nearest bathroom rather than looking for the perfect crib, or the perfect toy or anything.

This month, Sakura cut him off again. The cold showers seemed to be his best friend nowadays, especially when he needed her but she denied him. He had tried to jerk himself off, but he had grown accustomed to his own touches and he no longer found his release, so now, he was either going to calm himself down with an icy-cold shower or die of blue balls.

When Naruto and Kakashi came over, Sasuke would greet him at the door in a cheery tone, which totally sounded foreign to everyone other than Sakura. Right after he let them in, Sasuke whispered a threat to Naruto.

“Keep your mouth shut…don’t say anything that’ll upset her or you’ll die, and not by my hands. Got it?”

“Y-yeah,” Naruto gulped. Kakashi still held a bored look and tried to keep it in mind. Naruto tried to keep his promise but knowing him, he’ll end up saying/doing something stupid anyways.

“Sakura! You look great!” Naruto commented. He said it while staring at her obviously enlarged breasts. Sakura noticed it and proceeded to hit him by throwing a vase across the room.

“Naruto, you look at me in the face when you speak to me!” she growled, throwing a book at him. Naruto dodged every attack while Sasuke and Kakashi shook their heads.

Sometimes, Ino would come over when Naruto and Kakashi were there, unknowingly saving their asses. Sakura’s face lit up and Ino would push her to go out shopping for more maternity clothes, especially that it’s nearing the end-of-the-month mark and her clothes were getting too small now.

Sakura would go out and leave the boys alone to talk. Usually, they talked about Sakura and/or pregnant women.

“So Sasuke,” Naruto began, “how’s life with Sakura?”

“Horrible,” the man in question replied. “She won’t let me touch her, she eats like a pig, she needs to take a piss every second and everything I do seems to make her cry and/or piss her off.”

Kakashi chuckled. “This is how women usually are. Did she, by any chance, ask if you still thought she was beautiful? If so, elaborate on your answer.”

“She did ask me, and I said of course, but I wasn’t looking at her. She was uncontrollably upset and she probably thought that I was lying because I didn’t look at her while answering. When I tried to calm her down by holding her, she pulled away from me and locked herself in the bathroom.”

Naruto burst out laughing. “See, you don’t understand Sakura’s feelings as well as I do. You shouldn’t be with her, not when you treat her poorly.” As soon as Naruto finished that sentence, Sasuke pounced on him and tore him apart piece by piece. Kakashi sighed and pulled the two apart.

“Stop it, you two. I think Sakura would like a home to come back to when she’s done shopping.”

Sasuke growled at Naruto. “If you understand her so well, how come she chose me over you?”

Naruto stayed silent. “Oh shut up!” Sasuke smirked with satisfaction. When Sakura came home, she was none the wiser about the chaos that had ensued.

-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:- Month Eight -:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-

Sakura started to have serious back pains now. She went to Tsunade about them and she said it was normal in women. The extra weight in the front meant that the back was doing more work to keep the girl upright.

“If you can’t sleep, try using extra pillows,” advised Tsunade.

Sasuke spent most of his time at home now, hands glued to Sakura’s belly. The baby already seemed to be taking after Sasuke, stubbornly kicking away and feisty attitude. Most of the time, Sasuke didn’t get to feel the baby’s kicks; Sakura was conveniently in the bathroom when they happened. He began to suspect that she wanted to keep the baby’s kicks all to herself for her to feel.

Sakura would do normal everyday things and then she’d double over in slight pain, clutching her oversized stomach.

“Is something wrong? Is the baby coming?” he asked worriedly.

“No,” she replied, “I’ve heard of this. It’s like my body’s getting me ready for the real thing, you know? Besides, it’s way too early for the baby to come.” Sakura gave him a reassuring smile, but Sasuke took her to Tsunade anyway to confirm it. Tsunade did confirm it however; Braxton Hicks is what it’s called.

“It’s common in all women during this month,” explained Tsunade. “It may feel like the real thing but instead of pain in the front, it would hurt a little in the back and radiate to the front. It’s nothing to worry over, but you shouldn’t upset her dramatically. Otherwise, she‘ll go into labor early.” Nodding, Sasuke took Sakura home by walking her through the village, slowly and steadily.

“Geez Sasuke, it’s not like I’m a China plate or something. Ah!” she cried, doubling over again. She clutched her stomach. “The baby…it’s coming!” Sasuke looked at her with wide, shocked eyes. It was too early!

“Psyche!” Sakura yelled and burst into hysterical laughter. Oh great, just what Sasuke needed: a hormonal, pregnant woman who was also a comedian.

Sakura was restricted to the bed and the couch for the rest of the month, getting up only to rush to the bathroom. She spent so much time there, Sasuke contemplated on giving Sakura her meals and getting a bunch of pillows and blankets for a makeshift bed in the bathroom. That way, she won’t be far from the toilet in case she needed to go.

Sakura looked at herself in the bathroom. Her breasts had gotten larger and her belly was swollen. She felt fat. She went to Sasuke and asked for his opinion.

“Sasuke, am I getting fat?”

“Of course not,” he said, looking at her this time, “you’re not fat, just pregnant.”

“But look at me! Look at all these stretch marks!” she whined, pointing at said marks. Sasuke got up and wrapped his arms around her, holding the small of her back and kissing her forehead.

“Sakura, you’re beautiful. You’re the most beautiful woman I’ve ever met, pregnant or not.”

‘Now let’s just pray that I haven’t pissed you off…’

Smiling, Sakura snuggled into him. “Thank you,” she whispered.

Sitting down on the couch, Sasuke flipped on the TV while Sakura fell asleep in his arms. He rubbed her stomach idly and thought for a while.

‘I’m going to be a father soon…and I won’t let you down kid.’

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Holy crap, I’ve turned Sasuke into a little sweetie! He was way sexier being a badass!

About the Weebles, it was an actual toy I think. That was definitely a catchphrase, used by Michael Rappaport in his sitcom The War at Home. I had to add that in there, it was so funny!