Of Fox Grins and Mismatched Eyes

Of Fox Grins and Mismatched Eyes
A Collection of Kakashi x Naruto Shorts & Oneshots

By: ladygizarme
A/N: Thanks to everyone that's reviewed this collection so far. I really appreciate you guys' input! This one was written for the 2009 KakaNaru Kink Meme in the kakanaru community on lj:
http://community.livejournal.com/kakanaru/117692.html#cutid1
Please excuse my awful naming/titling sense. -__-;;
Prompt: kakashi's on a mission and demands phone sex from naruto when he stops at an inn...crack is welcome...8D
Warnings: not-quite-phone sex, somewhat of an attempt at crack, popping my KakaNaru smut-writing cherry, possible inadvertent tense-switching (because present-tense kept kicking past-tense’s ASS)


Icha Icha Recon

The world outside Kakashi’s window glows a warm orange, casting much of the room in shadow as the sun sinks below the horizon. Inside the inn, Kakashi finishes writing his recon report and sends it to Hokage-sama with the hawk formerly perched on his window ledge. Then, with plans for a much-needed rest before finishing his journey home, he pulls a well-worn orange book out of his flak jacket and settles on the bed.

He opens the book to his favorite chapter and starts to read. After only a handful of minutes, however, he is already growing restless. His eyes keep flitting from the page to the pack he’s left on the floor nearby, and each time he looks at the pack, his gaze is so focused one might think he were able to see straight through it to the item hidden within. Finally snapping his book shut, Kakashi goes over to his pack, pulls out the long-range radio and headset he uses to communicate with his recon team, and takes it back to the bed. With the headset in place, the radio in one hand, and his gaze casually concentrated on his lap, Kakashi flips the radio on.

Static meets his ears and he closes his one visible eye—his only outward sign of annoyance at the volume he left it on previously; not that anyone is there to see his expression, anyway. Gripping the channel dial between thumb and forefinger, Kakashi tunes in to channel one.

“Yellow Fox, this is Silver Dog, do you read me?”

A light crackle as he opens the channel, then silence.

He turns to channel two.

“Yellow Fox, this is Silver Dog, do you copy?”

This time, after a short moment of silence, there is the telltale crackle of someone about to respond. It makes Kakashi’s heart rate speed up a little in anticipation.

“Silver Dog, this is Black Bird. Yellow Fox had to switch to channel three earlier. Do you need our status report? Over.”

“No, I got it from Red Cat already.”

He tries to keep his disappointment out of his voice, but really… hearing Sai’s voice answer instead of Naruto’s is such a letdown. Not enough to kill the erection that has been tenting his trousers for the last ten minutes or so, but it surely wilted a fraction. Giving a sympathetic look to his still-covered happy place, Kakashi affects his usual laziness into his tone to cover his bit of irritation, all the while thinking of that last scene he reread in Icha Icha Tactics and how he would love the opportunity to try it out right this minute.

Oh well, at least now he knows where to find Naruto.

“Closing the channel now,” Kakashi tells Sai over the radio. “Maintain radio silence until the regularly scheduled status report, unless you run into trouble. Silver Dog out.”

He highly doubts they will have trouble. This mission involves very low-risk reconnaissance of the route the nobles would take from Konoha to Suna, where the Chuunin Exams are again being held.

If Naruto switched to channel three, though, he must be farther away than the rest of the team, still. Closer to Suna, most likely. Has he run into unforeseen trouble?

Kakashi tunes to channel three.

“Silver Dog to Yellow Fox, what is your status? Over.”

A loud crackle accompanies the almost-immediate reply.

“Yellow Fox here. Stopping for ramen before heading home. Did you need something Ka—erm… Silver Dog?”

Kakashi smirks through his mask as the steady flow of blood south immediately speeds up at the sound of Naruto asking that question. Yes, he definitely needs something.

There is another crackle as Naruto belatedly adds, “Uh… over?”

“Yes, I do need something from you, Yellow Fox…”

Kakashi pauses, feeling his excitement grow as he draws out the anticipation.

“Uh… Silver Dog?” Naruto cuts in uncertainly, when Kakashi hasn’t said anything after what Naruto deems a long enough wait.

Kakashi wonders if Naruto consciously suspects something is up, now, or if it is just a gut instinct making him seem nervous.

“I need my little kitsune to have phone sex with me,” he says bluntly, his tone light and airy—almost a singsong.

The radio squeaks and then screeches as a bit of feedback suddenly erupts on the channel. Then Kakashi hears Naruto hacking and sputtering as he cries out with strangled indignation, “Kakashi! I’m sitting at a ramen shop!”

