Hold On Tightly, Let Go Lightly

Reviews from AFF.net

 

Mort: Thanks so much for your review! I agree with you completely, I like it better when Sasuke and Naruto’s relationship is kind of built up to rather than the two just thrown into a romantic situation and act on it right away. Plus, Sasuke’s stubborn hehe XD

=====================================

Naruto slept like the dead for a good two hours before he stirred. Waking up every two or three hours was normal for him. It wasn’t safe sleeping out on the streets and he’d adapted so that the smallest noise woke him up. He didn’t know what had this time, or if it was just habit, but he did wonder how he’d gotten into bed. As he laid there in the darkness, he grew increasingly uncomfortable and fidgety, until sleep pulled him under once more.



Another hour passed before he awoke again, this time bolting up in bed from a nightmare. All he could remember was pain, so much pain, and his father’s drunken form standing over him, laughing madly. A cold sweat covered his trembling body and his heart raced in his chest. He glanced over at his backpack and then slipped out of bed, but stopped before he pulled out a needle. It felt like betraying Sasuke, somehow. He didn’t want to use in the Uchiha’s house.



Afraid he couldn’t get back to sleep; Naruto sneaked down the hall to what he assumed was Sasuke’s room. He peeked inside and saw the raven beneath his covers, looking so comfortable. Before he’d even thought about it, Naruto tip-toed into the room and approached the bed. He knew it was a stupid thing to do. It would probably get him kicked out and Sasuke would probably hate him for it, but he did it anyway.



Pulling back the covers, he slipped into Sasuke’s bed and lied down, pressing as close to the raven as he could without actually touching him. Almost immediately, he fell back asleep.



Hearing his door creak slightly as it was moved; Sasuke's eyes opened just a sliver as he watched Naruto approach his bed. At first he was going to make it known that he was awake, but decided against it as Naruto just stood there for a moment, seeming to be making a decision about something. Finally Sasuke felt his blankets being moved and felt the mattress dip as the blonde slipped into bed next to him. Almost panicking, Sasuke tried hard not to move, not wanting Naruto to know he was awake.



After the kid had settled next to him, Sasuke could tell that he had fallen asleep by the rhythm of his breathing. Slowly he turned over and just looked at the boy. He looked so... pathetic in his sleep, like he had been through hell and back... well, he looked like that when he was awake too but there was an added innocence to him when asleep.



Not really caring why or what he was thinking, Sasuke gently let his arm wrap around the slender teen in a kind of protective gesture, as he lay his head down on his pillow once more, sleep suddenly coming to him quickly.



Almost as soon as that arm wrapped around him, Naruto’s dreams became pleasant. His body melted into the embrace and the sadness etched upon his face disappeared. He slept soundly through the rest of the night and well into the morning.



When he awoke, it was to odd warmth pressed up against his front. His eyes blinked open and he stared groggily at the dark blur in front of him, until he realized it was a shirt. A shirt....



Slowly, his head tilted up until his forehead touched something warm, and he realized it was someone’s chin. And then it dawned on him. He’d slipped into Sasuke’s bed the night before, and now he was practically smushed up against his chest, with two strong arms wrapped around his body.



For a moment, Naruto panicked. If Sasuke woke up, would he freak out? Would he... hate him? Worrying his bottom lip, the blond settled down against the raven again as he tried to figure out what the hell he was supposed to do. If he tried to move and head back to the guest room, he’d probably wake Sasuke up. But if he stayed there, the Uchiha would wake up soon and probably freak out anyway.



With no winning solution, Naruto closed his eyes and eventually fell into a doze. If he was going to be freaked out at anyway, he might as well enjoy the warmth and comfort Sasuke was bringing to him right then.



It was only about ten minutes later that Sasuke shifted a bit, confused in his groggy state as to what was in his arms. He usually wasn't one to hug his pillow at night so what the hell was he holding? Finally waking up enough to remember the night before, the raven haired man stayed still as he opened his eyes and looked at the dozing boy who was now snuggled up against his chest. But instead of being annoyed like he would have normally been, he felt... warm and comfortable.



