I'd Know You Anywhere

Okay ya'll here's chapter two. Now I'm gonna italicize the name Sasuke uses in his female form when it describes her doing something or having something done to her. Naruto meets FemSasuke in this chapter as does Anko, Tsunade, Sakura, and Ino. I had a lot of fun with this chapter and I hope you enjoy reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it.

'thoughts'
emphasis

Chapter 2 A New Kunoichi

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Sasuke entered the market street and was almost to the produce stand when he felt a hand on his ass. Little hint, never invade Sasuke's personal space. He grabbed the offending hand twisted it behind the groper's back, pressed a kunai against the offender's throat, and hissed in the man's ear, "Keep your hands to yourself unless you want them cut off and shoved somewhere very uncomfortable."

The man gulped and stuttered out an agreement. Sasuke flung the cretin away and turned to go back to what he was doing when he heard the man say, "Crazy bitch."

The Uchiha turned back intending to show the guy what crazy was when he saw that someone was already doing it for him, Konoha's official psycho kunoichi, Mitarashi Anko.

Anko's boot was on the assholes throat and her kunai was pressed between his legs. Sasuke couldn't help but grimace in sympathy despite the fact that the guy needed an ass kicking. The raven watched Anko as she grinned creepily and said, "Now then it appears that you need to learn some manners. You don't just go grabbing a girls ass and expect to get away with it, especially in a village full of kunoichi, that's a good way to lose precious parts," she pressed the kunai a bit closer, "So you can either apologize to the young lady you just insulted or I can turn you into a gelding. Are we clear?"

The man paled, looked over towards Sasuke, and said, "I-I'm s-sorry miss. I-it won't h-happen again."

Sasuke decided to play along, "See that it doesn't or I'll get to you before Mitarashi-san and do worse than just castrate you."

The man nodded and ran away like a bat out of hell when Anko released him. The purple haired woman laughed and faced Sasuke, "Well that was fun. You know you're the first kunoichi other than me who's ever pulled a kunai on idiots like that. Most just slug the perverts."

Sasuke raised an eyebrow, "Painful but not very effective in preventing such idiots from grabbing."

"Yup threats work so much better. So kiddo, I've never seen you around here before you a new transfer?"

"In a manner of speaking."

Anko laughed at the short answer, "I like you kid, what's your name?"

Sasuke mentally kicked herself. 'Oh shit I didn't think of a name for my disguise!' But the raven recovered fast and gave the first name that came to mind, "Usagi Sachiko."

Anko snickered, "Your mom must have a great sense of humor."

Sachiko looked off to the side and said quietly, "Yes she did."

Anko winced at the tone and the use of past tense and did what she always did when she hit on a sensitive subject, loudly changed the subject to food, "Hey I was heading to the dango shop, why don't you join me?"

"Actually I-"

Anko grabbed her arm and began dragging the raven over to the dango shop, "It'll be my treat. Besides I'll get to pester you some more. That's a great dress by the way, reminds me of my favorite loudmouth's eyes."

Sachiko was at a complete loss at what to do so she decided to just sit with Anko and let the woman talk. After a bit, Anko paused in her chatter and asked a question, "Where did you get that dress anyway? Not many would carry dresses in that color."

Sachiko raised an eyebrow, "Why not?"

"Hmm most places around here equate that color with a particular shinobi and very very few like him."

Sachiko frowned, "What could he have done for anyone to dislike him so?"

"Nothing, that's the problem. He's hated by a lot of people for something out of his control."

Sachiko, knowing who Anko was talking about and why he was hated, had to clench her hand under the table to keep from reacting too fiercely to hearing that people still treated Naruto like sludge. She took a deep breath, "That's horrible, he must be very angry about being treated so badly."

Anko grabbed a stick of dango and bit in rabidly, "Mmph actually he's not. He's determined to protect their ignorant asses and just takes the insults with a smile. He never shows anyone that it hurts and I know it hurts like hell."

"He must be very strong."

"He is. At the top of my list of the five strongest shinobi alive."

Sachiko couldn't help it, her curiosity got the better of her and she asked, "Who are the other five?"

Anko looked around and leaned closer to the raven conspiratorially, "Well Sachiko-chan, don't let this get back to anyone because I do not need any of the others on the list getting a big head, okay?"

