Questionable Loyalty

CHAPTER 39







This changed in the Akatsuki base after Kakashi finally gave in to the Leader’s advances, but at the same time, they stayed the same. His mission and the plans for the future did not change. At first, even his daily routine didn’t change much – he still spent his day almost alone – unless he summoned Pakkun or saw Kisame, and in the evenings he went to his lover to proceed with their lessons. Once they were done, Pein began a different sort of lesson – only this time, he was the teacher. His passion for Kakashi seemed to be unsatiable. And while he was the consummate professional while he was working or studying – nothing was allowed to distract his attention from the task at hand – he also had no problem to take the Jounin on the floor of his office, or bend him over the top of his desk.



More often than not Kakashi had to use soothing creams afterwards to heal the soreness left behind after their desperate couplings. Not that he minded the slight discomfort. It was a reminder of his activities during the night – of all the things he had learned and experienced, all the pleasure bestowed upon him by his lover. If it were up to Kakashi, he wouldn’t have used the cream at all, but Pein was an insistent man and more often than not applied it himself – his gentle fingers smearing the soft substance over Kakashi’s reddened entrance gently before slipping in carefully to spread it inside as well. By that time Kakashi was far too sated to be able to get hard again from the tantalizing touch, nevertheless he enjoyed it greatly and sometimes caught himself daydreaming about it during the more than he did of the actual sex.



It had taken him a little while to figure out why it happened like that, but in the end he admitted to himself that he craved the affection. He craved the way Pein’s strange eyes softened to a warm silvery colour instead of their usual stormy gray while he looked down at him as he spread the cream, his other hand planted on his inner thigh and keeping his legs spread, fingers gently massaging the tired muscles. It was such an intensely intimate act, it left Kakashi utterly vulnerable and helpless, and yet he felt completely secure – more so than he had ever felt while stayed in his small apartment in Konoha. It wasn’t surprising that he fell asleep like that once, only to awaken late in the morning in a large, soft bed that definitely wasn’t his.



He opened his eye and carefully looked around, realizing that he was in a spacious bedroom, furnished in the traditional style, even if the bed itself wasn’t a futon but a mattress on a low wooden base. The sheets were dark and satiny-soft and the bed itself was quite large and luxurious, the pillows under his head soft and fluffy. On the pillow next to his there was head-shaped hollow but the sheets were cold. Apparently Pein had got up much earlier.



‘Am I feeling this safe around him that I can’t feel him moving around while I sleep?’ Kakashi asked himself incredulously.



After a short hesitation he got up and noticed that his lover had left a long pale-blue yukata by the bed. Gratefully he wrapped it around his naked body and left the bedroom in search of a bathroom.



It turned out that Pein’s apartment wasn’t very big but also it certainly wasn’t small – it certainly was larger than Kakashi’s quarters, and while the furniture was just as austere as it was in the Jounin’s place, it was much more personalized. In the living-room he saw a sword put in a simple katana-kake1 by the wall, along with numerous shelves filled with all sorts of origami figures, all beautifully folded in all sorts of shapes and colours. The katana was well-used - its saya well-worn and scratched in several places as it had apparently been used to block attacks. The origami figures were made from all kinds of paper – from creased napkins and newspaper to high-quality gold-leaf covered paper. The entire display was meticulously cleaned, not a single spec of dust on them which meant that it was important to Pein because Kakashi was sure that the man didn’t allow any servants in here.



Despite his protesting bladder he stayed for a little, examining the display curiously. Then he noticed the photograph. Set in a small frame, it was partially hidden behind katana-kake. Curiously, Kakashi reached and took it out, looking down at it.



It was a frozen moment in time, a moment of happiness, apparently, because three smiling faces were looking up at him from the photo. Well, one grinning face and two smiling faces. On the picture there were two young men and a girl, all dressed in poor, often-patched, if clean clothes. And one of the people was Pein. A much younger Pein, without any piercings and with surprisingly vibrant blue eyes stared challengingly right at the camera, his full lips stretched in the aforementioned grin. His hands arms were wrapped around the shoulders of the other two – a pretty young woman with blue hair and another red-head – this time a colour much darker than Pein’s, his eyes obscured by his hair, a soft, timid smile playing on his mouth. The young man’s head was laid on Pein’s shoulder, his arms wrapped around his middle, their bodies touching from shoulder to hip. The body language was obvious and for a moment Kakashi felt a pang of jealousy before firmly stomping on it and reminding himself that these were probably Pein’s orphan friends and they were long-dead.



