Hold On Tightly, Let Go Lightly

Reviews from AFF.net

 

Moodysavage: Tender Sasuke is so sweet XD. And yes, Grandlinegirl doesn’t particularly care for Sakura so she made her an uber bitch haha.

 

Smint45: Tsunade will be in this later on XD. Naruto has a tough road ahead but at least the meds will help him out a bit.

 

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Naruto slept deeply and didn’t wake up until the following evening. When he finally did wake up, he felt like he’d been hit by a truck. His entire body ached and the craving... Oh, god the craving was horrible. The shakes came back immediately and he whimpered, curling into a little ball. He needed more of those pills... anything to curb the symptoms threatening to pull him under again. He couldn’t make it through another night like that; there was no way.



“Sasukeee,” he whined, pulling a pillow over his head and hiding himself away.



Sasuke's eyes opened and he immediately felt the shaking and knew it was time for another dose. Sakura had given him a low dose of the replacement drug since Naruto was just starting his attempts to get clean. They would serve as a way to help with the side effects of quitting and not be harmful to the blonde at the same time.



"It's alright; I'll go get you another pill." Sasuke stood and went to the locked box in his closet where he had stashed the needles the night before. He had since given them to Sakura, knowing she'd know how to dispose of them properly and now only contained the blonde's pills.



Shaking one out of the bottle, Sasuke placed them back in the box and shut the door, the number pad resetting to zero once more. Quickly going into the kitchen, he filled a glass with water and sat down on the edge of the bed once he was back in the room.



"Here Naruto, I have it." he said softly, his hand taking the pillow from above Naruto's head and helping the blonde sit up.



Naruto struggled to sit up, grunting as his body protested the movements. When he was handed the pill, he downed it with a gulp of water and then leaned back against the headboard. He wasn’t doing anything until it started working. It had been so much easier just shooting up... He knew he had to get clean, but... it really sucked.



“Thanks,” he sighed, carding his fingers through his hair. He cracked an eye open and offered the raven a little smile. “Sorry I woke you up. You don’t seem to get any sleep around me,” he snickered.



"I probably would have woken up soon anyway, it's almost 8pm." Setting the water on the nightstand, Sasuke settled back on the bed, leaning against the cushioned headboard, taking Naruto's hand in his once more.



Naruto’s chest fluttered and he spared a shy glance at the raven, a hint of a smile playing on his lips. It was so sweet how Sasuke wanted to hold his hand when they were close. And of course, how he was held at night. It made him feel incredibly wanted. Lying down, he turned onto his side and curled up with his head in the Uchiha’s lap.  He was more than happy to just lie there.



Sitting there in silence, just being around each other was surprisingly relaxing. He felt like he was making a difference somehow in Naruto's life just by agreeing to be with him. Not that Sasuke was with Naruto for that reason alone, the teen was too... he was too... something...



“What are you thinking about?” Naruto asked quietly. He turned his head to look up at the older man, not surprised in the least to see the slight wrinkle of his fore head as he thought, or the seriousness in those dark, dark eyes. “Looks like something serious.”



Relaxing just a bit at the voice, Sasuke smiled and gently stroked the golden locks that were so conveniently placed in his lap.



"I was thinking that since we're going to give this relationship thing a try... we might as well get to know as much about each other as we can." Looking down Sasuke saw the slight worry in Naruto's eyes. "I'm mostly talking about myself... I know you can't tell me some things but I hope that we can trust each other enough later on where you can feel comfortable telling me about you."



A soft purr rumbled in Naruto’s chest as those nimble fingers stroked through his hair. It turned him into a melted puddle on Sasuke’s lap, his muscles letting go of their tension.



“You don’t need my last name to know me,” he pointed out. “Besides, I’ve already told you more than anyone else knows about me. And I’ll tell you almost anything, all you have to do is ask, S’uke. Even if it’s something unpleasant about my past.” He turned his bright eyes on Sasuke; they proved his words to be true. “I’ll tell you who I am eventually. I promise I’ll be ready one day.”



