Closet Case: Reopened

I know that a lot of you readers out there are very fond of the Kaka/Iru pairing, and it fit in with the plot of the story so well that I decided to add a small side of Kaka/Iru to the fic. I still don’t own Naruto or any trademarks and copyrights related there of, though.
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Porn; Kakashi read it for many reasons, one of which being that he was a pervert. He couldn’t deny it. But he read porn for other reasons as well. Most days, at least as of late, he read the erotic books as a means to squelch his own desires for a certain fellow ninja.

However, that wasn’t why the famed copy-nin was reading- or rather glaring down at- Icha Icha Paradise Special Collectors Edition at that particular moment in time. No, no, no, it most certainly was not! Hatake Kakashi, renowned genius, wielder of one sharingan eye, and social retard, was attempting to tramp down a considerable pang of jealousy by distracting himself. And what better way to distract one’s self than with porn?

There was only one problem. While his lovely pornography collection could distract him from Mito Gai and his speeches about youth or virility or whatever it was the dark haired, green clad Jounin spouted off about, it didn’t seem to be able to do the same for jealousy. In fact, it did the opposite. Now, all he could picture was Iruka and Ebisu committing the many sexual acts described in the books.

What the hell had Iruka been doing in Ebisu’s apartment anyway? Iruka was not supposed to be in Ebisu’s apartment. Iruka was not supposed to be in Ebisu’s apartment, with only Ebisu for company. Iruka was not supposed to be in Ebisu’s apartment smiling, and blushing, and chatting, and touching the other man. Hell, Iruka and Ebisu weren’t even friends! So, again, the question, what had he been doing in Ebisu’s apartment?

Growling, Kakashi snapped his book shut and headed in the direction of the Missions office. He had a long day of stalking ahead of him, and he intended to figure out exactly what had gone on in that apartment before he had started to watch. In his haste, the copy-nin neglected to notice that his book had fallen from his pocket and now lay in the grass.

Moegi sighed, she and her legion of yaoi fan-girls had yet to agree on a suitable candidate for the title of Ebisu-sensei’s brand-spanking-new lover. She let out a little squeal as the image of her dear sensei being spanked, or perhaps doing some spanking came to mind. In fact, so engrossed was she in her little yaoi fantasy world, that she failed to pay attention to her surroundings, and wound up tripping over something, landing flat on her face.

Pushing herself up into a standing position, Moegi looked around for the object that had caused her rather embarrassing fall. Eventually her eyes settled upon a funny looking orange book. Picking it up, the young girl examined the cover, and found that it was one of those restricted books, the ones her parents wouldn’t allow her to read even though she was considered an adult by village law- she had the forehead protector to prove it and everything. Still, it wouldn’t do to leave the thing sitting out for anyone to pick up. What if some civilian child found it? That would just be bad. She would simply have to find its owner and return it to them.

Examining the cover once again, the girl’s eyes widened; she had seen it before, she was certain of it! It belonged to one of the village Jounin. Tucking it into a pocket, she headed to where most Jounin, who weren’t on away missions, could be found at that time of the day.

When Moegi entered the break room, every single head turned to look in her direction. She had never been the centre of so much attention before; the feeling caused a blush to creep up over her young features. Suddenly, she felt very nervous.

The girl dug the book out of her pocket, fumbling as she did so, and stuttered, “I- uh- does this belong to any of-” before she could finish the book fell from her hand as she was bumped into when a female Jounin entered the room. The book fell so that it was open the pages facing up. She hadn’t known the book had pictures! It was remarkably like her cousins doujinshi… only much, much more graphic.

“Hey!” she smiled brightly, her eyes gaining the same fan-girlish gleam they had when she had found her sensei in the supply closet with another man. “Ebisu-sensei can do that! And that too!” she chimed.

One of the Jounin had the decency to look scandalized, “Y-you saw your sensei doing these things?”

Moegi nodded enthusiastically, now in full yaoi fan mode. “Yeah, I saw him doing this,” she pointed at one of the panels depicted on the page, “and that,” yet another panel was pointed out. “Ooooh and that one right there!” she pointed to a panel in which the one partner was pinned to a wall, and contorted in such an odd angle that it seemed physically impossible, “Only, Ebisu-sensei was way more flexible than that…” she trailed off and giggled at the memory. Really, it was a wonder she wasn’t suffering from a nosebleed. Most of the other people in the room certainly were.

It was thusly that the search for Ebisu’s next possible suitor came to an end, for after that particular incident, they were lining up for a chance all on their own.

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So now Moegi and her fellow fan-girls no longer need to worry about recuitment.

Thank you very much for your reviews, DeadUchiha, SilentInquiry, blisblop, and even you you anon person!