Of Curry, Fevers, and Kits

Trying to get Naruto to calm down had been much harder than expected after such news, and Tsunade had expected it to be quite hard to begin with. And things had only gotten much worse when three certain disobedient brats burst into the room to see what the commotion was about.

Naruto had gone stock still for a moment, staring at first Sasuke, then Gaara, then Sai, a strange emotion flickering across his face, then his face had colored crimson, he snarled and all hell broke loose! Naruto had fought more like a cornered beast than a shinobi, kicking, punching, swiping with strangely clawed hands, actually biting Sasuke’s arm hard enough to bleed, though it would have been his throat if the Uchiha hadn’t reacted as quickly as he had.

In the end Tsunade, with the help of the three boys as a distraction, had to force feed Naruto a powerful sleepy draught, counting on her legendary strength just to be able to hold down the raging blond long enough to make him swallow the draught. The dosage was strong enough to knock out a whale for at least an hour… and knowing Naruto’s ability to quickly burn through healing and medicine’s, Tsunade was prepared to admit that she probably had the same amount of time.

She’d have to work fast. With this new development there were many more tests that she’d have to run, quite a few of them unfortunately intrusive. She hoped Naruto would forgive her. But it was for his own good after all. She had thought a man going into rut was strange, this had to be at least ten times crazier. She would help the boy she saw as her own son, grandson (though she wouldn’t admit to that), every step of the way.

Calling for nurses and other medinins they had moved back to the labs, and when the three brats, all with various degrees of batters, bruises and wounds, had moved to follow she had given then a bone searing look and they all sat down on chairs in the room or on the bed itself like well trained puppies. She inwardly smirked, though on the outside she was all business. “Stay here. I will send nurses to tend to your injuries. Can’t say you didn’t deserve them though.” She added the last as an afterthought. “Leave Naruto in my care for now. You’ve all done enough.”

She didn’t see the dejected and guilty faces she left behind. She really didn’t have the time to deal with their moral consciences right now. She’d get back to them later. Naruto would have to face them sooner or later. One of them was the father of his child.

X-rays, ultrasounds, checking chakra pathways and networks, and far too many other tests that Tsunade would rather not care to remember. All done as quickly as possible, the slug princess was determined to have Naruto back in his room before the blond came to. And what the hime wanted she always got.

Naruto safely back in his room, Sasuke, Sai, and Gaara out of the room until the hokage thought that her successor would be ready to see them ago, Tsunade sat herself down and looked at the small stack of tests results that she had to read through. Ah well, a bit of light reading until Naruto awoke then? It sounded like a marvelous plan to her!

~

When the world has sunken into darkness around him Naruto found himself right back in the familiar empty, nearly dark chamber in his inner conscious, the large wooden bars held together by a seal across from him. He had raged in there for a while as well until he collapsed against the bars in an exhausted heap. He was mad at Kyuubi as well, because all this had to be his doing!

The bastard fox as usual didn’t seem to pay any mind to his temper tantrums, though this time it even seemed like he was refusing to acknowledge Naruto’s presence at all, turn away from him and further away than he usually was. He was usually right behind the bars. Naruto growled to be snubbed this way by the entity taking up space in is body.

“Oi! Stupid fox! Don’t just ignore me! Listen to me when I’m talking to you! Tell me what you did to me now!”

There was a low rumbling sound of annoyance and from a distance he could see one red eye looking at him, narrowed dangerously, then looked away again. “Sorry, I usually don’t listen to the ranting of bitches.”

Naruto sputtered indignantly. “WHAT DID YOU CALL ME?!”

Red eyes were looking at him again, Kyuubi facing towards him but still not coming back. The demon fox chuckled a deep, throaty, rumbling laugh, “It’s what you are now, isn’t it? A bitch.”

Naruto was half ready to rip off the seal just to get to the fox and kick his ass. Fortunately he wasn’t that far gone yet. “That’s because you did this to me, you fucking bastard!”

That was answered by another rumbling chuckle, “I did, didn’t I? But if I had known what a whiny bitch you’d turn to I might have reconsidered doing it.”