Somehow, Kakashi is even more turned on by the thought of Naruto sitting at a counter, people all around him, his face burning red as he slurps his wet, slippery noodles—yes, that is a very alluring image at the moment.

“Then it’s a good thing only you can hear me through your earpiece, isn’t it?” Kakashi asks with an almost deviously innocent smile turning his eyes to crescents.

Naruto still has the line monopolized, though, so he doesn’t hear Kakashi as he continues coughing. “Crap, the noodles went down the wrong pipe! Ugh, I think there’s some in my nose…” Naruto seems to get himself under control again, and a significant pause follows before… “Hey, did you just call me that pet name I told you not to call me? …over.”

“I have no idea what you’re talking about. Over.”

Silence reigns for several minutes, and Kakashi’s hand moves unconsciously from the channel dial on the radio to rub lightly at his erection through his pants. When he realizes what he is doing, thanks to the tingle of pleasure suddenly spreading through him, a sly grin splits Kakashi’s face beneath his mask.

“Naruto, do you know what I’m doing right now?” he asks through the radio, voice huskier than before, no longer caring about following radio code protocol.

“..thing perverted, probably…” he hears in Naruto’s crackling reply.

Kakashi doesn’t even try to smother his low chuckle. “Oh, very. You see, my cock is so hard and needs attention so badly, and since you’re not here…” he finishes his trailed off sentence with a soft grunt of pleasure, squeezing himself through his pants. “Don’t you want to join me?”

Another extended silence. Kakashi is sure he can get what he wants if he pushes the right buttons, though.

“Ah, poor me, with a lover too uptight to participate in the fun of phone sex to help me get off. I guess I’ll have to do all the work myself, then…” Kakashi trails off again as he opens his pants and pulls them past his hips, hissing lowly as they drag past his erection—still trapped inside black boxer-briefs.

“..ese aren’t even phones…” Naruto’s voice mutters through the open channel.

That point is moot, seeing as there still aren’t very many places around with telephones installed, let alone places along the less-populated country border. Jiraiya had been ahead of his time when he’d written that phone sex scene in Icha Icha Tactics. The fact Naruto is even arguing in this vein tells Kakashi that Naruto is unable to ignore the temptation, though, which is a welcome sign.

“But it is your hand I’m imagining sliding into my boxers right now,” Kakashi replies as his long, callused fingers do just as he described. “Your fingers skating roughly up and down my cock. Mmm, Naruto, you tease…”

A hitched, quickened breath, accompanied by a low curse is Kakashi’s reply. After a handful of moments, Naruto finally speaks again. “Fine, you pervert, let’s do it.”

Naruto, ever the smooth talker. Kakashi doesn’t mind, though. More often than not, that brashness is what attracts his interest in the first place.

“Where are you now?”

“In an alley a few streets away from the ramen stand,” Naruto pants quietly. “Fuck, I can’t believe I’m letting you do this…”

“Do what?” Kakashi husks, gripping himself in his hand—but not moving; not yet. “Press you against the rough alley wall, trapping your body with mine as I grind slowly against you?”

Silence, but for the muted crackle of the open channel.

“My cock is hard, rubbing against you and digging into your hip. My mouth is on your neck and my teeth are nipping at that spot I know you like.” Kakashi’s husky timber is the epitome of ‘bedroom voice’, dripping with lust and need, urging his partner on. “Don’t forget to let me hear you, Naruto,” he reminds the man on the other end of the radio.

Heavier panting answers him through the earpiece. “Fuck.” Then a growl, “Don’t think I’m going to give you control so easily.”

Kakashi smirks, his tongue meeting the somewhat rough fabric of his mask as he unconsciously licks his lips. The slightly damp cloth makes his breath feel hot against his lips as his breathing quickens. “What are you going to do, then, little kitsune?”

Another growl meets Kakashi’s ear at his utterance of the taboo pet name, sending a shiver of delight down his spine.

Still with his voice growling in that wonderful way, Naruto answers, “I grab your ass and pull you to me roughly, grinding back against y—”

Naruto’s voice breaks off and Kakashi suspects he’s inadvertently let go of the mic button.

“Are you hard for me, Naruto?” Kakashi squeezes himself at that thought, his boxers absorbing a drop of precum before it can pearl at his tip.

“..es, I’m so hard for you. I’m grinding into you, pressing you into the bricks now. It’ll leave bruises, but I can’t let up.”