Sasuke nodded, his eyes looking into those eyes that almost seemed too blue to be normal. They were so beautiful and Sasuke had just then realized how much he loved those eyes.



"I know you will and I promise I won't pressure you to tell me... Why don't we each ask each other questions, go back and forth....?” Leaning down, Sasuke gently kissed each scarred cheek gently.



Naruto beamed and pushed himself up quickly, catching Sasuke’s lips in a slow kiss. He lingered for a moment or two before lying back down, this time turning onto his back with his head still in the lap. “Sure, let’s do it. You start, since it was your idea.”



Smiling at the kiss he had received, Sasuke settled himself a bit more comfortably. He believed that Naruto would answer him but he hoped the blonde could handle it.



"How did you get these?" he asked, running his fingertips along the same scars he had just kissed seconds before, the marks looking almost like whiskers on each cheek.



“I’ll tell you, but you’re not going to like it,” Naruto murmured. His eyes faded, as though he was being swept away in memories. He closed them for a moment before opening them, training his gaze on Sasuke’s face. “My father is an alcoholic. He started when my mother died. I already told you he blames me... Since then, he’s come to the conclusion that I’m a monster. I’m the monster that took his wife away. One night, he came home drunker than usual and grabbed a knife from the kitchen... He tried to make me into the monster he thinks I am.”



Placing a hand on one cheek, Sasuke's thumb stroked the soft skin, feeling the slight raise of the scars.



"I'm so sorry you've been through so much pain in your life... no one deserves that." Sasuke's eyes were sad but not pitiful, he'd seen children and adults who have to suffer the constant reminders of their pasts through their scars, and it took its toll.



“It’s alright,” Naruto shrugged. “He did a lot of shit to me, but... That’s not my dad. While my mother was alive, he was the best dad ever. He loved me. I really think he’s gone a little crazy. Or a lot... But it’s not him that’s done that stuff to me, and anyways, I’ve gotten away from it. That’s all that matters.” He offered the Uchiha a small smile and reached for his hand. “What about your family? Are they around?”



“My parents are in Japan; my father is running his business from there. He um... didn't really approve of my coming to the U.S. He basically cut off all ties with me." The dark eyes took on a faraway look. "I talk to my mother on occasion but... my dad is pretty uptight so... he doesn't like her talking to me." he sighed closed his eyes, he hadn't thought about his parents in a while.



“Why didn’t he approve?” Naruto asked, and then realized he’d asked two questions. “Never mind, I’ll save that for my next question. But still, what’s with parents? Fuck. I would never be like that. I mean, not that I can ever have kid’s since I’m gay, but... I don’t understand what makes people act like that towards their kids.” Sighing heavily, he laced his fingers together with Sasuke’s. “I’m sorry, S’uke. That sucks.”



Sasuke smiled at that. It was a bit sad to think that it probably wouldn't be a good idea to let Naruto parent a child considering his abusive past and former drug use. Even in past tense it's not a good environment to bring a child into.



"What happened... to your mother. It's ok if you don't want to answer that..." He wasn't sure how much Naruto had come to terms with the death, even after so long, it took a long time for some to mourn deceased family especially that of a parent.



Naruto frowned softly, but shook his head. It still took him a moment to start talking. “She gave her life up for me. She saved me, and sacrificed herself.” A sad smile lit Naruto’s face and he turned it away, staring unseeing into the room. “We were out late one night... She was picking me up from my friend’s house. We were crossing the street when suddenly this car ran a red light. We had no chance. She pushed me out of the way, and... and she died instantly... As soon as that car hit her. She saved my life.”



Sasuke's hand rested on Naruto's bare shoulder. He had imagined many times what it would feel like to lose his mother, mostly as a child and it scared him to no end, to actually have it happen, and right in front of you...