Sachiko's interest rose and she nodded. Anko smirked, "Alright now this list isn't just based on their strength as a ninja but also their inner strength. Number one I've told you about, his name is Uzumaki Naruto and a more compassionate, loving person you'll never find on this earth. Number two is Naruto's best friend, Uchiha Sasuke. In his day to day life, Sasuke is a cold, arrogant, emo bastard but that's how he keeps people from getting close. He lost his entire family at the hands of his brother and spent years seeking revenge but a couple years ago he risked his own neck to save Naruto's life and gave up his avenger life-style. That speaks of strength to me."

Sachiko blinked in surprise, she'd been certain her male self wouldn't have a prayer of ending up on Anko's list. Now she was really curious, "Who else?"

"Three is Hatake Kakashi. Perpetually late, porn reading, irritating asshole though he is, he rose up from his father's legacy of shame and suicide, the loss of his entire team one by one, and his student's betrayal to continue on as a loyal Konoha shinobi."

Sachiko nodded and Anko moved on.

"Four is Umino Iruka. He ties with Naruto on loving, compassionate person. He's just a chunin in rank but he's taken on S-class criminals, mutant freaks, and traitorous Konoha shinobi to protect his students, his loved ones, and Konoha as a whole at the risk of his life. He lost his family as a child but considers the guy most hold responsible, who isn't by the way, as his son."

Sachiko smiled at the picture Anko painted of Iruka, "Who's the fifth?"

"That would be Sabaku no Garra, the Kazekage. He overcame a childhood of hatred, assignation attempts ordered by his father, betrayal, and loneliness to become a man who would give his life for his village."

Anko leaned back and smiled contentedly, "There they are. Course I just gave you the bare bones of why they're strong in my opinion. The last four all have something in common too."

"What's that?"

"Each and every one of them would give their lives for Naruto. I'm very fond of that loudmouth."

"Obviously."

Anko chuckled, "If you'd ever met him you'd know why I'm so fond of Naruto," she broke off to eye Sachiko and suddenly a sly smirk crept across her face that had the raven edging back in caution.

"Mitarashi-san?"

The snake mistress grabbed Sachiko's arm and dragged her out of the shop, "C'mon you've gotta meet him."

"H-hey! I have errands to run!"

"Aw they can wait. Believe me meeting Naruto's worth it."

Sachiko tried unsuccessfully to pry her arm out of Anko's grip, eventually giving it up as futile and hoping to high heaven that Naruto wouldn't recognize her as Sasuke in disguise.

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Naruto looked up from the chakra shield he was trying to create at the familiar voice calling his name. He grinned and waved at his favorite purple haired psychotic kunoichi, "Hey Anko-nee-chan, what's up?"

He then noticed the kunoichi Anko was dragging behind her. 'How in the hell have I missed seeing her? I mean DAMN she's hot.' As Naruto watched the raven haired kunoichi running reluctantly behind Anko, something bothered him about her appearance. She moved so efficiently, not a single wasted motion even while being dragged along by Anko. The way her hair gleamed a blue-black in the sunlight and the glitter in her glaring eyes was so familiar. Suddenly he stiffened. 'What the hell! Sasuke?!'

Naruto watched the kunoichi closely for the mannerisms that were unique to his best friend and confirmed his previous suspicion. 'Holy hell it is him. What is Sasuke doing using the Sexy Jutsu? Are his fangirls that good?' Just as he finished the thought, Anko stopped in front of him with the female Sasuke in tow.

"How's my favorite blond loudmouth?"

Naruto looked at Sasuke, noting the irritation in her gaze and decided that he wouldn't blow Sasuke's cover, "I'm fine Anko-nee-chan. Who's your friend?"

"This is Usagi Sachiko. She just transfered to Konoha and when I saw her beat down a groper I decided she'd make a good friend and since she'd new I wanted to introduce her to you."

Naruto had to bite his tongue at the name but the laughter escaped at the thought of a female Sasuke being groped, "A-ha-ha-ha-ha t-that guy must have been pissing his pants after she was done with him!"

"Not really, he called her a crazy bitch and, well you know me."

Naruto settled down to snickers, "You scared the shit out him didn't you Anko-nee-chan?"

