Of Fox Grins and Mismatched Eyes

Of Fox Grins and Mismatched Eyes
A Collection of Kakashi x Naruto Shorts & Oneshots

By: ladygizarme
A/N: Holy crap, you guys! Five more star ratings already?! Even though there haven’t been any new reviews yet, stars are awesome, too. Thanks a lot! ^_^ (Reviews are still love, though. =3)
Here’s another one written for the 2009 KakaNaru Kink Meme in the kakanaru community on lj:
http://community.livejournal.com/kakanaru/117692.html#cutid1
Please excuse my awful naming/titling sense. Again. -__-;;
Prompt: Naruto finds out that Kakashi has "designs" on Iruka and he... tries to cockblock, basically, so Kakashi decides to go after Naruto as a sort of recompense... Triple (Word Score) points for getting Naruto to top!
Warnings: hmmmm… the usual, and nothing explicit (unfortunately?)


Cockblock

It hadn’t taken long to realize what was going on. Every time he went to visit Iruka, he was there. Monopolizing Iruka’s time, butting into their conversations, being a third wheel when they went out for ramen together, casting sly smirks his way whenever Iruka initiated physical contact with him—a sweet smile on the teacher’s face.

Oh, yes, he knew what was going on. And, as he again leaned into Iruka’s classroom—intent on inviting him out for lunch—and found the two of them once again together—chatting amicably—it was obvious today would be no different. His gaze narrowed as he watched them interact, his gaze sliding his way just enough to let him know he was fully aware of the situation.

Well, he wouldn’t let him get away with it. No, sir! He knew just how to deal with this.

“Kakashi-sensei!” that familiar, boisterous voice suddenly called out to him, acting for all the world like their private rivalry for Iruka’s attention wasn’t happening at all.

With a smile curving his eye closed, Kakashi dropped from the window ledge. “Naruto, Iruka-sensei! Fancy seeing you here!”

Iruka looked torn between blushing from flattery—no doubt expecting Kakashi’s usual flirting—and turning red in indignance—of course Kakashi would find him there. Before Iruka could respond, though (and he definitely looked like he was about to explode with his response—whatever it may be), his blond companion cut the Academy teacher off preemptively.

“What are you doing here, Kakashi-sensei?” Naruto asked with a false grin.

As if he didn’t know.

“If you’ve come to ask me to lunch, I’m afraid Naruto’s already asked me,” Iruka informed him with a kind, apologetic smile.

Kakashi could see a smirk of triumph lurking just beneath Naruto’s showy smile.

“You can join us if you like. You won’t mind, will you, Naruto?”

There was something in Iruka’s tone that spoke volumes about whether Naruto would actually be permitted to argue. Now it was Kakashi’s turn to hide his smirk. His mask did wonders for that.

“But, Iruka-sensei—” Naruto argued anyway.

Kakashi wondered if he just imagined the sly look Iruka turned to Naruto then. “Don’t worry. I’ll still treat you,” he said in a tone familiar when hearing Iruka speak to his precious former student.

Naruto gave Iruka a disappointed look.

“Actually, I was hoping to treat Naruto today. I don’t mind treating both of you, though,” Kakashi said with a smile, interrupting some sort of silent battle between former student and teacher.

Iruka and Naruto both turned to Kakashi and blinked at him, obviously caught off guard by this development.

“Oh… okay, then,” Iruka agreed, another sweet smile on his face. “Well, shall we go, then?”

The three of them walked to Ichiraku’s in seemingly companionable silence—Naruto between Kakashi and Iruka the whole way, as usual. Normally, Kakashi would stew silently in irritation, his eyes smiling deceptively as he occasionally made offhand, (not-so-)cleverly-disguised suggestions that Naruto would rather spend his time elsewhere. This time, though, he had a plan. A plan that involved him brushing his arm or fingers against Naruto’s as they walked, smiling genuinely every time the blond barely-a-man looked at him with suspicious curiosity.

The three of them sat at the counter, Naruto still in the middle, and ordered their preferred flavors of ramen. Mysteriously, though, midway through his bowl, Iruka suddenly remembered something he had to do, and left them alone—casting a glance between Kakashi and Naruto as he left. Kakashi watched Iruka leave, wondering if the scarred-nosed teacher had caught on to Kakashi’s intentions. Wondering if he’d seen underneath the top layer of Kakashi’s plan, or merely thought that Kakashi really was after Naruto instead of Iruka.

Before he could worry too much about it, though, Naruto’s face was blocking his view of the teacher’s retreating behind, his whisker-marked face and bright blue eyes showing a quiet but angry determination.

“I know what you’re doing,” Naruto informed him.

Kakashi leaned a little more into his personal space, propping an elbow on the counter as he leaned onto his hand, his mask barely hiding his amusement. “And what is that?”