Not really wanting to disturb Naruto's sleep, knowing the blonde must be exhausted still, Sasuke stayed where he was but shifted a bit more just to let the kid know that he was awake and wasn't going to freak out on him.



Naruto tensed for a fraction of a second as he felt Sasuke move. He could tell by the raven’s breathing that he was awake and he braced himself for yelling, or to be kicked out of bed - or worse, to be beaten for overstepping his boundaries. He didn’t know the Uchiha well. He didn’t know if he had a temper or not, but he was afraid to find out and he’d been hurt for much less than that.



“S-Sorry,” he muttered timidly, his voice sounding entirely small and frightened. “I- I had a nightmare and, I... I don’t really know what happened. I just kind of ended up here...”



"S'fine... just go back to sleep." came the sleepy reply as Sasuke shifted a bit more, getting more comfortable against his pillow, his arm unconsciously pulling Naruto closer to him.



Naruto let out a shaky sigh of relief and laid his head back down, his forehead resting comfortably against Sasuke’s chest. He’d never been so comfortable in his life. Hesitantly, his arm slid up the raven’s side and wrapped around him. He’d barely slept in a week and his body was still so exhausted and weak. He fell asleep again quickly and deeply, completely passing out against Sasuke.



XX



Two days later, Sasuke padded around the kitchen, preparing some tea that he had made fresh just a few minutes before. Naruto was still staying with him, the kid being too exhausted to stay up for any amount of time passed an hour. It wasn't as if Sasuke minded really, he had a whole week off from work, deciding to use up some of his accumulated vacation time to just relax a bit.



He barely noticed Naruto was even there, the kid slept most of the time so there really was not much of a difference in his life, except for the fact that he had noticed every time he looked at Naruto, he'd get some strange feeling in his stomach, almost like anxiousness but he had no idea why he would be nervous.



Pouring two mugs of green tea, Sasuke added a bit of honey to each cup before picking one up and heading to his room, where Naruto had been sleeping for the past two days. It seemed as though the teen felt a lot more comfortable when Sasuke was around... and apparently felt more comfortable in his bed instead of the guest bed. He figured it made sense considering the lack of compassion the kid had had over the years.



Stepping through the doorway, he noticed Naruto was actually awake this time and almost smiled as he sat on the edge of the bed.



"How are you feeling? You've been sleeping off and on for almost two days now." He held out the mug of tea a bit apprehensively, not sure if Naruto even liked tea.



“Much better,” Naruto answered hoarsely, his voice thickened from all the sleep and barely speaking for two whole days. “I feel almost alive.” He chuckled as he pulled the blankets down a bit and hoisted himself up to sit back against the headboard. He rubbed at his eyes with his fists, clearing the remnants of sleep from them before he stretched out; first one arm and then the other, cracking his back with a satisfied mewl.



Looking to Sasuke and seeing the tea for him, he smiled brightly as he took the mug into his hand. Sipping at it, he sighed happily. “I haven’t had tea in a long time. I forgot how much I like it.” The honey that had been added soothed his throat and he took another sip, cradling the warm mug between his hands. “I kinda took over your bed, didn’t I? I guess you’ll have it to yourself tonight.”



Looking away for a moment, Sasuke could feel just a hint of heat to his face and hoped to god that it wasn't visible. But knowing how pale he was, he wasn't holding his breath. "It's ok... I really don't mind. I don't want you to be uncomfortable or anything."



Naruto smiled at the barely noticeable flush on Sasuke’s cheeks but didn’t say anything about it. “No, I mean... Well, I’ve been here like two days already and I’m sure you didn’t mean for me to stay that long. Now that I’ve caught up on sleep, I guess it’s time for me to go back out there...” He shifted awkwardly, hating the little ache that started up in his chest at the thought of leaving.