Sachiko answered, "Very effectively."

He eyed the raven, "I can imagine. So how long have you been in Konoha Sachiko-chan?"

Sachiko twitched, "Isn't that rather forward Uzumaki-san?"

Naruto grinned, "I use chan with every girl I meet so it's either Sachiko-chan or Azami."

Sachiko grit her teeth. Either deal with the affectionate honorific or be called a thistle flower, not much of a choice, "Sachiko-chan then Uzumaki-san."

"Meh don't be so formal Sachiko-chan, just call me Naruto ne?"

"No."

He chuckled, "Okay, could you drop the san then?"

Sachiko rolled her eyes, "Fine Uzumaki it is."

"So how long have you been in Konoha?"

"I arrived today."

Naruto raised his eyebrow, "Did Anko-nee-chan drag you here before you got settled?"

"I had been about to get groceries."

Naruto smiled and turned to Anko only to be greeted with empty space. 'Oh boy Anko's matchmaking again.' He shook his head and faced Sachiko again, "I'll help you get your stuff."

The raven jerked back, "You don't have to do that Uzumaki."

Naruto smiled and looped Sachiko's arm through his, might as well get some fun out of the teme's predicament for now. After all it wasn't every day he got to make Sasuke uncomfortable, "Don't be silly. It's the least I can do Sachiko-chan."

Sachiko groaned inwardly. 'Shit shit shit SHIT. Even the usuratonkachi's fooled by this form...' Just then the inner sadistic prankster that every Uchiha possessed but hid decided to give the raven an evil idea. 'If the dobe doesn't know it's me then this is the perfect chance to mess with him.' The disguised Sasuke let an evil smile creep over her face as the plot to prank the king of the pranksters ran through her mind.

"Very well Uzumaki-kun. I'll accept you're help."

Naruto blinked at the addition of the honorific and felt a disturbing feeling spread in his gut at the look on Sachiko's face. 'Why do I suddenly get the feeling that I'm screwed?'

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Naruto shifted uncomfortably as Sachiko's breasts brushed against his arm when she reached for a ripe peach. The raven had been subtlely flirting all afternoon and even though Naruto knew that it was really Sasuke in disguise, the Uchiha was fucking hot in female form and Naruto had caught himself responding the way any guy would to a hot chick flirting with him. 'I am so going to get even with Sasuke for this. He's doing this just to dick around with me.'

Sachiko noticed the frown on Naruto's face and brushed her fingers over his bicep, "Uzumaki-kun is something wrong?"

Naruto shook himself out of his plots to make Sasuke pay for messing with him and smiled at her, "No. I was just thinking of something I'm to talk with a friend of mine about."

"Oh. I hope you and your friend don't argue."

Naruto shrugged, "He and I always argue, it's inevitable."

"Then how can you still be friends?"

Naruto dearly want to jack-slap the raven for the question since the 'girl' knew the answer already, "We understand each other and we never strike at each other's tender spots. Not to mention I went through too much crap to get his ass back home, there's no chance in hell I'd let that bond break."

Sachiko smiled gently, "That's good."

They continued getting produce with Sachiko teasing Naruto and the blond doing his best to ignore the flirting. Right as Naruto was about to snap and shake Sachiko so hard her teeth would rattle, the perfect opportunity for revenge called his name.

"Hey Naruto! Who's your friend?"

Naruto grinned and turned to face Sakura and Ino as the two came over, "Hey Sakura-chan, Ino-chan. This is Usagi Sachiko. She's new to Konoha."

Sakura eyed the young woman who'd tensed and begun to glare at the pinkette, "Really? I didn't know we were getting a new transfer."

The raven smiled in that insultingly sweet way she'd seen women do when they're insulting another woman, "Well I guess you aren't as high up on the food chain as you thought."

Sakura's eyes widened then narrowed in consideration before she grinned and laughed, "I like her! What do you think Ino?"

Ino chuckled, "Yup she'll make a good addition to our ranks."

Sachiko's brow knit, "Huh?"

Sakura draped an arm over Sachiko's shoulders, ignoring the instinctive cringe, "If you'd just folded under then it would prove that you were a fangirl kunoichi like me and Ino used to be but since you spat right back at me you're definitely a real kunoichi, not a fangirl."