“You’re trying to throw me off-track so you can take advantage of my distraction and get to Iruka-sensei. I’m telling you now: it’s not gonna happen.”

Kakashi put a hand to his chest. “I’m deeply hurt, Naruto.” He made a show of sighing deeply and shook his head sadly. “I just wanted to spend some quality time with my cute student, and this is the thanks I get.”

Naruto snorted cynically and turned back to his ramen, shaking his head. “Yeah, right. You expect me to believe you when you’re always saying weird crap like that?” the boy grumbled, only a faint trace of the blush Kakashi had been expecting coloring his cheeks.

Okay, Kakashi decided, it was time to lay on the charm. Leaning close, he put his arm over Naruto’s shoulder and vowed softly, “Ah, but it’s true. You are my cute student.”

Naruto’s shoulders tensed and Kakashi almost counted it as a victory when he felt Naruto start to shiver, Kakashi’s proximity and tone of voice obviously affecting him. However, in the next instant, Naruto was out of his seat, fists clenched so tightly his arms were shaking as he glared down at Kakashi in indignation.

“That’s exactly what I’m talking about, sensei. You’ve said crap like that for as long as I can remember, and now you’re trying to use it to charm me but it’s just… creepy!”

Saying this and following it with a firm nod, he pulled out his frog wallet, took out a handful of money, and slammed it down on the counter before storming away.

Kakashi was left blinking, caught a little off guard by Naruto’s sudden departure. Feeling a little put-out that Naruto had completely brushed him off and paid for his own meal (he would save contemplation of why he cared that he didn’t get to pay for later), Kakashi had one thought that might assuage his mild irritation—Naruto had gone in the opposite direction from the Academy. That meant that Iruka was alone now.

Score one for Hatake Kakashi.

However, when he peeked in Iruka’s classroom window, he found the teacher already occupied with his afternoon class.

Damn. He would have to try for dinner.

When he peeked in the room at the end of the school day, though, a certain blond had already beaten him to the punch, yet again.

“Oh, Kakashi!” Iruka greeted in slight surprise. “Looking for dinner plans? Or are you here on official business?”

Kakashi’s visible eye crooked closed in a smile. Iruka knew him so well. “I’m always on official business, Iruka-sensei,” he answered smarmily. “So, about those dinner plans…”

“He’s going to dinner with me,” Naruto answered immediately with his arms crossed over his chest, this time making no attempt to hide his irritation with Kakashi.

His blue eyes positively blazed with it, giving Kakashi a thrilling rush when he finally opened his eyes to lock gazes with the petulant boy. Sometimes he almost wondered if he didn’t enjoy this little fight with Naruto over Iruka just a little too much.

Iruka gave a smile that was a mixture of nervousness and apology. “A-actually, Naruto, I hadn’t given you my answer yet. I have to work in the missions office tonight so… why don’t you two go? I’m sure you still have plenty of catching up to do. You haven’t seen each other much since Naruto got his own squad, have you?”

‘I see him every time I try to see you,’ Kakashi thought crankily, but his smile remained (no matter that it was hidden beneath his mask).

Naruto was giving Iruka a crestfallen look, but Kakashi decided this was another great chance to continue his plan. He couldn’t give up, because he knew Naruto never would. That was part of his nindo, after all.

Continuing to smile, he lightly agreed, “That’s a great idea, Iruka-sensei. Actually, I have been wanting to catch up with Naruto lately, but he had to leave rather abruptly at lunch, so we didn’t really get a chance to talk.”

Iruka glanced at Naruto, a look almost too quick to notice without his Sharingan uncovered, but Kakashi did notice and felt a tug of curiosity. The look had been one of disappointment—convincing Kakashi that Iruka knew Naruto had purposely bailed on him—but for some reason, Kakashi thought there was more to it than just disapproval of Naruto’s rude behavior. It almost looked like pity.

Apparently, Naruto thought so too, because then his angry glare was turned to Iruka. “I had better stuff to do than sit there and listen to his pathetic innuendo,” the blond declared, pointing accusatorily at Kakashi while still glaring at Iruka.

Iruka gave Kakashi a smile that was strained by the all-too-familiar desire to raise his voice and tell him off.

“I’m sure Kakashi-sensei is harmless,” Iruka answered Naruto in a tone as strained as his smile, his gaze still on Kakashi as if in warning.

Kakashi merely smiled in response, doing his best to appear harmless as his visible eye curved into a crescent.

Iruka gave a small sigh of relief and grabbed his things. “Well, I’d better go,” he said with a pat to Naruto’s shoulder. “Have a nice dinner!” he called almost sternly over his shoulder as he left the room.

Then Naruto’s glare was back on Kakashi, and Kakashi was still smiling, not letting his former student’s irritation deter him.