"Wait..." What was he doing? "I've been meaning to talk to you..." Damn it, it was already out, now he had to say it.  He had been up all night thinking about what he was going to do when it came time for Naruto to leave. In the end, the decision wasn't hard but it would ultimately be up to the blonde.



Naruto’s head snapped up and his eyes focused on Sasuke, his brows furrowing lightly. His stomach fluttered with hope for a moment, but he quickly squashed it. There was no point in getting his hopes up; his entire life had been disappointment.



“Talk to me about what?” he asked cautiously.



"Well I figured... since you have no where to go and I have plenty of room here... that maybe you could stay here... if you want." His words were quiet and almost couldn't be heard. He couldn't believe he was doing this but it just seemed like the right thing to do. He wasn't about to let Naruto go back out there to live on the streets, selling himself for his next fix or meal.



Naruto’s hands tightened around the mug, so tightly that his knuckles turned white. He just stared at Sasuke for a moment before speaking just as quietly. “You’re... asking me to live with you,” he said slowly, those butterflies coming back in full force. “I... Honestly, I would love to. I mean, it would fix everything...I wouldn’t have to worry about anything anymore, but... I would pretty much be using you. I don’t have any way to repay you. I don’t have an education so there’s no way I could get a job, and... I would feel so bad for mooching off you.” He stared down at his lap and absently sipped at his tea.



Sasuke wasn't surprised at Naruto's answer. He knew the kid didn't like handouts but honestly, how could he even consider passing the opportunity up? Luckily, he was the type of person who thought ahead.



"You can get your GED... I mean... you haven't been out of school for that long and if you do get a job. I could always charge you rent if you really wanted me too. I mean, I don't care either way, I don't really need you to pay me." He looked anywhere but at Naruto, it was a bit awkward to say the least, it was almost as if he was begging Naruto to stay. Well, in a way, he sort of was.



Naruto opened his mouth to refute, to tell Sasuke that there was no way he could stay. Not just because he would be mooching off him, but rather, depending on another person scared him. He’d depended on his father, and where had that gotten him?



“Okay,” he found himself whispering, despite the war going on with his head and heart. “I guess... Yeah, I’ll stay...”



Sasuke's stomach did a small flip at the prospect of Naruto staying. He was glad the kid had agreed but at the same time, he was a bit scared at these feelings that were starting to surface. He hadn't even known the blonde for that long, not to mention he was only a teenager... Maybe it wasn't what he thought. Yeah, it was probably just relief that he wouldn't be suffering anymore. Of course deep down the raven knew he was just lying to himself. But for now, he was content to live in denial.



"Good... Well... now that we've gotten that out of the way, I want to go over a couple things." His look became a bit more firm but he remained seated. "No more drugs... I know it helps but, there are other ways to deal with your pain. Trust me, I know."



Naruto frowned, but nodded slowly. “Okay, but you know I’m going to go through withdrawals, right?” Over the past two days, the blond had had to pull himself out of bed long enough to shoot up, just to keep them at bay. The thought of going through them was frightening. “I’ll, um... I’ll probably go a little crazy, and I’m going to get really fucking sick... but it’s your house and your rules, I guess.” He’d never tried to quit before and become sober. He didn’t even know if he could do it. “I’ll... do my best.”



Sasuke knew it would be hard, but he couldn't take Naruto to a rehab center. He knew that they would need a medical history and possibly information that Naruto probably wouldn't want to give. So it was best to just try and help Naruto through it. Once the initial detox was over, Sasuke would help the blonde get into some kind of help program to stay off the stuff for good.



"I know... but I can handle it. I've had to do it before..." It wasn't something he liked to remember but he was proud to know that he had saved his friend’s life.



“You have?” Naruto asked, surprise written all over his face. He wanted to ask more, but didn’t want to pry. From the first day he’d met Sasuke, he’d known the man was very private. Hell, he still didn’t know anything about the guy other than his full name - which he’d had to get from the news, and the fact that he was a lawyer. He didn’t even know how old the Uchiha was. “Okay then... what else did you want to go over?”