“YOU BASTARD!! What did you do to me?!”

The fox snorted softly, the sound coming off as a half growl. “I thought that was obvious. I turned you into a bitch.”

Naruto nearly tore out his own hair, “Stop saying that! I’m not a bitch! I’m still a man! Male, dammit!”

The massive form seemed to shrug. “It would have been too much trouble if I had changed your anatomy completely. And excruciatingly painful for you, too. You should feel lucky that I decided not to go that far.”

Naruto paled, feeling a wave of vertigo hit him, slumping back against the bars again. That bastard fox would have really turned him into a real woman! He had no doubt about that in is mind. “You… you’re insane.”

“Hn,” the fox replied and turned away again. “Now stop bothering me, I’m busy.”

Naruto frowned. “Busy? What the hell can you be busy with in here?”

An irritated growl was his answer. “Bratty bitch, I told you not to bother me.”

“And I told you to stop calling me a bitch!” Naruto shouted back. “Stupid fox!”

A long silence fell over them, giving Naruto a long time to think things over. He was… he was pregnant… There was a life growing within him. His hand went to his stomach, cupping over it, feeling a mixture of dread, fear, and a tiny dash of warmth. He really was pregnant… He was going to have a baby... and he knew that… T-that either Gaara, Sai, or Sasuke was the father. He blushed crimson.

He was slowly starting to remember the previous day. Nothing too detailed, just flashes of images. His hand went over his mouth with a soft groan, lifting higher to push his hand through his hair. Gods, had he really acted that way? Had he really begged all three of them to… t-to… a-and he had… he had played with himself down there when he had been alone. He felt a thrum go through him when he thought about being along, it was… it was a lot like the feeling he got when the three of them had burst into his hospital room earlier. It made his heart ache painfully.

He whimpered, feeling that pain now, curling onto his side, his back still pressed against the large bars. “What’s wrong with me…?”

He was surprised when the demon fox answered him. “Where to start, really?”

Naruto growled, “Shut up! Why… why does my heart feel like it’s broken ever since I saw Sasuke, Sai and Gaara? I saw them and it hurt so much… Why? I don’t understand.”

There was a push of hot air as the demon fox sighed heavily. “Stupid, meddling brats, getting in my way.” Another gust of hot air as he sighed again. “Don’t worry yourself so much, pup. What you feel come along with the changes in your body, the heat you just went through.”

Naruto turned his head enough to look back into distant red eyes over his shoulders. “What do you mean?”

Another sigh, though this one was a bit irritated. Really, the child could be so dimwitted. Of course, the fact that Naruto was not a beast and had never gone through heat before didn’t seem like important enough factors as to why he would feel confused about how he felt. “What do you remember of what came to pass the day before?”

Naruto’s cheeks colored deeply again, dropping his gaze. He stuggled valiantly to find his voice, “I-it’s still really fuzzy, but… I… I remember that at different points in the day I… w-with them… I…”

“You let them mount you,” Kyuubi finished for him.

Naruto blushed crimson from the tip of his ears to his shoulders, about to protest, then let it slide out as a deep sigh and nodded.

“Right. Fact aside that it makes you a slutty bitch,” Naruto did start to protest at that, but the fox was having none of it, continuing, “This was your first heat, so you can’t really hold yourself accountable for your loss of control. It was your first heat. And you’ve never previously been claimed, so your instinctive mind was ripe for the picking. I had always suspected you’d be a popular bitch, but leave it to humans to only do things half way.” The massive form shrugged again.

“… That doesn’t make any sort of sense, you stupid fox! Speak clearly!”

Kyuubi growled his annoyance, but he owed the brat this much for turning his world upside down without warning. Normally he wouldn’t care, but Naruto was an important vessel now. It wouldn’t do to let him fall into confusion and despair. “Think clearly, did any of them stay with you throughout the whole of your heat?”