"You know, that's instinct? Your mother would have done anything to protect you... that's how much she loves you." Not knowing what else to say, he just stayed quiet after that little statement. It was how he truly felt but... words don't make the pain go away.



“I know she loved me,” Naruto smiled. “I have a lot of memories of her, and all of them were good. She was an awesome mother and she cared about me more than anything. I know she wouldn’t have wanted things to end up like this.” He sighed heavily and stroked his thumb over the back of Sasuke’s hand, tracing little patterns in his skin.



“I’m moving onto something more pleasant,” he smirked after a moment. “So, you’ve never had sex before. Are you looking forward to it when you get to?”



Sasuke let out a quick laugh, not really expecting the question. It was a bit embarrassing having admitted that he was a virgin but he just hadn't found the right person, nor was he too interested before.



"I don't know... I mean, I know it's going to be amazing but it's just such new territory that it's also frightening." Shifting a bit, the raven let himself fully stretch out on the bed, Naruto's head now on his chest, his arms instantly encircling the blonde. He knew that question signaled the end of the back and forth, which was fine. He didn't want to make Naruto spill everything all at once.



“It doesn’t have to be frightening if it’s with someone you trust. It’s different with someone you like,” Naruto murmured, smiling up at the raven. “I mean... well, we can continue the questions with this subject if you have them. I do have experience,” he shrugged, winding his arm around Sasuke’s waist. “Has anyone ever touched you? At all? Or... have you touched yourself?” A little smirk lit his face as he sat up enough that he could look at Sasuke. “If you don’t wanna talk about it, that’s fine. We can go back to what we were doing.”



"Its ok, I don't mind... I've masturbated before but... no one else's ever touched me intimately." Sasuke could feel his heart begin to beat a bit heavier in his chest for some reason, his skin feeling a bit warmer.



Naruto was honestly surprised Sasuke was answering. He’d expected to be denied, but was more than happy. “You’ve probably thought about someone touching you before... Putting their hands on you...” He reached out and trailed the tips of his fingers down Sasuke’s chest. “When was the last time you beat off? What were you thinking about?” he asked quietly, his eyes finding the dark ones belonging to the raven.



Feeling the soft touch to his skin, Sasuke let out a relaxing breath and tried to concentrate on what was being asked. Although he wasn't too comfortable answering, he had agreed with himself to not hold back with Naruto.



"I don't really remember the last time... maybe a few days ago... and... I don't know what I was thinking about." Of course he knew that he was lying to himself, of course he had been thinking about Naruto for some strange reason. It had freaked him out when it happened, not yet used to having feelings like that for someone.



“Okay,” Naruto murmured, pulling his hand back. He could tell he was making Sasuke uncomfortable, and he knew the raven wasn’t being completely truthful. He felt bad for making the older man talk and think about stuff that he didn’t want to. Naruto was selfish. He laid back down, his head coming to rest in Sasuke’s lap and said nothing more about it, even though he really didn’t want to stop talking about it.



Damn, he had messed up again. The raven was just so nervous about intimacy and relationships... It was a complete polar opposite of how he had defined himself over the years.



"I'm sorry... I want to talk about it. I'm just not used to talking about stuff like this." His hand rested on Naruto's head, fingers playing with the golden hairs.



Naruto thought for a moment, trying to come up with some way to make Sasuke more comfortable. “Well, then ask me something. That way you’re not the one in the spotlight. It’s easier to ask questions than it is to talk about it, and I don’t mind answering anything.”



Thinking for a moment, Sasuke looked down at the handsome face and knew what he wanted to ask.



"Since I've never been touched by anyone else... will you? I want to know what it feels like." His cheeks reddened and he looked away inwardly fuming at himself for sounding like a high school virgin chick.