Sasuke knew Naruto was curious about him but there would be plenty of time for that later. He just had to get his thoughts out in the open.



"I don't want you to be afraid to ask me for things. I really don't mind doing something or getting you something if it means you're comfortable. I mean, that's the point of you staying with me. Also I’m going to try to be more open with you so ... If you want to know anything about me, just ask." He offered a small smile, trying to open himself up a bit. He wanted this arrangement to work out, more than he previously thought he did.



Naruto smiled as well, bringing his mug up to take another sip. “There’re lots of things I want to ask you,” he chuckled. “Like, how old you are, for one. But it goes both ways. I’ll tell you just about anything... Except my last name. Maybe in the future, but for now, I just can’t.” He shrugged and settled in to the bed again, before another thought occurred to him. “I guess I’ll need a key or something. I’ll want to be able to go out, since I’m used to being out and doing my own thing. I’m not sure I could stand staying inside all the time.”



Sasuke nodded in answer, figuring as much. He wasn't about to lock Naruto up in his condo and not let the kid go out. Naruto wanted to stay so there was no reason why he would just take off.



"That's fine... and as for how old I am. I'm 26." Standing from the bed, he decided to sit in a cushioned armchair he had set up in a corner for when he was reading. It was quite comfortable and he figured he'd be there for a while, both getting to know each other.



“Wow, you got a lot going for you for only being 26,” Naruto breathed, completely impressed. “You’re so... together. I bet you were at the top of all your classes and I’m sure you worked hard to get where you are.” Frowning, the blond took a big gulp from his drink, as it was starting to cool off. Feeling a little warm, he pulled the blanket off him and stretched again, his shirt - or, rather Sasuke’s - riding up to show off his slim stomach.  “I hope I can have that someday. The only thing I really have going for me is my art, and I don’t even think that will get me anywhere.”



"You like art? What kind are you interested in?" Well it looked like the two did have something in common after all. Sasuke had done a bit of painting and charcoal work in his spare time, even taking a couple classes at a local community college after he had graduated with his Master’s degree.



“I, um... I draw,” Naruto admitted sheepishly. “With the money I get, I buy notebooks and pencils... It’s the only thing I really had to do out there and I love it...” Sliding off the bed, he moved over to his backpack and bent over to dig through it for a second. He’d never shown anyone his art before, except his father, who had then yelled at him for being an ‘artsy fag’ and then had ripped them all up. But he knew, somehow, that Sasuke wouldn’t make fun of him. “Here,” he said, handing over one of his notebooks.



Opening the spiral notebook, Sasuke flipped through the pages. They were mostly drawings of whatever Naruto had been looking at around him; people, buildings, different aspects of architecture...



"These are really good." Sasuke had to admit that for someone with just raw talent, they were very nicely done. If Naruto was given the opportunity to further his talents with some classes in technique, he'd be amazing.



“You think?” Naruto asked, shooting the raven a lop-sided grin. “Nah, they’re just scribbles. It’s just a... a hobby of sorts. It’s not like I could really do anything with it.” He shrugged as he moved back to Sasuke and grabbed his notebook. He was going to go back to the bed, but he was honestly sick of being in it. Instead, he flopped onto the floor by Sasuke’s feet and leaned back beside his legs. “I’ve never shown anyone, you know. It’s kind of... I don’t know, private, I guess.”



Looking down at the blonde now on the floor, Sasuke had to wonder why he chose there of all places to sit. It wasn't as if there weren't more chairs around his room.



"That's not true; you can do a lot with it. That is if you got some technical training to learn a bit more about it. I mean... is it something you really love?" As he spoke he couldn't help but notice how bright Naruto's hair seemed to look when clean. It really was amazing how much a shower could make a difference.



“Yeah. I really do love it,” Naruto smiled. “I’ve thought about going to school for it, but before now it was impossible. It might still be, I don’t know.” His brows creased and his body unconsciously leaned to the side, resting against Sasuke’s legs. “I guess I should start thinking about that, huh? Schooling I mean... I never wanted to drop out. I mean, I hated school while I was there, but I know I need it now. I’m just not sure I’ll be able to get my GED because I’m so behind...” He worried his bottom lip and stared down at the floor. “Unless I had help...”