Naruto felt his heart give another thrum at that, trying hard to recall all of it. “N-no… t-they… they all left before it was over…” His heart clenched painfully thinking about it, tears just dotting the corners of his eyes. They had all abandoned him

The demon fox nodded, noticing the pain in those blue eyes. Feeling a strange swell of sympathy a large, warm, furry and fluffy tail ‘whump’d out from beyond the bars, covering the blond with it’s warmth. Naruto instinctively wrapped his arms around the furry appendage and held onto it like a security blanket. Kyuubi let him, though he made a small snuffling sound of annoyance.

“It seems that you’re starting to understand. You have bonds of friendship with each of those three boys, and all three of them stepped forward and forged the bond deeper with you while you were in heat. But none of them stayed long enough to forge the final link to solidify that bond. The end result is that that uncompleted bonds with each of them is causing pain and confusion in your heart. Until one of them steps forward to complete their bond, making you their mate, you will continue to feel this pain and confusion.”

Naruto nodded in understanding, though he really didn’t understand all of it. He understood the pain, and the talk of bonds, since the bonds he had with his friends had always been important to him. The rest… was a bit confusing, though it made his heart skip a beat. “What should I do?”

The fox snorted. “What should you do? You should make those idiots work for the honor of being your mate. They hurt you and now they’ll have to work twice as hard to make up for it.”

The blonde’s eyes widened in surprise, flushing a warm pink, “I… I…”

“Just don’t think about it, kit. Just let them do all the work and do what your heart tells you to do.”

Naruto nodded firmly this time. That he knew he could do.

“Good… now stop being a troublesome bitch. I’m busy.”

“Don’t call me that!”

So much for having a surprisingly nice talk with the demon fox.

~

It was about half an hour later than the blond woman had calculated, but groggy blue eyes slowly fluttered open. She was right there when it happened, stroking blue bangs out of his face in a very maternal manner. “Welcome back to the world of the living, Naruto. Feeling any calmer?”

Naruto looked up at the blond woman, nodded mutely, then looked slowly around the room, not spotting anyone else. He felt his heart tighten in pain again. They weren’t there. “W-where… S-sasuke, Gaara… Sai..?” He tried to speak clearly, but his throat felt dry and his mind was still muddled.

Tsunade sighed, “They’re just outside the room. If you want to see them I will let them in, but I have to talk to you first, alright?” She was surprised with how complacent the blond was when all he did was nod mutely. The sleeping draught had done him more good than she had thought. It was like he had time to think thing through while he was sleeping. “Good, I’ll try to make this as quick as possible. Now Naruto, tell me everything that happened since you first notice something odd.”

Naruto sighed heavily and started to explain everything. The strange craving for curry he had gotten, the start of the dizziness and the pain in his stomach. With a blush he told her aobut the extremely horrible case of diarrhea he had gotten, and how his stomach had started to hurt worse afterwards, like a burning feeling deep in his body. Then… then the next thing he could clearly remember was waking up here. He was not about to tell the old woman about the memories of being in heat and the dozens upon dozens of times he had had sex in a single day.

Tsunade nodded in understanding, taking down notes. “Well that better helps explain and confirm a few things.”

“I-it does…?” Naruto looked up in surprise, getting past his humiliation a little.

“Yes, do you want me to explain it to you now? Or I can explain it to you after letting the others in here.”

Naruto blushed furiously, taking a few moments to think it over, then sighed. “I… I want to see them. They’re a part of this, too.”

Tsunade nodded, inwardly sighing. “Very well.” She got up from her seat and opened the door to the room. “You three can come in now.”

Sasuke and Gaara tried to come in first at the same time, getting shoulder locked in the door way and glaring death at each other to make the other back out so they could get in. Sai rolled his eyes behind them and shoved them both in hard, making the two usually cool and aloof ninjas stumble a step before both turning the forces of their glares on the artist anbu. Sai just sighed heavily again and walked past them, taking a seat by Naruto’s bed. “Are you feeling better, Naruto-kun?”

How dare that little prick try to act all cool with Naruto! That was the thought that ran through both Sasuke and Gaara’s minds. The moved to either side of the bed, looking down at the blond with worry. Gaara lightly reach out to touch his arm, as Sasuke did the same to brush his fingers through his hair. Naruto flinched away from both of them, closing his eyes tightly. Both shinobi looked shocked and hurt at the blonde’s reactions, then mutely drew their touches away, standing stoically on either side. Sai’s brows furrowed a little with worry “Naruto?”