Naruto slowly sat up and turned on his knees to face Sasuke, his eyes searching over that gorgeous face. “Touch you....?” he asked, placing his hand back on the raven’s chest. “Or touch you?” he smirked as he dragged his fingers down to the waistband of his pants. He let his fingers flutter over Sasuke’s crotch, but he didn’t put any real pressure there; his touch was feather-light. “You want me to stroke your cock, S’uke?” he asked huskily. “Show you what it’s like?”



Not knowing how to answer that vocally, Sasuke just nodded slightly, his heart rate speeding up as excitement and anticipation washed over him. His eyes drifted down Naruto's body, really taking in the blonde's appearance and noticed just how much he liked those tight briefs on the teen.



Naruto smiled softly and shifted so he could straddle Sasuke’s thighs. He leaned in and caught the older man’s lips in a slow, thorough kiss as his fingers found their way to the waistband once more. His tongue traced over the seam of the raven’s lips as he gently tugged the material out of his way, freeing the thick cock within. Pulling away, he nipped at the bottom lip tugging it between his teeth as his fingers ghosted over Sasuke’s shaft, trailing up and down.



“If you decide you don’t want this, all you have to do is tell me. I’ll stop,” he whispered, trailing little kisses and nips along the strong jaw as he curled his fingers around Sasuke’s length.



Letting out a shaky breath, Sasuke's fingers dug into the sheets as a shot of electricity went straight through his body at the first touches. It was unlike anything he had ever experienced before and he had to admit it did frighten him a little, but not enough to stop the teen.



"It feels good..." he panted out, his eyes meeting Naruto's, their breath mingling in between them.



“Good,” Naruto smirked. “I’ll make it feel better.” His lips found Sasuke’s ear and he nibbled on the fleshy lobe, sucking gently as his hand gave its first real stroke. He started a slow rhythm, bringing his hand to the tip and then sliding it back down to the base. His thumb gently circled the head, and dipped into the slit as he worked his mouth down the pale column of Sasuke’s throat, his lips attaching to the thrumming pulse. “How’s that?” he asked breathlessly, his hand moving a little faster.



"Aaah... God..." Sasuke's voice was shaky as he tried to adjust to the new sensations, it was almost overwhelming but he didn't want to embarrass himself further by coming too soon. His hands left the sheets and instead placed them on Naruto's shoulders, needing to hold onto the boy somehow.



That was a good enough answer for Naruto. He kept his attention on Sasuke’s neck, sucking at the pale skin until a red mark formed. He licked over it, pleased as he sped his hand up a little more.



“Don’t hold yourself back,” he whispered. “I can feel you tensing. Just let go...” His hand twisted just slightly, and he brought his other hand down to heft Sasuke’s sac, rolling it in his palm. “I love your cock, Sasuke,” he husked, bringing his lips back to the raven’s. He didn’t kiss him; just let them brush together as he spoke. “I really do. It feels good in my hand. I bet it would feel better down my throat...”



"Oh shit..." Sasuke tensed up and reached his orgasm, his cum coating Naruto's hand as well as a bit of his and Naruto's stomach. He panted heavily, hips jerking as he tried to calm himself down but it was just so good. "Oh my god..." he panted as his grip tightened a bit on Naruto's shoulders. It was the best orgasm he had had in his life and he knew that his own hand would pale in comparison after that.



Naruto stroked Sasuke through his orgasm, milking that cock for all it was worth. When there was nothing left for him to coax out, he stole a lingering kiss. His own cock was aching, pushing out against the fabric of the tiny shorts. There was no way he was asking Sasuke to touch him, though. He was lucky he’d been able to touch the Uchiha at all.



“I’m glad you enjoyed it,” he smirked. “I’ll be happy to do that for you any time...” His eyes were half-lidded as he brought his hand up and licked at the mess coating it. Sasuke’s cum was almost sweet. It tasted so good. “I just have to, um... Well, I’ll be right back...” Scooting from the bed, Naruto walked awkwardly towards the bathroom.