Of course Sasuke had thought of school. Since the blonde was around sixteen or so, he would be equivalent to that of a junior in high school. There were numerous alternatives to enrolling Naruto in high school, if they would even take him.



"When did you drop out?" he asked quietly, not sure if it was a touchy subject for the teen.



Naruto frowned softly and absently toyed with the hem of Sasuke’s pants. He tugged gently and twisted the material between his fingers. “I dropped out half-way through my freshman year. Honestly, I barely made it that far. Most days I couldn’t even go to school, because... Well, I’m sure you can figure that out.”



It was hard to hear but Sasuke knew it was important to know. It didn't help that he knew exactly why Naruto couldn't go to school. Seeing as how Naruto was starting to feel a bit uncomfortable, Sasuke decided to end the questions for now.



"Why don't we go get some clothes for you...? I mean, since mine don't fit..." He knew it would take some getting used to, having Naruto around, but he knew he had made the right decision to ask the blonde to stay. The first weeks and maybe even into the first month would probably be very hard for the both of them but Sasuke had gotten himself into this and he knew he wasn't going to back out for anything.



“New clothes?” Naruto’s lips twitched into a little grin as he tilted his head back so he looked at Sasuke upside-down. “I haven’t had new clothes in forever!” He wasn’t too pleased with the fact that Sasuke would have to pay for them... but he’d already decided that as soon as he was able to, he was going to pay the Uchiha back for everything. “Sure, let’s go! Um... I just need more clothes to wear out.” He tugged at the sleep pants he wore. “I can’t wear these out.”



Nodding a bit stiffly, Sasuke got out of his chair and headed over to his dresser, opening a drawer and looking through its contents, hoping to find some pants that were too small for him. He usually didn't keep pants that he had grown out of but he knew he had something that would work.



After a few more seconds, Sasuke pulled out a pair of black slacks that he had gotten as a present for his birthday one year. They were indeed too small for him which was a bit surprising considering they were from his own mother.



"These should fit. As for the shirt, just wear it and I'll let you borrow a coat, it's supposed to be cold today." he said, handing the neatly folded pair of pants over to the blonde.



“Thanks,” Naruto smiled, taking the pants in hand. He turned his back to Sasuke and hooked his thumbs into the waistband of the sleep pants and tugged them down. He quickly slipped into the garments he’d been given. They were small and very tight; they hugged his body and his ass - even he knew he looked good in them. He bent over to fish out some socks, and a little part of him wished the Uchiha would look at him. But, he knew Sasuke didn’t think of him that way; he was just some little homeless brat with a fucked up body that nobody wanted, except for a quick fuck.



Sasuke quickly turned when he saw Naruto about to undress right there in the room. He would have said something but he knew how sensitive Naruto was around him so he refrained from commenting. He did notice however how well the pants fit the teen and he had to admit that they looked good on him... Wait, what was he thinking?



Tugging his socks on, Naruto straightened and grabbed his backpack, slinging it over his shoulder. He didn’t go anywhere without it.



“I’m ready,” he announced, before padding out of the bedroom and to the door. He slid into his worn sneakers and took the coat Sasuke handed to him. He leaned up against the wall to wait for Sasuke, feeling oddly excited at the prospect of going shopping with him.



After he had finished his routine preparations before going out, Sasuke headed to the door and slipped on his own shoes. Since it was so cold, he chose to wear a black scarf as well as a charcoal grey coat over his white button down shirt and black slacks. The raven didn't believe in jeans, at least for his own preference, and had maybe worn them once in his entire life. He believed in looking presentable at all times to make a good impression, even to those you don't know.



"Let's go." he said, putting his keys, wallet, and phone in the pockets of his coat before opening the door and letting Naruto step out first.

TBC