He carefully returned the photograph on its previous spot and went to search for the toilet.



Pein’s bathroom was no different than the rest of the apartment – spacious and well-furnished, with a bathtub large enough to hold the whole Akatsuki and a showerstall next to it. Surprisingly enough, there was no mirror in it – as there hadn’t been any in the whole place. Strange.



After using the toilet and washing, Kakashi ran his fingers over the stubble on his chin and decided that he’d shave when he returned to his place. His clothes from yesterday were missing, so he wrapped himself in the yukata again left the bathroom to find the exit of Pein’s apartment.



A minute later he discovered the front door, opened it and stuck his head out, blinking in surprise when he saw Pein’s office. From the other side the door was camouflaged as part of the wall, that’s why he hadn’t seen it before. The red-head was at his desk, once again buried in work, but when he heard the door opening he looked up and met Kakashi’s eyes.



“Good morning.” He said and gave him a soft smile – he’d been smiling more and more lately, even if it was never wide enough to show his teeth.



“Good morning.” Kakashi answered and slid through the door.



“Did you sleep well?”



The Jounin nodded and looked down at his feet uncomfortably.



“I’m sorry I wasn’t able to wait for you to wake up.” The red-head apologized.



“It’s not that.” Kakashi walked up to the desk and sat down on the chair next to it. “I just wasn’t expecting you’d let me in your place.” He smiled then “To be honest, I wasn’t sure that you even have one.” His smile turned wider “I had already decided that you have a sleeping pod or something.”



Pein’s own smile froze on his face and he looked back at his documents.



“I am sorry.” He said soft, then reached and took Kakashi’s hand in his own, bringing it to his lips and kissing the inside of his wrist and then his palm. Kakashi’s eye drooped immediately and he sighed with delight.



“How about we go for a walk today?” Pein suggested.



“A walk? YOU want to go out?” The Jounin asked him incredulously. The other shrugged:



“I spend almost all of my time here, dealing with day to day problems regarding Akatsuki. Other than our main operative agents, we have a vast network of spies and allies – someone needs to mind them all. But even I need to get out of here from time to time.” He closed his folder and looked back at Kakashi. “Before… I just didn’t feel like doing so alone.”



It was said in a calm, even tone but Kakashi recognized it for what it was – a confession. He saw Kakashi as a partner, as a companion, and the thought of it elated the younger man. He made an effort to stay calm and nod.



“Me neither.” He said softly.



Pein gave him his minute smile again and pulled him in for another kiss.



“Now, why don’t you go and change into your own clothes and have breakfast…” he looked at the clock on the wall “…lunch, and then we can go out.”



“Where are we going?”



“To the outskirts of the village. I want to show you something.”



Kakashi looked out of the large windows.



“It’s pouring again…”



“Don’t worry about it. Go now.”



Kakashi nodded and left.



An hour later, well-fed and clothed in pants and shirt and carrying a robe to protect him from the rain, he returned to Pein’s office. His lover appeared to be finishing his work and was putting his desk in order before shedding his own cloak and leaving it on the chair.



“Leave the cloak, you won’t need it.” He said.



Kakashi blinked with surprise, then hesitantly left the cloak on Pein’s desk. The red-head took his hand in an open gesture of affection and led him out of the room. Once they went down to the first floor and got out of the building, Pein let go of him pressed his hands together in several seals, then lifted them and looked up towards the sky, the raindrops sliding down the smooth skin of his pale face and into his damp hair. The rain began to lessen considerably before stopping completely and the sky cleared out of all clouds, the sun shining brightly and warmly over the wet, shimmering buildings. Kakashi stared at his lover in surprise.



“You command the rain?!” he said incredulously and Pein nodded.



“Yes. Don’t misunderstand, it DOES rain a lot in Ame, but I also use it as a surveillance instrument. The moment a single drop falls on an intruder, I’d know.” He explained.



“Should you be telling me such a big secret?” Kakashi asked softly, touched by Pein’s trust.



“I trust you, Kakashi.” The other answered, and reached to take his hand again. “Don’t worry, I have other means through which to watch over Amegakure. Now, shall we go?”