Sachiko eyed her oddly, "Why in the hell would you automatically assume that I was a fangirl?"

Ino buffed her nails on her shirt, "Because you were flirting with sunshine boy here. Most real kunoichi don't bother flirting with Naruto."

Sachiko folded her arms over her chest and glared at the blond woman, "Oh? and why not?"

"Because he's too goofy! Most who do flirt with him do it because they think it'll get them closer to the village hottie, Sasuke, not because they think Naruto is actually a good catch."

Ino and Sakura both snickered at the thought of Naruto being a good boyfriend and Sachiko bristled and snarled at them, "Then they're fools who can't look underneath the underneath to save their pathetic lives, much like you two."

Sakura gaped at the ravenette, "Excuse me?"

"I've only been in Uzumaki-kun's company for an afternoon and I can tell you he's a kind, considerate, gentleman who actually listens to what I say unlike most men. Any woman worth her salt would be honored to be with him and if they're not then they aren't worth his time."

Naruto was gawking at the raven in amazement. He could tell the she meant her words which were at odds with Sasuke's typical attitude. He laid a hand on her shoulder, "Sachiko-chan it's okay you don't need to defend me."

Sachiko whirled on him, "Aren't they supposed to be your friends? Normally friends would be talking you up to a woman who's showed interest in you, not putting you down. They should be ashamed of themselves."

Naruto didn't know what to say to that and Ino and Sakura were shell shocked so Sachiko grabbed the blond man's arm and pulled him to another section of the market, grumbling under her breath. She stopped by the tomatoes and began throwing some into a bag until a tanned hand caught her wrist gently, "I don't think you want that tomato Sachiko-chan."

She looked down and saw that the tomato she was holding was half rotten and dropped it before inspecting the other tomatoes in the bag. Naruto was smiling with gentle amusement when she muttered and put two more back then began testing the others. She caught sight of his smile from the corner of her eye and raised an eyebrow, "What?"

"You're pretty cute when you're flustered Sachiko-chan."

She blushed deeply enough to match the tomatoes and turned away from him, "D-don't be ridiculous Uzumaki-kun."

The ravenette berated herself in her head as the blush faded. 'What the hell is wrong with me? It's just Naruto so why am I so flattered and why the fuck am I blushing. I'm an Uchiha damn it! Uchiha's don't blush!' Unbeknownst to her Naruto had moved closer and when she turned back to him the blush returned full force. The blond smiled kindly, "I'm not being ridiculous Sachiko-chan. You are a very pretty girl and you get cute when you're all flushed and flustered. I'll bet you're magnificent when you totally lose your temper."

Sachiko's blush rocketed up a few degrees of red and Naruto flicked her on the tip of her nose, took the bag of tomatoes and paid for them. She tried to protest but he shook his head, "No I wanted to get them for you. I like thinking that I'm doing something to help keep those eyes of yours as beautiful as they are now."

She mentally cursed his ability to be charming when he put his mind to it. 'Damn usuratonkachi just HAD to be good at flirting. Why the hell is it affecting me like this?! It probably has something to do with the damn jutsu. Damn the dobe for coming up with it.' She continued cursing Naruto in her head as she finished her errands. As she was paying for the last of her groceries she heard Naruto call out, "Hey Baa-chan! You manage to kill today's paperwork?"

Sachiko turned to look with dread at the Hokage making her way over to them. The buxom blond smiled at Naruto, "No I just took off for a break."

"Shame on you Baa-chan. You shouldn't neglect your responsibilities."

"Ha! You'll hate the paperwork just as much as I do when you become Hokage brat."

"I doubt it. I have the ability to create and maintain a ton of Shadow Clones to do paperwork remember?"

The Hokage growled and smacked him upside the head, "Cocky little bastard aren't you?"

"Yup."

Just then Tsunade seemed to notice the ravenette next to Naruto and she smiled, "Well who do we have here? Your girlfriend?"

Naruto grinned evilly, "No this is Usagi Sachiko. She's a new transfer, but you should know that Baa-chan."