Watching Naruto step into the restroom, Sasuke was almost relieved that Naruto didn't ask him to return the favor. He knew he wasn't ready for that yet and he didn't want to get himself in and then want to quit halfway through, it didn't work like that. It was amazing how lightheaded he had been during orgasm, he had never felt that with masturbation but he expected as much. Stimulation from someone else was always going to be better than your own hand.



He lay there for a bit longer, letting everything just calm down once more before he grabbed a tissue from the bedside table and wiped the bit of cum that had gotten on his stomach before he cleaned his now limp cock and pulled his pants back into their rightful position.



As soon as Naruto was in the washroom, he leaned back against the closed door and then sank to the floor. He immediately tugged his underwear down and wrapped his fingers around his own straining cock. His hand was still coated in Sasuke’s come, and it made him moan so loudly as he stroked and rubbed it against his aching flesh. His toes curled and his back arched as his movements became hurried. The sound of skin slapping together echoed through the bathroom, and he didn’t even try to hide his cry of completion as he got off replaying what had just happened. He lay there for a few moments after, slightly dazed and covered in cum, before he pulled himself up and began cleaning off.



Sasuke looked toward the door as he heard Naruto's pleasure filled moans on the other side and it made him feel good to know that it was him that Naruto was thinking about. Sure he knew that a lot of people fantasized about him but it was different when someone you actually cared about was thinking about you in that way. It was such a turn on...



Sitting up, he waited patiently for Naruto to come out of the bathroom, wanting nothing more than to take the blonde in his arms and just be close to him. He needed that after the explosive orgasm he had just experienced.



Naruto returned shortly afterward, looking happy and completely satisfied. He crawled up onto the bed and right into Sasuke’s arms, snuggling up against him. His arm wound around the pale waist and his fingers traced invisible little patterns over the raven’s stomach.



“That wasn’t so bad, was it?” he asked. “Me touching you, I mean. I know I liked it. I wasn’t lying when I said I loved your cock,” he snickered, brushing a kiss over the hickey he’d left on Sasuke’s neck.



"You just keep finding new ways to embarrass me, although I do appreciate the compliment." Sasuke smiled gently, his arms around Naruto's body, bringing the boy in close.



Naruto laughed and snuggled close, resting his head against Sasuke and closing his eyes. “You’ll just have to get used to it, I guess. If I like something about you, I’m gonna tell you.”



"You know that goes for me as well?" Sasuke lifted Naruto's head with a finger under the chin. "Like your eyes... I just can't stop looking at them, they're beautiful."



Naruto’s heart fluttered as his head was lifted. He couldn’t tear his gaze away from Sasuke. He didn’t want to. Whenever the normally reserved Uchiha did stuff like that, was forward with him, it made something melt deep inside.



“You think?” he whispered, a smile curving on his lips. “Thanks, S’uke...”



"Of course I do..." Sasuke's lips tentatively brushed against Naruto's before sitting up a bit, separating himself from the blonde. "I'm going to order some food... I can make you some broth or something if you want to try and get something in your stomach." Sooner or later Naruto had to eat, it had been 24 hours already since the last time Naruto had eaten.



“Mm, I dunno,” Naruto frowned. “Maybe later I’ll try and eat something, but for now I’m going to pass. It still doesn’t feel quite right, and there’s no point in you making something if I’m just going to throw it up.” Sliding out of bed, he stretched, keening softly as he rolled his shoulders and popped his back. “I’m just gonna watch TV for a bit, I think.” Padding out into the living room, he sprawled out on the couch and grabbed the remote.



Standing himself, Sasuke followed and picked up the phone and opened a drawer to his massive collection of take-out menus, deciding on a deli, a nice sandwich sounded good.



Watching Naruto on the couch, Sasuke couldn't help but smile. Naruto was already making himself quite at home, not that the raven minded at all. It was good to see the blonde so willing to adjust to something new... something better.

TBC