Can you see my Heart?

A sunny blond haired youth looked around anxiously for his companion, but the brunette was no where to be found. The people milling around the ballroom blocked his vision, and he sighed letting out an exhausted breath. It had been almost an hour and still no sign of Sasuke.

Since his tearful goodbye to his parents, friends and family more than five months ago, the last joyous thing that he could remember in his life was the going away party they had held for him that night in Konoha. That same night his lover had presented to him a simple promise ring that forever and always he would be his. Too bad he hadn’t added in happily ever after.

Naruto paused in his musings as he looked into the wall length mirror, one of many around the room. It was flanked by rich velvet curtains to add to the décor, and such a simple thing felt too rich for even him.

His face was paler than usual and the first telltale sign of insomnia was starting to show. He barely ate and had no hobbies, most of his worry dedicated to Sasuke than to himself. The raven had been his usual carefree persona when they’d first arrived in New York, taking Naruto on countless trips and marking him into the mattress when night came.

They continued to express their love unequivocally, but all that was waning very quickly. Naruto never thought he could get tired of being in a place where he was provided for, worked happily and got to spend time with the one he loved but that was the thing.

He was tired.

Tired of the late nights Sasuke spent working in the company.

Tired of spending most of those nights alone.

Tired of when Sasuke came home after office meetings, he would be drunk, when the bastard knew that he couldn’t hold his liquor.


It angered him. Basically because Sasuke would come home and want to make love to him and Naruto would allow him to. He would allow him because he loved him, because he knew the extreme strain the father was putting on the son. He knew that those nights when he would lie on that mattress and felt no pleasure from the experience, his face turned away from the alcohol and smoke on Sasuke’s breath and clothes. That he couldn’t not kiss him even if he wanted to. He would do anything for the man above him, because he loved him. Even if it meant he was starting to be worth less than the usual one night stand. Loved him alone.

Staring into that mirror, he wasn’t so sure of that anymore.

The suit he wore hung on his shrinking frame; he was hollow, inside and out.

Regardless of the haughty laughter that echoed around him and the chinking of glasses with merriment, he just wanted to go home. Not to that apartment, but home to his real family.

Even so, he still had to go and collect his things and ignore if Sasuke was there or not. He would not fight or even talk to him. It was over. It had been over for quite a while and Naruto had been too much of an idiot to see what had been blatantly staring him in the face.


Collecting his coat from the front desk, he made his way out into the frigid weather, snow falling softly all around him. He tugged his scarf tighter around his neck and listened only to the crunch of his shoes on the pavement. That December was fun for everyone but him; his cheeks no longer warm from the blush of love that stained them. Should I even try to fix anything? To understand what was happening between us? Again?

He’d tried all that already and it’d never worked. It just led to more fighting and hurtful words. Guilt, animosity and bitterness. It was amazing that someone he knew for such a long time to change into a person he didn’t recognize.

The cab ride to their building was short, since the function hadn’t been that far away. Didn’t mean he was going to walk in that biting cold.

As he took the elevator, wanting to get things over with quickly, he remembered a James Blunt song, his blue eyes downcast as he waited to arrive at his floor.


Did I disappoint you? Or let you down?
Should I be feeling guilty? Or let the judges frown?


He slowly slid his card in, the light turning green and him coming face to face with some guy being fucked into the mattress by Sasuke. Whose promise ring he currently wore.


I saw the end before it began, ‘cause I saw you and I
And I knew I had won.


There was only unmarked pleasure drawn across his boyfriend face. Not even aware that his partner was now staring open mouth at him. He probably detected a presence because he began to speed up, gaining traction to his climax.


So I took what’s mine, but tunnel ride. Took your soul out into the night.
It may be over, but I won’t stop there. I am here for you, if you’d only care.


Naruto felt his blood become hot as Sasuke spurted his seed into that guy on the bed. His seed, as if it was something to be spread around like coupons. He dove into the room and tackled Sasuke unto the floor, the brunette confused as to why the sudden interruption as he slipped out. He broke out of that confusion though when Naruto aimed a sharp one right at his face. Sasuke felt his eye start to throb painfully, his jaw feeling as if it’d been broken.