With a defeated sigh, Naruto finally said with slightly-forced cheerfulness, “Well, let’s go then! It’s still a bit early for dinner, but anytime’s a good time for ramen! You’re paying, right?”

Kakashi supposed Naruto had come to the decision that a free meal was a free meal, after all. There was an edge to his voice in that last question, though, and suddenly Kakashi felt very worried for his wallet.

Half an hour later, there were two towers of ramen bowls stacked on the counter between Kakashi and Naruto. All of them were Naruto’s; Kakashi’s empty bowl had already been retrieved by Teuchi-san, but the old man seemed to get a sort of satisfaction out of watching Naruto’s towers of empty bowls grow. Kakashi figured it was Naruto’s way to put a physical barrier between them, seeing as all the other seats at the ramen stand were full and Naruto had had no choice but to sit beside his suspicious former teacher.

Despite Naruto’s efforts, Kakashi continued his plan as if the obstruction wasn’t there at all. He sat as close as possible to Naruto without actually falling off his own stool, and kept finding reasons to touch Naruto, or lean closer to whisper something lowly—as if they were having a private conversation more important than the innuendo-laced remarks Kakashi kept hitting Naruto with.

After a particularly good one concerning Naruto’s skill at slurping up those long, slippery noodles, Naruto choked slightly on said noodles and turned a familiar indignant glare to his tormentor.

“You wanna know why Iruka-sensei will never go for you?”

Suddenly, Kakashi felt much less playful, his attention now quite keenly concentrated on Naruto’s voice rather than his physical reactions to Kakashi’s teasing.

“Why is that?” Kakashi couldn’t stop himself from asking, forgetting his plan for a moment.

Blue eyes narrowed as Naruto leaned into Kakashi’s face, and Naruto wore a feral grin—all sharp teeth showing from between curled-up lips—as he answered, “Because you’re all talk, sensei.”

That said, Naruto got up, and Kakashi was again left alone at the ramen stand—this time with quite the considerable bill to take care of.

Kakashi didn’t go in search of Iruka or Naruto for several days. Try as he might to disregard Naruto’s naïve words (and they were naïve; what did Naruto know about it? Of course it seemed to the blond that Kakashi couldn’t follow through with his intentions—because he was always getting in the way of them!), Kakashi just couldn’t seem to forget them.

After days of silently denying that the accusation bothered him, Kakashi finally had to admit the truth—at least to himself. It was time to take real action. However, when he went to the mission room that day in search of Iruka…

“Oh, Kakashi-sensei, you’re just in time!” the ponytailed teacher informed him with a smile and a beckoning wave.

Kakashi’s pulse sped up a fraction as he approached the kind teacher, absolutely sure that today was his lucky day—Iruka was finally going to respond to his advances!

“No way, Iruka-sensei! Not him!” Naruto complained from where he was standing on one side of the mission room.

As simple as that, Kakashi knew his hopes had been dashed again.

“Now, now, Naruto,” Iruka placated. Though his exasperation with the belligerent boy was obvious, he also seemed slightly amused. Kakashi found it curious, but had no time to consider the reason for it. “Kakashi-sensei is the best match for this mission, since you two already have a camaraderie that will make teamwork easy. Besides, we really can’t spare anyone else at the moment.”

That was how Kakashi found himself alone in the woods with the recent bane of his love life’s existence. They’d completed their mission quite easily, quickly finding the thieves that had stolen an important scroll from a shrine on the outskirts of Fire Country, and now they were heading back home. Kakashi had kept his mind on the task the entire time, or so he’d convinced himself, until he suddenly noticed the way his thoughts were drifting into previously-unexplored territory while he watched Naruto’s ass as he jumped from tree to tree ahead of Kakashi. It was just so… round yet tight and perfectly grabbable (or so he’d just been imagining—among other things). Inviting; that was the ideal word for it.

In order to distract himself, Kakashi took out his favorite book and started flipping through to find his favorite part. This forest was so well-known to him, even jumping from branch to branch while reading was a trivial task. He was becoming perfectly absorbed in the lusty adventures of the main character when he heard a snort—part amusement, part derision—from right beside him. His eye didn’t need to leave the page to know who it was, but it slid to the side for a moment anyway.

He glimpsed a smirk of cynical triumph—an expression that didn’t really fit Naruto’s still quite boyish face, in Kakashi’s opinion—before it blurred with the rest of the scenery and he focused his eye ahead again.

“Something funny, Naruto?” he asked dryly.

The snort from before was repeated before Naruto answered, “Not at all. It’s sort of sad, really… you really are just all talk. Actually, not even that…”

Kakashi was getting really irritated with that line—the very same one that had been nagging him nearly constantly for over a week before this mission.