Naruto nodded mutely, but wasn’t looking at any of them, staring intently at his lap, his hands clenching into the sheets. He was feeling that heart wrenching pain again.

Tsunade noticed the tension and wondered why Naruto had asked her to bring them in. She cleared her throat when Naruto didn’t answer Sai. “Better is all in the eye of the beholder, really. Naruto, this is your news, do you want to tell them?”

Naruto, eyes still clenched tightly shut, shook his head furiously, face burning crimson. Tsunade couldn’t blame him.

“Very well, boys pay close attention because I won’t be repeating myself to anyone other than Naruto. Understood?” Three heads nodded in unison. “Good. Don’t interrupt me until I’m done. As you are all well aware Naruto was sick recently. Well rather you were told he was in rut.” Another nod of three heads. “It all started the day before last, and while Naruto thinks it started in the afternoon, it probably started in the earlier than that, probably as earlier as the night before or maybe even before then.

“Anyways, it all started with minor chemical changes within his body. It probably caused very subtle changes that one would more than likely overlook, like a sudden change in diet habits, or a strange craving, for example.” Sasuke, Gaara, and Sai were still lost at this point, but Naruto nodded in understanding.

“These minor changes kept going until the body was prepped for the major changes that it was going to go through.”

“What changes are you talking about?” Sai asked and was answered by a raised hand.

“I said don’t interrupt me.” Tsunade chastised, Sai pursing his lips then nodding, she went on. “These changes caused the appearance of illness in Naruto; Fever, dizziness, stomach ache, cramps, fatigue. The truth of it is it was all the body’s guise of what the real going ons were. The cramps and ‘stomach ache’ were likely caused by… well there’s no point in pussy-footing around the subject. They were more than likely caused by the newly formed ovaries and uterus forming, attaching itself to a fissure the body created by…” She realized that Naruto was staring at her blankly and the other three were staring at her incredulously. She decided to skip ahead before one of them decided to explode into disbelieving tirade.

“Yes well… Naruto, even before when you told me of your… a-hem… diarrhea problem right before the stomach pains got worse, right?” All Naruto could do was blush furiously and nod meekly. “Well even that was your body’s preparations. Your body caused a purge of your digestive system in order to create a clean and sterile area for what was to come next. All perfectly normal… or at least as normal as this can get. After that came the release of hormones and pheromones, then…”

“Wait a damn second!” Sasuke spoke, having had enough of the strange talk. “All I can gather from this is that you’re saying Naruto developed a woman’s reproductive system in his body in a little over a day. Are you mad?!”

Tsunade glared at the Uchiha, but he met her gaze evenly. He wasn’t backing down to this insanity. She answered in a clipped voice. “Yes. That’s what I’m saying. What we thought was a rut was actually Naruto going into heat.”

“You really are crazy! That’s impossible,” the former avenger worked to keep is voice even.

“It isn’t impossible,” came Naruto’s meek voice. “I’m pregnant.”

If anything could send a shock through the Uchiha enough to make him stagger back without a physical blow it was that. Naruto wasn’t a good liar… if he could say it with such a serious and solemn face… It just had to be true, didn’t it? “W-what..?”

Tears pricked the corners of Naruto’s eyes, clenching the bedsheets tightly in his fists. “I said ‘I’m Pregnant!’ you stupid bastard!”

That made all three of the other teens recoil. Pregnant… Naruto… pregnant..? In unison, that seemed to be a quickly forming habit, they all looked to Tsunade to confirm the crazy statement. All she could do was nod. “Even at this point it would normally be impossible to tell 100% whether or not a wo-… if someone could be pregnant, but that Naruto’s test results even came back that way. We tried to get a closer look through an ultrasound. What we found was… bizarre. And mapping Naruto’s chackra networks confirmed it. There is a high concentration of chakra enveloping Naruto’s… womb. One can only assume it’s to defend the new life from being rejected from the body as viruses. What’s worrisome is that the chakra protecting the womb and keeping us from getting any sort of reading belongs to the nine-tailed demon fox.”