Tsunade narrowed her eyes and was about to correct Naruto when Sachiko made a few hand signs behind Naruto's back. Then the blond woman grinned. 'So Sasuke finally found a way to avoid his fangirls. Well all things have a price and I still haven't found a way to make the bastard pay for what he did to Naruto. Making him another male kunoichi in the ranks is the perfect payback.' She smiled sweetly, "Ah that's right Usagi-san. I'd forgotten but then you should have reported to me immediately."

Sachiko tensed, "I'm afraid a few things interfered and I forgot. Forgive me Hokage-sama."

The Godaime nodded, "Well we can remedy that right now. Naruto deliver those groceries to the Hokage tower while Usagi-san and I discuss her induction into the kunoichi ranks."

Naruto's eyes widened as he caught Tsunade's meaning when the blond woman draped an arm over the disguised Uchiha's shoulders and shunshined away. He began to chuckle then just burst out laughing as he thought of how pissed Sasuke would be when Tsunade told him that he'd be taking the same kind of seduction missions that Naruto did from now on.

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Tsunade gave the ravenette an order to change out of the dress and transform back then shoved her into a bathroom with a jonin uniform. She heard the tell-tale poof of a released jutsu. A few moments later Sasuke walked back into the office carrying the dress and other things Sachiko had been wearing. He bowed respectfully to Tsunade, "Thank you for not giving me away to Naruto Hokage-sama."

She smiled, "I take it that you were attempting to find some peace from your fangirls?"

"Yes."

"How'd you end up shopping with Naruto."

"A villager decided to grope 'Sachiko' and I retaliated. Mitarashi-san saw it and decided she liked me and wanted to introduce me to her favorite loudmouth. It snowballed from there."

Tsunade chuckled, "I see. How long were you in the Sexy Jutsu form?"

He blinked, "I believe that I transformed around one pm."

Tsunade looked at the clock, "It's a few minutes after six now and your chakra levels are still high. Perfect!"

Sasuke tensed, "Hokage-sama?"

She turned a blood chilling smile on him, "I've been looking for another shinobi to join 'Naruko' in the ranks."

Sasuke eyed her warily, "Who is Naruko?"

"Naruto's female form."

Sasuke's eyes would have popped out of his skull if he hadn't had years of Uchiha emotional control on his side, "Oh no."

"Oh yes. Sachiko will be going on seduction missions as soon as you complete the kunoichi classes. Shizune will be your teacher and don't bother trying to get out of this Uchiha or I swear I'll tell Naruto he was flirting with his best friend in Sexy Jutsu form."

Sasuke swallowed the argument that he'd begun forming and bowed to Tsunade. He felt a sense of dread creep up his spine and realized that he'd soon know exactly why Sakura got so much moodier one week out of each month. 'Shit.'

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Naruto dropped the groceries off with Shizune, hid, and waited until Sasuke left with them to walk into Tsunade's office, "You're evil Baa-chan."

The Hokage looked up and quirked a brow, "Oh? And what would you call yourself Naruto? You can't tell me that you didn't know that was Sasuke."

"I'm a little sadistic. I was sure that you'd call him out right there and then I could act like the surprised slightly horrified idiot after discovering I'd been flirting with my best friend, who started the flirting by the way."

Tsunade shook her head, "You two just have to mess with each other's heads don't you?"

Naruto shrugged, "He started it and I didn't ask or tell him to use the Sexy Jutsu."

"Well he'll be Sachiko 24/7 at least three days each month after Shizune finishes his instruction."

Naruto choked as he thought of the advanced kunoichi classes he'd had to take for true seduction missions, "Baa-chan you're not really gonna..." He trailed off when he saw the smug and satisfied look on her face. 'Shit she is. Sasuke is gonna kill me when he finds out I knew it was him all along.' Naruto shook it off and walked home occasionally entertaining himself by imagining Sasuke's expression when Shizune brought out the practice dildo to teach the Uchiha how to give a blow job.

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Ah Sasuke torture, it's good for the soul. I realize that I kinda bashed Sakura and Ino there and well I didn't mean to it just happened. And yes I know that Sasuke wasn't exactly in character but hey he's a girl at the moment. What did you think of this one? Good? Bad? Totally sucked? Reviews warm my heart and flames warm my dinner so let me have it with both barrels. See ya next time. Ja ne!