“You fucking son-of a bitch!” the blond spat as he sat of his hips, never halting his blows.

Sasuke felt his face becoming bloodier by the minute, everything was swelling fast and felt something wet fall on him. Definitely not blood.


Naruto was crying, a heavy anger as he plummeted what remained of his boyfriend into the ground. The raven could not get him to let up, his brain finally starting to clear as to what was going on.

“How could you? How could you dare bring that slut into out home? Fuck him in our bed?”
Naruto didn’t wait for an answer. He was suddenly pulled off by the other guy who held him back under his arms.

“Let me go! Let me give that fucking asshole what he deserves!” Naruto strained forward, his muscles bunching in anger.

Sasuke sat up from his place on the floor and tentatively touched his face and wiped his bloody nose.

“Let me go.” Naruto bit out again, but softer this time in resignation to the guy behind him. “I’m done with all of this. Done fighting. Done with you.” He pointedly directed his eyes to Sasuke, the raven flinching at the glare. He took a second to realize what his boyfriend was saying but Naruto was already out the door.


You touched my heart, touched my soul. Changed my life and all my goals.
Love was blind and that I knew. I’m addicted to you.


Naruto was out of the three story building by the time Sasuke caught up with him. He had thrown on a pair of pants and his shirt hurriedly before scampering downstairs.

“Naruto wait!” Sasuke shouted to him over the late traffic. He stood by the lobby doors and Naruto on the pavement. “What you saw just now doesn’t matter!” Sasuke’s breath came in sharp gasps as he tried to regain it.

Naruto shivered. “Don’t you dare tell me that you bastard! Don’t you say that fucking someone else was just a fling! That you weren’t thinking of coming back and sticking your dick inside me again and giving me something! Don’t you fucking tell me that you love me Sasuke, because if you do, I swear to God I will kill you!!” He pulled his coat tighter around himself.


Sasuke throat was closed. His windpipe was not working properly. The alveoli in his lungs were dying. What was he going to say to make this right? He didn’t even know what had been happening in there. Didn’t even know Naruto had been standing there, observing his-disgustingly grotesque- act of idiocy.

He looked up at the man that he’d loved for so long and saw him crying again. Those blue eyes that he loved echoing the pain that he had caused, when he said that he’d never hurt him, that this would never take place when they’d moved to New York but it had.


Goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend.
You had been the one; you had been the one for me.


It was over.


“Fuck you Sasuke.” He stepped off the pavement and into the street since the light had turned red for crossing.


Goodbye my lover.


Sasuke’s eyebrows rose as he saw cars started to move.

“Stop crossing you moron!” Sasuke shouted and sprinted for the pavement.


Goodbye my friend.


Naruto was already in the middle of the street when he turned around, “What are you-”

It was then the bus hit him, his body flying a few feet and twisting in the air before landing on the cold cement. That cold cement decorated with a snow that was quickly dotting red.


You had been the one.


The vehicles screeched to a halt as Sasuke ran across the road, his heart pumping erratically.

He knelt, gathered up that blond head that was now red and crushed him to his chest, Naruto not responding, his mouth filling with blood.

Sasuke began rocking him back and forth, hoping that those eyes would open, but they didn’t and he started to cry his first tears in a long time.

“Naruto!! Baby….No ...No… no… no….Please wake up!! Please!”


You had been the one for me.


There were screams around him and shouts by people to call an ambulance but he blocked them out, adamant about waking up the body that was slowly getting cold in his arms.

When they came to take Naruto away from him, he couldn’t, just couldn’t let them take him. He just knelt in the snow, crying his heart out and clutching his chest tightly.


And I still hold your hand, in mine, in mine when I’m asleep.
And I will mend your soul in time, when I’m kneeling at you feet.


So they put both of them in the ambulance and he sat in silence, but gripping his hands together tightly as he watched them fight to revive his other half…...

Everything was really over.


Disclaimer: I do not own Goodbye my lover by James Blunt.Nor do I make any money from it. All rights belong to the artist.
Sat for an hour and wrote this. Had to get it out. C&C are nice. Hope you guys liked the update!