Naruto felt his heart slam against his ribcage. Kyuubi’s chakra was surrounding his baby. But… now that he thought about it the fox had told him before that he was busy. Was that what he was doing? It made sense. Why would he go through all the trouble of doing this if all his efforts would be wasted by his body’s natural defenses? His hand cupped gently over the seal on his stomach. Kyuubi…and his baby…

“So who is the father?” Sai asked as blunt as ever.

Naruto flinched, and seemed to curl into himself. The others simply glared at the pale anbu. “What? It has to be one of us, right? Which one of us is it? Do you know Naruto?”

The blond just shivered lightly and shook his head. Tsunade sighed. “It’s too soon to determine paternity and I wouldn’t be the least bit surprised if we couldn’t find out until the actual birth.”

The word ‘birth’ sent another flinch through the blond. Oh god! How was he going to give birth to a baby?!

Gaara had looked thoughtful the entire time, then stepped forward, gently placing his hand on Naruto’s shoulder despite the flinch. “I’ll take responsibility as the child’s father.”

Naruto looked up at the red head in shock, his heart skipping a beat.

“The hell you will! That baby could be mine just as easily as it could be yours!” Sasuke snarled, pulling Naruto away from the kazekage and into his arms. Naruto could only squeak, looking up between the two, noticing that they really were bearing their teeth at one another.

He nearly jumped when he felt a hand on his thigh, breath catching at the honest expression of Sai’s face. “They baby could be mine, too. If it is I want to be a part of it’s life. If you’ll let me, Naruto… I want to be a part of your life, too.” The blond’s heart fluttered.

Sasuke turned his fiery glare to the pale anbu, “Naruto is mine!”

“I came to him first. He’s mine!” Gaara snarled, pulling Naruto back into his arms.

“I think that’s for Naruto to decide. He can choose to be mine.” Sai nodded with a soft smile.

Naruto felt his heart clench painfully again then pushed then all away. “Stoppit! You stupid bastards! I don’t belong to any of you! None of you stayed!”

The room fell to silence; even Tsunade was shocked by the outburst.

Naruto couldn’t hold back his tears anymore. “None of you stayed with me throughout the whole ordeal… Y-you all left me when I needed you all most… None of you have the right to say I’m yours! So go fuck yourselves!”

“N-naruto” Gaara started but the blond was having none of it.

“If you really wanted me so damn badly you should have stayed until I was out of heat! You all used me like a slut and then you left me!”

Three shinobi flinched, realizing it was true. Naruto had told each of them that he needed them and they had run off when it was convenient for them.

The blond was drained now. He was tired, he was going through so many emotions at once, and these new… instincts were driving him batty. “Just leave! Just leave me alone!” None of them made a budge, all of them shifting in place guiltily. “I said GET OUT!!” the blond screeched and started to throw whatever was close at hand to him, his pillow, a cup of water on the side table, a vase, the actual side table, the chairs.

In the end he got his wish, only Tsunade staying by his side. She soothingly stroked his hair even in the chaos of what was left of the room. “Naruto… I know this will be a hard time for you. But I will stay by your side every step of the way. You won’t face this alone.” She wrapped her arms around the still shaking blond, relieved when the embrace was returned.

“T-thank you… g-granny…” Naruto was soothed that at least Tsunade would help him through it. But he still felt like he was facing this alone.

As if she was reading his mind the buxom blond patted him on the head. “Give them some time. They’ll be back soon enough to try to win your heart, Naruto. They really would be fools to not try.”

A pink flush dusted the blond shinobi’s cheeks. “You really think so?” He was worried that he had permanently scared them away with his tantrum.

The godaime smirked almost evilly. “I know so. I have no doubt in my mind that even as we speak they’re all plotting ways to get back on your good side.” And oh how right she was.

~
To be continued

G'dammit! Where's the sex you hor?!

I know, I know...

Don't mind the medical BS... it's nothing but BS... XD;