After they left the area with the skyscrapers, they took to the roofs and eventually left Amegakure and headed for the mountains.



“Where are you leading me?” Kakashi asked again.



“To a place I haven’t visited in years.” The other explained cryptically and Kakashi gave up on asking him.



When they finally arrived and got out of the thick forest they were met with a breath-taking view – a series of rocks, arches and gorges and walkways, sinks and caves, carved away in the soft blue-green rock by the incessant rain, mostly clear of vegetation other than the ever-present ivy that wrapped itself over every free surface.



“This is…” Kakashi said, too awed to be able to express it with words.



“Beautiful?” Pein suggested.



Kakashi nodded.



“And secure as well. It’s far enough from the main city to hide in, and the numerous caves provide warm, dry shelter. Come now.”



For a Ninja, it was no problem to navigate through the maze of rocks and plants, but for a normal person it’d have been absolutely impossible. Pein lead him with a sure step, obviously knowing where he was going. Finally they reached the narrow mouth of an ivy-obscured cave and the red-head let him in, taking out an electric torch from his pocket to light their way. Soon they reached a small hall with a hole on the ceiling that let in a bright ray of a light. Someone had dug a depression in the rock under the hole, now filled with clear rainwater. Close to the depression there were the remains of an old fireplace, and by the walls were lined several animal hides, their fur still thick and warm if quite dusty. Pein turned to him and said:



“I’ve wanted to bring you here for some time now.”



Kakashi slowly sat down next to the water hole.



“What is this place?”



Pein went to the corner and grabbed one of the larger hides, shaking the dust off it and then dragging it to Kakashi. They curled on it together.

“My friends and I… we lived here for a while.” Pein explained as his fingers buried themselves in Kakashi’s hair as the younger man laid his head on his chest.



“In the cave?”



“Yes. Quite a while, actually. It was a safe-haven. This whole area is so riddled with caves and finding someone here would be quite difficult, unless you know exactly where you’re going. So we made it our lair, after we abandoned the house in the park.” He was quiet for a while, then softly admitted “You’re the first person whom I’ve brought here after we left.”



Kakashi’s fingers tightened on Pein’s shirt.



“Thank you. For trusting me so much.”



Pein’s hand covered his.



“I was alone for so long before you came. I should be the one thanking you.”



“You’re welcome.” Kakashi said and offered his lover a cheeky grin. “What about Itachi?”



Pein shrugged.



“He’s Kisame’s lover, you know that. Whatever happens between me and him, or even between me and Kisame, is not part of any relationship.” He frowned “I think that at the moment I have a tad too much dignity to be a third wheel.”



Kakashi lifted his head to look at him straight in the face.



“You and Kisame?” he asked incredulously.



Pein looked uncomfortable, but nodded.



“Yes. Sometimes.”



The Jounin laid his head back on his chest with a huff.



“Do you have sex with the whole Akatsuki or something?”



“Only those I consider family.” The red-head responded.



“Family.” Kakashi said flatly. He tried to digest the information. “Who is it that you consider family?” he asked in the end, trying to sound as neutral as possible.



“Those whom I trust on a personal level, of course.” He said it like it was the most natural thing in the world. Nope, Kakashi didn’t understand. At all. He tried again:



“Pein… why do you think that you’re supposed to have sex with, uh, your family?”



“Well… with the male ones, anyway…” Pein said thoughtfully. “There’s only been one girl, and I wasn’t attracted to her that way. And even if I were…” his face darkened “It’d have only hurt her further.”



Pein was being cryptic again and although Kakashi was morbidly curious, he decided not to press the girl issue for now.



“Is it because of your friend? The one with the dark-red hair?”



Pein’s eyes widened and for a moment he looked panicked before asking sharply:



“How do you know about him?”



The angry tone frightened Kakashi.



“I saw the photo by the Origami display in your living-room.” He explained in a small voice. “I didn’t mean to pry.”



Pein’s tense, angry expression slowly seemed to relax.



“My friend and I were that close, yes. We grew up together, begged for food together, stole together, fought side by side together. In the end, it was only natural that we made love to express our bond. We were family after all.”



Kakashi began to understand.



“Then… am I family too?” he asked so softly that it was barely audible.



Pein looked down at him seriously.



“More than that. You’re my companion.”