“I fail to see how you can come to that conclusion,” he said boredly, flipping the page in his book despite not having read that page all the way through.

“It’s simple, sensei,” Naruto answered mockingly. “You spend most of your free time either reading or spouting stupid innuendo and cheesy lines from that book, but you don’t ever take any real action unless it’s in combat.”

Suddenly, Kakashi decided he would throw all pretense to the wind and directly confront his problem. “If you’re insinuating about my attempts to garner a date with Iruka-sensei, I hardly think my current lack of success can be counted. It’s your fault, after all,” he calmly accused, turning another half-read page.

Innuendo, indeed; even Naruto wasn’t coming straight out with what he meant.

That earned a bark of laughter; short and loud. “You want to blame me for that? Go ahead. It doesn’t change the fact that you can’t make your intentions clear in normal interactions, let alone romantic ones.”

“What is that supposed to mean?” Kakashi asked openly, for once actually befuddled.

“It means,” Naruto began, stopping suddenly on the branch directly in front of the one Kakashi had just jumped to.

When Kakashi stopped as well, Naruto leapt over to him, blue eyes meeting Kakashi’s uncovered one with a seriousness the older ninja rarely saw outside of battle. It made Kakashi’s breath catch involuntarily, and sparked the inexplicable urge to back up against the tree—an urge that he fought and won, but nonetheless left him a bit rattled mentally.

“It means,” Naruto continued, “that Iruka-sensei doesn’t even realize you’re trying to date him. He just thinks you’re being your usual, annoying self.”

That sardonic smirk was back on Naruto’s whiskered face, and he was stalking towards Kakashi now. Kakashi realized belatedly that the internal battle he thought he’d won had merely retreated momentarily in order to perform a sneak attack—and now the tree bark was pressing to the back of his flak jacket, and a familiar feral grin was spreading Naruto’s full lips.

“It means,” Naruto repeated, voice lower and infinitely more husky—a sound Kakashi had never heard from him before and suddenly wondered why he’d never had the desire to until now. “If you really want something, you have to really go for it.”

A split-second was all the time Kakashi had to realize that Naruto had tugged down his mask, and his hands were now gripping the bark on either side of Kakashi's head. Then Naruto’s mouth was on his, practically devouring him as a hot, hard body pressed against him.

Later, when Naruto was wearing a particularly more satisfied smirk, Kakashi had retrieved his pants from a thorn bush many feet below, and was still wondering where his underwear could have run off to—every leap from branch to branch bringing the thought to the forefront as it caused the somewhat rougher material of his pants to chafe against his bark-scratched and otherwise-abused bum—Kakashi thought perhaps Naruto had a point.

The problem was, he wasn’t exactly sure anymore what it was he was after. For the moment, though, he decided it was okay to simply enjoy the last remnants of after-glow. He wasn’t even too bothered by the fact he would need to replace his book, which had disappeared even more mysteriously than his underwear.

Later still, when Iruka passed him inside the Hokage Tower—unaccompanied for the first time in Kakashi couldn’t remember how long—and invited him to lunch with a hopeful smile, Kakashi felt the belated rush of guilt. He agreed, simply because he knew he needed to finally lay things on the line. He’d finally made a decision, and it wasn’t the one he would’ve made if he’d had to make it two weeks before.

Preferring not to run into Naruto at the moment, and hoping for a more private conversation, he steered Iruka away from Ichiraku’s and into a nearby teashop, where they got a small table in a quiet corner, away from most of the other patrons.

Their orders were taken quickly, and Kakashi didn’t want to waste any time once the waitress was gone from their table. Iruka spoke first, however.

“Something on your mind? You’re acting more peculiar than usual,” the Academy teacher commented with a hint of concern in his amused tone.

Time to confess, Kakashi decided, steeling himself for what may come. Despite being a very pleasant person normally, Iruka also had an infamous temper, after all.

“Actually, there is,” Kakashi admitted. “You see, I have something I feel I should tell you… I know you may find it shocking and sudden, but… I can’t court you anymore. I’ve decided to seriously date Naruto.”

Iruka smiled largely. “So, you two finally stopped dancing around each other! It’s about time! I swear, all the trouble I go to trying to get you two alone together only to have my plans dashed by the sheer idiocy of one or both of you… I was practically developing an ulcer f—” Iruka suddenly stopped short and blinked rapidly at Kakashi. “Did…did you say you were courting me?!” he asked, utterly aghast.

Huh, Kakashi thought to himself. It seemed Naruto really had been right, after all… Kakashi smiled beneath his mask when he realized he wasn’t as perturbed by this thought as he probably should have been. The smile grew as Iruka suddenly started lecturing him on the many ways he would be slowly and most-painfully tortured if he broke Naruto’s heart.

~*~*~*~*~
End