“I don’t mind. I like it.” Naruto’s breathing is audibly labored now, and Kakashi knows his own must sound similar to his blond lover.

“Touch me, Kakashi.”

“I am. Your cock is grinding against mine through our pants and I grip you tight, flipping you back against the wall.”

As Naruto moans into the radio, Kakashi finally pulls down his boxers, releasing his aching cock from its confines. Wrapping his hand firmly around it, he begins a torturously slow stroke.

“My hand’s in your hair and I kiss you hard. My hand is sliding into your open pants. What will I find, Naruto?”

“My cock. Hard and dripping. Waiting for you. Inside my boxers,” Naruto answers, the tempo of his words accompanied by his heavy breathing speaking volumes about how far gone he is already.

“Are you touching yourself for me now, Naruto?” Kakashi asks, a pearled drop of precum sliding down the underside of his cock as he squeezes himself again, stroking a little faster now.

His answer is another moan from Naruto through the light crackle of the radio.

“Pull your boxers down. Let your beautiful cock out to stroke it properly.”

The radio crackles as Naruto answers, “…lready did. It’s your hand stroking me.”

Naruto’s voice shakes slightly, and Kakashi can tell just from that that Naruto is working fast and rough.

“Touch yourself like I do. Firm but slow,” Kakashi orders as he also tries to mimic the way Naruto touches him.

Naruto’s panting stutters as he concentrates on imitating Kakashi’s touch on himself. “..nnh…okay…” he huffs. “Ka-Kakashi… I need more. Talk more. Please. Pull your mask down, I… want to hear you without it.”

Kakashi obediently pulls the cloth off his mouth, the mask now circling his neck like a strange sort of collar. He licks his lips again, wetting them from the dryness his heavier breathing has caused, as his hand again finds the talk button for the radio.

“It’s gone. Is that better, Naruto?” Kakashi pretends Naruto is right there, and he’s whispering into his ear huskily.

“Ye—” a crackle interrupts Naruto’s reply. “..k more, Kakashi. Tell me what you’re doing…”

“I’m gripping myself the way you do. Mmm… My fingers are hot and rough, stroking fast…” Kakashi’s hand is barely lubricated by drops of precum, but it’s just the way things usually are when it’s Naruto’s hand, helping with the illusion. The friction is familiar and delicious.

“Ahh… fuck… my thumb is..pressing into my slit..the way you do…” Naruto tells him. “I need to..go faster, Kakashi…!”

“Go faster…ahh…Naruto…”

Imagining Naruto stroking himself, his hand moving frantically, spurs Kakashi’s own hand even faster, his hips flexing up into his hand.

“..s…yesss…oh God…m-more..so clo—”

Naruto’s moans crackling straight into his ear drown Kakashi’s senses in euphoria, his steadily-building orgasm suddenly rushing at him.

“Ahh! Naruto..I’m coming! Come with me…” Kakashi doesn’t let his hand stop, completely milking his orgasm from his suddenly oversensitive manhood with the same firm—almost forceful—touch Naruto uses on him.

He lays there, panting, staring almost disconnectedly at his cum-covered hand as he catches his breath. After a few moments, the nearly-silent crackle over the radio becomes blatantly noticeable, calling his attention to the fact that he can no longer hear Naruto’s voice. He didn’t even get to hear Naruto come.

“..Naruto?”

Silence reigns for several moments. Then, the click of someone coming on the line fills him with momentary relief.

“I knew dickless would have performance issues. It’s only natural when you’re—”

The cold that washes through Kakashi at the sound of that voice is entirely opposite from the warmth that flooded his body with his orgasm. Then he hears another voice—this time female—cut Sai off in the background, and can’t help but smirk in wry amusement.

“Sai, get off the freaking radio and help me get your pants off!”

He hears their radio click off the line. Then, mere seconds later, it clicks again.

“..knew those two were goin’ at it.”

Kakashi smiles, hearing the lazy amusement in Naruto’s voice. “Ah, you’re back,” he says a bit teasingly.

“Yeah…” a crackle interrupts him. “..orry about that,” Naruto says a bit sheepishly.

Kakashi asks with smarmy confidence, “So it was good for you, then?”

“..ike you don’t know! I can’t believe you made me come in an alley, listening to you moan my name! Perv,” despite his supposed complaint, Naruto’s voice is affectionate.

“You know you like it,” Kakashi tries to respond, but realizes Naruto is still on the radio.

“You need a new favorite Icha Icha chapter. Sex over crackling radio channel will never catch on.”

~*~*~*~*~
End